Lighting roleplaying match

Lighting roleplaying match.

Need 4 players and each player use a D20 dice roller from google (just google d20) or maybe you have some there.

The party is going to have:
1 magic user (you choose whatever the fuck kind of mage you wanna be like sorcerer, trickster, necromancer, hemomancer whatever)
1 strenght user (barbarian, aztec bodybuilder or some viking i dunno)
1 cunning rogue (thief, assasin, mercenary hired hand whatever you want but its gotta be smart)
1 wildcard (chose whatever comes from your heart)

Y'all will interpret what shit you wanna do and slap your D20 roll there: "I aim at that cow and shoot my arrow" '3'

The session will start as soon as the 4 members party is being choosen.

"You all are inside the soldiers barracks and are being given the quest of hunting down a murderer that's been on the loose lately
Your first instinct is to head by the tavern for information on the suspect description"

Attached: letsduel.jpg (1255x1088, 324K)

This seems dumb and gay. I'm in.

Attached: ~JC1.jpg (301x421, 17K)

Cool.

im down.Can i be a sexromancer?

BARBARIAN HERE!
I STORM INTO THE TAVERN AND DEMAND A CASK OF ALE.

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 000004.png (653x416, 25K)

Guess charming some tavern maids can work in your favor i guess?

You gonna take the wildcard or the magic user spot? It's your choice.

Also, you will be able to know it's me by the filename format, i'll be posting my rolls with screencaps like that

Ill take wildcard, i was thinking like making people hard at will, shit like that

Based.

"While the private describes the facial features and the modus operandi of the wanted murderer the barbarian runs away like possesed and storms and disappears from the sight of his party."

Guess you bastards will have to find him first of all.

I will be trusting for the same person to interpret its own character.
If i wanted a serious well streamed rpg session i wouldnt be here.

"Irun after the Barbarian making him aroused with a hardness spell" 20

Attached: 20.png (651x332, 22K)

"fuck those dudes". I roll to the tavern and scope out the scene to see what info I can gather.
>cleric btw
>I rolled a 13

Attached: JC4.jpg (195x244, 18K)

Screencaps not necesary.
I trust you guys being honest with your rolls.

"Being quick on its feet and getting bored by the quest the sexromancer chases the barbarian, while its legs can't match those muscular gluteus his magic can definitely do it.
Chanting his "insert your magic name here" weird magic he shocks the barbarian, whose loincloth turns into a funny shape, stays in the same place paralyzed."

"Once again ignoring any kind of useful information the sargeant can give, the cleric tries to no avail getting some info from the tavern"

We are only lacking a cunning fox/thief/smartsomething

BARB: I stop dead in my tracks, look down at my boner, turn around, and run back, enraged, towards, the sexcromancer

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 001227.png (653x471, 25K)

Still need a rogue? I am Hobrogue, the hobo rogue

I pick Jesus's pocket, looking for loose change

13

Attached: 12534.jpg (429x724, 30K)

Ah. Good of you to come, shitbird.
You know I'm poor you sonuva bitch. Get your hand out of my pocket.
You want to wait around for those clowns or we doing this ourselves?

Attached: JC93.png (472x500, 285K)

"An extremely angry and horny bag of muscles, testosterone and sex libido charges at the sexromancer"
You better roll for agility or something god knows what might happen if he catches ya.

"You try to check the private (whose name is Jesus) pockets for some spare change taking advantage of your friends making a scene.
You get a moderately well packed bag of silver and bronze coins, you also get the info about the murderer: A strange red haired thin demon who lefts his poor victims into a poor sight of bones, skin and clothes".

It's legit.
"A hobo stealing is not seldom seen so the cleric (whose name is also Jesus) catches you.
At least you still have the private's money"

>Casts guidance cantrip
>rolls 15

Attached: JC19.jpg (400x400, 28K)

"Sweet! Daddy's drinking top shelf tonight! Do what do we know about this ginger demon?"

Whomever the target was (except the other 2 who are somewhere else) can roll a single D4 to his next throw.

"He says"

>the rouge hobo

Attached: BaneJC.jpg (125x125, 2K)

"Jesus touches you and coupled with your previous succesful loot atempt you feel more capable now"
Next time you roll a D20 (horogue) if you want you can roll an add a D4 to it (your choice when).

since the sexromancer hasn't replied, i'll just go ahead and TACKLE HIM INTO THE GROUND, AND I SLAP HIS FOREHEAD WITH MY NEWLY ACQUIRED ENLARGED MANMEAT, before angrily yelling at the others in the party BEER! TAVERN! PEOPLE THERE!

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 003019.png (653x462, 25K)

Give me some details on the patrons around the pub please.

Attached: JC24.jpg (500x500, 58K)

Hobrogue feels a swell of confidence.

"Let's find the other two and ask around. Someone must have seen something"

Hobrogue hastily orders a beer for the enraged (and engorged) barbarian

>J looks over at the grotesque wrestling match
"i got this."
>Casts Calm Emotions on the barb
>rolls 18

Attached: dealwithitJC.jpg (480x360, 9K)

"Quick and horny you charge at the sexromancer and bash his head with your improvised bat knocking him out.
You finally arrive at the tavern and after your scream some people raise their kegs and welcome your fiery spirit"
Consider yourself inspired. If you want you can roll with 2 D20 next time (or any single time of your choice) and keep the higher number.

"There is only 1 man everyone bows to at least on this place. The tavern head who cheerfully welcomes you while he comands one of his maids to pour some ale to the barbarian."

He seems confident and everyone around seems to rely on him.
Its up to you to go with the interrogation.

You weren't there. Even if you where there he was charmed with a crit so your throw fails.

We could do this clean and wait. I could use clairvoyance?

Attached: JC37.jpg (300x480, 33K)

Barb:
wE NEED TO FIND SOMEBODY. THESE GUYS (points at party) KNOW MORE ABOUT HIM. HELP US FIND HIM. HER. IT. WHATEVER.

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 004200.png (638x422, 24K)

Hobrogue slinks up yo6the bartender

"Hey there, buddy. Heard there's been some murders. Perpetrator leaves his victims a bag of skin and bones. Hopin' you'd have some info"

7

We're working it out. Please.
>J motions to the booth
Have a seat. And keep your body parts to yourself.

Attached: jc166.gif (1326x1844, 67K)

B: AALRIGHT ALR-ight. Bring me something to eat when you're done.

"He claims"

Do you wanna ignore Jesus advice and go with this?

"The rogue stole my coin purse."
>J reaches into his satchel and produces a smoked fish
"Good enough?"

Attached: JC34.jpg (250x367, 25K)

Yeah, I'll jesus. Hobrogue knows when to stay under the radar

*follow jesus

>nods
I'll need that purse back.

Attached: JC49.png (405x567, 160K)

"Before you can even think of grabbin the fish a barmaid whose eyes have been fixated on you (only the rogue knows this) and your massive now calming boner runs off just to instantly come back with a chunk of grilled meat predicting this would be more to your liking.
She simply stays there waiting for your reaction"

Your purse is with ya.
Altough the hoborogue still has the private (whose also called Jesus) stolen purse so....

BARB: I'll need more than one fish, but sure, gimme. Try to find me some bread too.

Hobrogue grins.

"Lucky for us, the guard gave us an advanced on our pay. First round's on me."

He plucks the stolen coin purse onto the table

BARB: As i'm walking down to sit down with the fish Jesus gave me, I see in the corner of my eye the barmaid and yell at her:
YOU! CUTE! COME, SIT! DRINK WITH ME.

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 005415.png (657x427, 25K)

>checks inventory
Ah!
>lays an emerald on the table and begins casting clarvoyance targeted at the bar keep.
>rolls 16

Settle, bud. Seems you have a fan.

Attached: JC123.png (800x747, 175K)

"She happyly closes the distance between you two until she doesn't do it anymore.
Before sitting with you she stops with a calm face and comes back to the kitchen.
The cleric feels a slight magic disturbance and the hobrogue feels that something was off in her actions.
The barbarian simply feels that he was shut down"

"You start your casting but it will take a little while. Altough after laying the emerald and having some magic flowing you feel more magic disturbance."

It's up to you to continue but if you wanna continue with the clairvoyance youll have to roll another 20.

Fucking raining cats and dogs rn.
The light could go off at any moment lmao just as it was starting to get good.

BARB: HEY! JEEESUS! WHY DONT GIRL DRINK WITH ME? FIND ME ANOTHER!

>j shoots the hoborouge a look as if something is wrong and looks for a wish to continue?

Attached: jc150.png (360x540, 209K)

"What happened to the sexcromancer? Go find them and come back."

Attached: JC50.jpg (369x492, 39K)

BARB: NO! I DON'T LIKE HIM! HE GAVE ME BIG MANMEAT WHEN NO GIRL AROUND!

The hairs stand up on the back of Hobrogue's neck. He catches the cleric's glance and returns it, nodding. Something's not right.

Roll for perception, 16

You people are the biggest losers on Cred Forums tonight

>I presume the rogue is busy pickpocketing and focus on the spell.
>rolls 18

"Be quiet please. I need to focus. Keep everyone away from me."

Attached: jc165.jpg (786x1017, 91K)

"Buddy! Calm down and put that away. I'd rather not be run out of another village this week."

Hobrogue tries to convince him to calm down, 14

BARB: Acknowledges what jesus said, goes back to munching on the fish.
Looks at rogue, nods, shuffles manmeat back into loincloth and says YOU HELP JESUS SO HE CAN GET ME MORE FOOD.

"You start trying to look for intense glances, staring and anything off in the mood of the tavern"

"Pushed towards making some advancement in your quest you let magic run smoothly but firmly while channeling your magic
Sadly the emerald cracks and you feel like something cold and sinister flushed into your body, just for a moment
At this exact moment the right hand maid of the tavern fucking sneezes and a god damn shining wand falls from her robe, its clear she is the one who ruined Jesus spell"

Fuck i got a motherfucking 1.

Grab her!

LOCK THE DOOR!

>Jumps up and wields his mace.

"What is the meaning of this?"

Attached: JC51.jpg (224x309, 16K)

Hobrogue leaves from his chair to snatch up the wand ( adding the bonus)
10+3 is 13

BARB: Seeing the change of tone in voice in Jesus, I drop my fish and leap towards the barmaid, attempting to grab her by the titties.

COME'ERE, YOU!

Attached: Anotación 2020-01-21 011903.png (650x410, 25K)

In walks the basterd of the king who is good at everything turns into a dragon has sex with everyone in the party then ass rapes the demon god to death with the demon gods own dick

just play DDO faggot

Seeing the break in command. I rush to block the door.
>Rolls 19

Attached: JC7.jpg (297x350, 25K)

"He says"
"You rush and slith trough the groud as fast as you can but as soon as your hand touches the wand you feel an inmense pain.
The maid perfectly saw you getting closer and closer and smashed a wooden stool in ya
You are dazed and groggy already"

"The barbarian stops eating and charges towards the maid.
She clearly is catched by surprise but a literal white knight with an extreme ammount of effort grabs your hand before it reaches it destination.
Your natural momentum bounces him away and he crashes on a table instantly getting KO
She is now defenseless?
The head of the tavern stands up and looks the 3 of you."

"It's tightly locked and considering the high quality of the wood its going to be hard getting in.
And getting out"

"No one is leaving here without an explanation."
>casts Blade barrier on the doorway
"Start talking."

Attached: babyG4.jpg (225x225, 7K)

rolled 11

Hobrogue sees stars. He fumbles in his rags for one of his shivs, slashing at the barmaid's ankles

16

"STOP!"

Attached: TexasclassJC.jpg (672x672, 294K)

"You barely miss. You start to get your act together and sadly as soon as your senses start coming back you feel like this quest was far more than what you bargained for"

"The barmaid laughs at your spell and the head tavern slowly walks out of his place.
She claims: 'So you have choosen death' and her white dress rips on the back while some massive black bat wings pop off from.
Her canines increase in size.
She looks extremely dangerous"

Hobrogue, holding his bloody nose and still laying on the floor, turns to Jesus.

"Bitch hit me with a stool!"

Ya better make that inspiration (throwing 2 D20 and keeping the higher number) count barbarian.

Hobrogue scrambles backwards as fast as he can, trying to put the barbarian between himself and the barmaid

Fuck. 2 to dodge away from her

"hit her with your knives!"

>Rolls out holy word while charging
>fucking 5

Attached: JC48.jpg (320x320, 39K)

DM here. I love fucking little girls.

Attached: 49F14BAA-E786-4502-8E6D-0CAFB63CA00D.jpg (600x737, 97K)

(We are as screwed as that definitely-over-18 young woman)

"Her creepy transformation isnt the worst of the tavern at this moment.
A rotten smell arises and most of the people in the tavern either pass out or move like drunken and possesed.
Someone's hand lacks onto yours and its not letting go. His face its completely deformed.

"Your holy spell barely does anything to annoy the people in the tavern.
The head of the tavern doesnt even flinch while showing his perfect tanned and black silk smoth skin.
He simply asks "Why should i let you 3 live?" "

TPK coming up

Attached: JC176.jpg (735x735, 51K)

"Some unholy energy stops your charge and somehow suggests you to answer before trying it again"

Hobrogue lets out a Yelp and begins stabbing wildly at the face of the thing grabbing him

19

"What is the mean of this?"
>J pulls a vial from his robes and quickly sets it aflame
"We all die, or we get an explanation."

Attached: JC76.jpg (461x256, 34K)

"Ignoring the head of the tavern and feeling the rush of adrenaline you start stabbing, slashing and ripping rotten flesh apart. Most of the zombies that flail towards you get quickly dispatched
A sudden bang on the entrance door, someone's trying to get in"

"'The likes of us are inmune towards your threat, altough my dear tavern is not' he gestures you to put the vial down"

blue magic

Scrambling to his feet, Hobrogue zips behind the barbarian, brandishing a second shiv as he does. Hearing the banging on the door, he looks for a window to peek out of to see what's making it

Fuck user... I’m so fucking horny...

Attached: FE30B013-5476-41F4-8B33-F2F0EA6D5537.gif (332x332, 1.66M)

>J gestures for the murder hobo to take a back stance
>J doesn't drop the vial
"TALK!"

Attached: JC39.jpg (210x240, 18K)

"The windows darken and get more and more stiff and solid, its clearly magic.
While trying to check for potential help you hear some incomprehensible yelling, a massive crash on the door and something dropping on the ground. Guess that's all the help accounted for"

" 'You crash into MY place and demand answers? I disapprove of it.'
The whole ground shakes like a damn earthquake was plowing trough earth itself and a crimson lighting bolt slashes at your hand and at your vial.
The vial shuts off and flickers before dying and your hand hurts and feels frozen
He commands the same spell towards the hobo but despite hitting him in the chest it doesnt feel like you got more than a hard kick in the lungs
'My magic seems a bit off today guess ill get serious now'
Silver wings appear above him while his canines increase in size.
It's clearly a vampire lord"

Out you foul beast! To the darkness!
>casts remove curse and swings at the barkeep.
>mace roll 17 (7 if hit)
>remove curse FUCKING 20!

Attached: JC20.jpg (321x431, 121K)

"You charge light, healing, love, anything you can think of in your wound and feel a tremendous burst of confidence as all the pain vanishes, you charge at him with said confidence but despite catching a monster who never found a prey that fought back by surprise he easily catches your mace.
Instead of feeling despair all the good energy keeps your body moving and you punch the demon lord with your free hand.
You land a clean hit on his cheek.
He mimics your tactic and vanishes all that good will in your heart,mind and body while you see yourself flying trough the air and crashing into a wooden beam trying to stay awake
Despite your state you clearly hear him talk to you.
'Whats your name?'' "

Blocking a crit is bs.

"My name is Bojangles."
>rolls 11

Attached: babyG2.jpg (772x1207, 543K)

Sorry dude, I gotta bail. Been kinda fun though even though your rules are poop.

Attached: marvelJC1.jpg (169x298, 11K)

It was a healing crit tbf.

" 'Shall we meet again in another life when both your name and your soul end up becoming more strong than today'
After he turns his back to you, the right hand maid realizes its safe for her to move again after her lord as finished.
She gets closer to you and cleanly stabs your defenseless body with her wings
You start fading away.
She does the same with the barbarian and the rogue."

OP here, I’m tired too. Gonna end it. Gn boys and gg

Attached: 6900BD62-29EA-4FDC-95F5-8DBF9802BB8A.gif (200x200, 610K)

Mr walch has sex with a dragon

Guess i never could introduce the murderer and the gay's :/
Oh right the sexmancer
"A wheelcart crushes his brain, its not enough to kill him so he lives a short life as a vegetable before passing away"

Loli thread?
Loli thread

Attached: 1576857136754m.jpg (703x1024, 88K)

The dark lord shows up with his doomsday weapon and kills everyone in the game including him