You and your girlfriend wake up inside of a cave with no memory of what happened...

smack girlfriend in the face

retry

You blame the jews for the situation, then he goes deeper in the cave

he rapes her

Obama

he cut his hand

Spank her awake.

Reroll

Search for tools to scape

He sings Nickleback

Rape her violently

wet damp cave

try to eat her

Open belly button and absorb the rocks blocking the entrance.

Curb stomp her unconscious body

Amputate a limb to make a crude bone tool.

rerollin

rolling for this

Fucking Kek. This

...

You scream OBAMA and miraculously it wakes her up.
we could never do that to the gf no friendly fire

Attached: 3.jpg (550x400, 42K)

roll

Use gf as shovel to escape

Transition to a women and just sit around bitching about the patriartarch until desth.

Yikes
Rolling for searching the cave for any clues, areas that we can go holes with lights, any rocks that feel like air is behind them

Smash my cock and nuts with a boulder

Half way thru the cave you meet a grand wizard. Only trips can pass the wizard, or 69

Attached: 4.jpg (550x400, 33K)

...

pee pants

Here's your trips, problem solved

Hello mr wIzard i like your hat...might we be able to pass

Have the wizard suckle on your gf's teats

Gf fuck wizard, nullifying his powers

rape the wizzard
gf musst watch

retry

Have gf flash tits and puss puss at wizard.

Reroll for mindful diplomacy

here is your trips key oh great wizard, now let me through.

Winrar

Got em

This

You make a deal with the wizard, your gf gives him a blowjob to let you pass

Rape wizard into submission

The wizard laughs at your dubs and you pee your pants

Attached: 5.jpg (550x400, 34K)

go back to cave entrance and sleep

Perform intercourse with my Gf in front of the wizard as a power move.

Fine, I'll 69 the wizard.

trips

Enter blind rage and speedrun cave

>You and your girlfriend

ha ha ha the joke's on you
I'm kissless virgin
never had a girlfriend

Attached: bling.jpg (350x467, 51K)

Its a treasure chest! Although it is locked the wizard might have the key. DUBs decide

Attached: 6.jpg (550x400, 35K)

eat beard

use micropenis to open lock. find clone of gf inside.

change diaper

Take wizards hat and shit in it.

Eat the chest

reroll

Offer the wizard sex with the gf in return for the key

before going to ask the wizard im going to do a detect magic over the chest with my penis, a defect that has affected me my whole life and has had no use...until now

roll

Reroll

This

Let wizard do whatever he wants to gf in exchange for keys

Put your peepee in the keyhole

Eat the chest. Eat the wizard

Nice

Nice

smack girlfriend for not opening the chest with her nails

Roll

Your gf starts to flirt with the wizard, for she is a slut. One thing leads to another and she ends up on top of him riding. You let out a little tear of joy.

Attached: 7.jpg (550x400, 33K)

Jerk off and bukake the wizard

Take hat

join for threesome

reeeeroll

all three of you let out a stinky fart that opens the chest

>Pick up chest, squash them both
>Jack off to the gore
>An angel appears
>Gives keys
>Eats chest
Rolling

Rerolling

roll

Rolling for this

reroll

I’d like this one please

rolling again

The guy opens the chest and found so much child pornography

An hero for being a Cuck

we need that hat

Steal the wizards hat and wear it. Become the wizard. Magic the chest open. Then shit on whatever's inside

Rerolling for this one

That’s a bingo

rape wizard to death

Holy shit this is how it needs to end

That's TWO for this

Knock out gf and seduce wizard to use his magic to escape.

You scream because suicide is not an option. the wizard is about to cum inside your gf
the angel approaches

Attached: 8.jpg (550x400, 42K)

Striptease for angel while seduced wizard casts a high level spell to destroy it, and subsequentially blast a hole out

Eat the angel

You and the angel just start farting over and over again.

Reroll

Did OP accidentally paste the chest where the gf was supposed to be? Also, they all take drugs and become friends.

A retarded children appears!

Lets get this one

Open the fucking chest dumbass

wizard sucks his own dick

Reroll

This

Spoiler alert: the chest contains a second problematic angel.

Bingo

People! The chest is open and it is a pick axe
The wizard is ded

Attached: 9.jpg (550x400, 35K)

This? That's dubbz

Ask the Angel to burn the pickaxe for there is no escape from this hell

*farts*

Reroll

The guy put the pickaxe in his ass

Kek

Instructions unclear, shove pickaxe up ass.

Samefag

Roll

You each take hold of the pickaxe and then you both start farting.

reroll

Use bone shard from your now crushed gf or wizard to stab the angel and the fuck the hole.

Rolling again

Nu uh

It's dark in this fucking cave. No lights at all. Take off sunglasses.

Do this one because 69!!!

reroll

Snort wizard cum and gain his powers.

Go blind

pee

Reroll

The angel dies

Start wandering aimlessly around the cave for two hours because you do not feel like completing main quest yet

>No friendly fire
Fuck off cunt this game sucks

Doing ding ding

This

Winrar!

Use the escape hatch

Grab the pickaxe by the metal part and swing the handle around

You take off your sunglasses and stick the pickaxe up your ass

Attached: 10.jpg (550x400, 36K)

Ask the angel to marry you

take the pick axe and break out of the cave asshole

Wrong end of pickaxe OP

You and the angel fart until the pickaxe magically saves both of you. Then the pickaxe farts

Reroll

Dig upwards

Reroll

roll

That

Rolling again

Dig straight down

While pick still in ass, use ass pick to peirce angel wing and pin to wall.

Use your amazing twerking abilities to dig yourself out of the cave to freedom, ending this horrible scenario.

dig downwards

All about luck

rolll

DIG DOWN

roll

Roll once more

winrar

Holy shit he won

Reroll this. Lol!

you dig down with hopes of finding your way out of the god forsaken cave

Attached: 11.jpg (550x400, 28K)

find a cave full of rabid dwarves

Angel kills itself because it dont wanna be alone

Dig a home, with a stone bed, stone kitchen and stone wife and live out the rest of your days in cold, stony comfort.

Keep digging until you hit bedrock. You know an hero was never an option, but you now only have two choices. Pee enough to swim out of there, or stay there, and die...

Fart until the police arrive and give you a medal for best fart and then the police also fart

reroll

red dude takes an autofellatio break

leloll

NIGGERS TONGUE MY ANUS

Dig unill you find lava and befriend it, eventually assert your dominance and become the lava man

roll

NIGGER

Autocock.exe

NIGGER

Roll

find a ton of radioactive waste and become irradiated and now you can glow in the dark

Break through to a separate tunnel. Follow it out and it leads you to a white castle, murder everyone inside with pickaxe.......

Then fart.

Play dead

This

Tell angel to piss into hole.

Attached: 12.jpg (550x400, 38K)

Angel piss has to give you super powers right?

Tell angel to turn black and dig the hole farther for you

Reroll

GF's period suddenly starts and she starts perioding all over the place while he licks it up and jacks off at the same time

Politely ask the angel to fly up to heaven and ask Osama Bin Laden for guidance.

Become an atheist, and call in a drone strike on the angel

get the angel to use their angel powers to send me directly to hell instantly

Rolling for angel piss powers

Climb out of the hole and start digging at the rubble at the entrance of the cave.

Angel jumps in with you and jerks you off

Also rolling for angel piss powers.

kill angel with pickaxe to summon satan

Reroll

angel wall clips to beat some sense in to the man

stop digging for a quick piss drink as you are dehydrated

Rolan

heww yea

Using the help of Osama Bin Laden you reach the end of the cave. leading to a small town. DUBS decide what building we go into next

Attached: 13.jpg (1200x400, 76K)

Rollin

nigga fuck yea

rolling to go to mcdonalds to pick-up little girls in the play place

White castle

aww it stopped

rob 7-11

This.

go into mcdonalds and cum in the bin

Thanks for a great thread OP

Go into McDonalds and start digging a new hole.

go into hooters and flash dick

This

winbird

unfortunately the McDonald doesn't have a play pin and theres no lolis.. the jew tells you to order something or gtfo

Attached: 14.jpg (550x400, 98K)

Shit in his mouth

reroll

rape his wife in the back

Punch the little blue kid.

kidnap the small child onto your right then gtfo

Order him to give me all the money in the register.

Use his huge nose as a dildo and shove it up your ass

lure jew in oven with a penny

order an ice cream

transform into hitler

Dunk the jew's head in the deep fryer.

reroll

steal the little blue kid and run behind the counter where i deepfry him for the jew to eat

oh come on one off
reroll

rolling for this

go to hooters and pee on a waitress

Fuck the waiter

Request that he, specifically, grabs me some bacon. Just bacon.

poo on his chest

Order two number nines, a number nine large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number seven, two number 45s one with cheese, and a large soda.

shoot that place up

win

damn then marry him

snatch his hat, wear it and run

gf burger

mcdonalds doesnt have a waiter so You fuck the next best thing

Attached: 15.jpg (550x400, 97K)

circumsize yourself as a sign of respect

Cum on his kid.

cum on jew

now let him fuck you

Switch positions.

threesome with jew by offering the walking nose 10$ in cash

order something for fuck's sake

go to 7-eleven for a faygo

3 way with jew,
fuck him in the mouth

rerolling

Attached: 1578458584412.jpg (630x1134, 114K)

pick up the kid and run

reroll because i'm a faggot

get the jew to summon moses and kill these sodomisers

your GF appears as a zombie

order a happy meal, cum in it, then give it to the kid

Do we still have the pickaxe?

call Elon Musk

gf comes back as zombie jew kek

Kek

order a bigmac, but do a really loud fart instead of saying the word "big"

Drinks forty ounce and pisses on gf

And thats game. doog job bros

Attached: end.jpg (550x400, 120K)

Angel revives us, battles moses

you go into a bar and realize that this story was the prequel to all the johnny threads

999 reroll

GG OP
Kept me entertained for a couple of hours at least.

Take a shit in the fryer and stab the jew with the fried turd dagger.

gg op, had fun

great thread, thanks op

This

epic thread ty op

moses circumcises the kid

O shit it aint over yet boys

WHERE IS ZOMBIE GF!?!!?!?

Attached: cat12.jpg (750x999, 66K)

Osama Bin Laden is ressurrected and gives everyone a bomb.

Zombie gfs cunt turns out to produce pure Zyklon B. She can release it as she pleases. Obviously she doesnt die from it, because she is a zombie.

reroll

gg wp OP

Attached: giphy.gif (300x230, 258K)

Reeeroll

relise that you were in the matrix all along, the game has only just begun

reroll

i'm so going to roll for that zombie gf next time i see johnny