ALRIGHT Cred ForumsROS HERE ME OUT. THIS MIGHT SEEM LIKE BAIT OR SHITPOSTING BUT I SWEAR IT IS NOT.
>through agricultural processes of plant breeding, we have achieved larger and more scrumptious versions of our favorite natural foods >one notable example of this are tomatoes- they are much more wide and plump than in the past >they in fact are so wide now, that a slice from a tomato is about as wide as the typical burger >this makes it easy to determine how many tomato slices to put on a burger >if the slice is wide enough, 1 will suffice, if not, 2 smaller slices will do >this does not hold for pickles >they are not wide enough at all to put just one or two slices on a burger and call it sufficient >usually many pickles are needed, upwards of four or more, and unskilled/retarded workers often do not distribute these pickles evenly across the burger >im proposing we selectively breed cucumbers so that we get much thicker and impressive breeds >with these thick breeds, we could make very wide pickles, pickles wide enough so only one slice will fit the needs of a burger >this breed of pickle could be sold exclusively as a burger pickle >sell specially cultivated wide pickles to restaurants and fast food chains >??? >immense profit
What do I do with this idea? How do I start cultivating cucumbers? Where do I receive funding? I'm also open to working with any potential partners.
fuck, hear not here, didn't proofread, but I swear im intelligent
Adrian Cook
DONT LET THIS POST FAIL. THIS IDEA IS GOLDEN.
Austin Barnes
It's an interesting concept. I think the issue becomes the pickling process in itself. The bigger the fruit, the harder it would be to pickle. This is just speculation, but it makes sense as a larger fruit has a smaller surface area. A quick Google search yielded this: heb.com/product-detail/vlasic-dill-hamburger-stackers/151606 Apparently, they haven't caught on.
Adrian Davis
actually, these pickles do look larger, but it's hard to tell. in any case - they aren't wide enough to fit the width of a full burger. well, i mean all it would require is a larger container to pickle it in as well more of whatever concoction they immerse it in. im no pickle expert but i dont think it would be too hard
Julian Martinez
Yes, but I mean it would take longer to pickle an individual pickle, making them even more expensive.
Jaxon Murphy
Who the fuck wants a pickle big enough to cover the whole burger? I usually order extra pickles myself but that's just loony.
ah, i see what you mean. this is true, but wouldnt over time as the business grows, the time it takes to pickle would be irrelevant because the older batches would begin to be usable as newer batches are pickled? this would be hard to maintain large growth though i would think.
Austin Thomas
You just want bigger pickles to shove up your ass, don't you?
Colton Flores
think about it this way: as i stated in the post, lots of pickles means lots of disorder and room for mistakes. pickles can fall off, shitty workers can distribute them poorly, etc. also, think about the typical tomato. a nice tomato that covers the whole burger evenly is, in my opinion, a godsend. i know i would appreciate a bigger pickle.
Jayden Lee
stop fucking with my head. normal sized pickles are thick enough for my ass anyways.
William Long
Not really. The growing time for the cuke would be longer as well.
Ryder Sanders
well yeah that makes sense, but is this really a big hit? there might be a longer wait, but you also get substantially more return from a single batch of megaburgerpickles(tm) than a harvest of regular cucumbers
Carson Hernandez
I like this pickle idea. If it fails you'll at least have developed a new strain if cucumber, which is pretty cool and also marketable
Evan Davis
Probably not. Lots of small ones is going to give you a better overall yield. It's all about the surface area.
Nathan Barnes
Growing times are pretty easy to manage through rotation in a hothouse environment. It's a detail, but not a deal breaker
Ethan Howard
do you mean for the pickling process? i would imagine that the overall cost for growing the cukes would be lower though, as culturists through the ages have tried to make crops bigger to receive bigger yields. as for the surface area difference, i'd have to do the math but i don't think the surface area would be much different. i would think though that because the radius is much larger it would take longer to seep through the whole cuke. not sure, just speculation exactly what i was thinking, but you seem to have a better understanding of this than i do
Charles Diaz
This. The true purpose for all this nonsense: Vegan dildos. Profit
Gavin Adams
Dont mess w the pickle/tomato ratio. Cucumbers are just things that turn into pickles pretty sure. Tomatoes are berries pretty sure. Just make the burger different. Duh, now ketchup, musturd. Or no condement
Eli Butler
Mabey if you cut a few shollow cuts going down the length of the cucumbers it will work
Aaron Scott
you could keep the pickle/tomato ratio by volume by cutting slightly more thin slices of wide pickles to account for their extra size i was thinking about this, but i would need to really research the process of pickling to make such a claim
Christopher Nelson
The tomatoes you know now are about twice as big with only about a third of the flavor of heirloom varieties. Your idea sucks balls
Enjoy your big tasteless produce
William Barnes
the flavor of pickles isn't from the cucumber it's from the pickling you absolute retard
Then just drink the brine, numbnuts. Since you aren't tasting the cucumber, yeah?
Joshua Robinson
IS THIS REAL AND NOT SOME ANOMALY CUKE? IF THIS IS REAL I AM GOING TO BE SO ANGRY quit baiting. if you aren't baiting you are an actual idiot. why would someone pour brine on a burger
Charles Brooks
Wtf I don't want a whole bite of pickle
Tyler Foster
>why would someone pour brine on a burger That's just dumb. You take bite of burger then follow with a sip of pickling brine Or dip your burger like au jus
I like your idea op, considering the pickling process, you could just pre slice the cucumbers before putting them in the brine. This should also halve the time it takes for them to finish. Godspeed op, let's see those big ass pickles
Gabriel Powell
why not? you already enjoy full bite of burger, tomato,condiment (hopefully),lettuce, and bun. i feel like bigger pickle would just tie the whole experience together better. alright this is definitely bait, gave me a good chuckle mate thank you for your insight and support user. megaburgerpickles will soon be a thing of reality
Dominic Hughes
Fake, it's just a big pumpkin. It says "pumpkinfan Peter" on his shirt in German
Ikr I love being able to eat a pickle in one bite... if it’s one big pickle the size of the burger. You take a bite of this big pickle and it’s juice will drip or you gotta eat the whole thing in one bite. Op good luck with this
Jayden Gray
Cant post the link to where you can buy the seeds because it keeps thinking its spam but all you have to do is google search the image
Nathan Mitchell
>pumkin Does that look like a pumkin to you?
Justin Parker
just fucking slice them longways idiet i swear to gawd you fucking city people are dumb as fuck
amazon.de/dp/B077BF24NV/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=riesen gurken&qid=1579752739&sr=8-7 I think this is similar to what you are referring to. even if the breed exists, it's not being used for what I am intending to use it for, as far as I can tell yeah, or maybe a large gourd, and it does say pumpkinfan peter on his shirt exactly what i'm looking for. doesn't need to be this large or long, just wide.
Chase Bailey
>I would appreciate a bigger pickle too
Lincoln Anderson
Yeah But seriously, there is a reason they don't pickle fully grown cucumbers and why petite pickles have their own market segment.
There are also varieties of cucumber that are the size you want but just like I said, no flavor.
Kayden Morales
Fucking nasty. Pickles aren’t all about the flavor. It’s the texture too. The crunch is important. A big ass cucumber would make for almost no crunch and mostly just mush that’s pickle flavored. No one would buy that shit.
Isaac Peterson
there's a variety of cucumber called a lemon cucumber that grows to the size of a large orange or grapefruit, you could easily pickle one of these bitches and cover a whole burger with one slice
why would flavor of the cucumber really matter? to me cukes are pretty flavorless and just taste like water. i feel like all of the flavor comes from the pickling process. would pickling a larger cucumber not result in as flavorful a pickle you think then?
James White
/thread
Levi Rogers
AMAZING CONTRIBUTION. Would need to try this and see how they taste though. i dont know why you think a wider cucumber would mean less crunch we are talking spherical cross sections here, you think you are the first person in this thread to think about this? of course you could go that route but that's not what megaburgerpickles are all about.
Adam Torres
What about zucchinis, they're basically just wide cucumbers
No dude I've thought about this years ago and didn't remember until now but my idea was that we grow tomatoes big enough to cover a whole burger into the shape of a cucumber so it's much easier to slice. That'd be the shit.
Ethan Brooks
i've had them, they taste just like a regular cuke! i definitely think it would work
Connor Morgan
So I can tell just by that post that you eat a western diet with WAAAAY too much sugar. I used to be like that until I cut nearly all of the extra sugar out of my diet. I can taste those slight hints of sweetness in things people don't associate with being sweet these days like cucumbers and whole grains. Another user above also pointed out texture. NEVER discount the importance of the texture of our food. A large pickle is a mushy pickle. A mushy pickle in a soggy bun. A soggy bun is a shitty fucking burger (unless it's soggy with grease) Petite dolls have their own market segment because of their crunch. So.
Just make sliders, bro. Sliders solve nearly all of the problems
I used to think like you. I used to want every bite to be ideal. Then I realized it was the bad bites that made the good ones better. I don’t want an even burger. I live for the good bites and get by on the shitty ones.
Brandon Wood
You sound like one of those wine tasting fags who make up 90% of what they say to sound sophisticated
Jack Baker
if this is true please show proof
Brody Brown
i looked into this just now, seems like the taste diff would just be too much
William Evans
>Sophisticated kek if you think I sound sophisticated, whether fake or not, that says volumes about you.
James Gutierrez
The bigger you grow vegetables, the more coarse and tasteless the flesh, you fucking idiot.
Charles Bell
Op, your onto something. Hold it, profit from it, and patent it.
Gabriel Roberts
these seem spherical enough that you would only get a few truly burger-sized slices from each cucumber. For max efficiency you'd need something more cylindrical
Brody White
THICKLES!
John Hill
dear god i missed threads like this OP your a genius thats here to save us all
Ryan Rodriguez
>ohh I do say this cucumber is terribly sweet, I bet none of those peasants even understand how unendingly sweet this cucumber is
Oliver Scott
maybe it would be easier to breed this kind of cucumber for length? also, you could get several fairly approximately burger sized slices, just like you can with tomatoes
Connor Ortiz
>Cucumbers have no taste. All you taste is the pickling brine.
Charles Martin
Slice them diagonally you fucking retard
Joshua Edwards
OP here, im not the one arguing with you thats some other guy. but i agree you are being wayyyy too pretentious about pickle tastes and im talking about burgers, not some artisan food. the mush would be a problem though but those lemon cukes mentioned in the thread seem like a possible work around this
Kayden Peterson
>this glass of water is simply too acidic, I feel as if my mouth is melting, I did make sure that the water was purified, people just dont understand, this isnt a gift, but a curse
Zachary Rodriguez
>Implying burgers aren't worthy of artisanship
Turns out OP is a faggot after all
Andrew Morgan
this is the biggest fag reply in this whole thread. please reconsider your values and then kill yourself
Grayson Ortiz
>>Implying burgers aren't worthy of artisanship.
you read this shit before you post it right?
Henry Bailey
>These pickles are too small and cause disorder in my burger. We need to breed a cucumber large enough so i only need a single ordered slice
Joseph Parker
>dear lord Original Poster you have curfufled my bottom one too many times by even implying that burgers shouldn't have a whole grain kosher salt whatever the fuck bun and a patty made of ox meat with a hint of lamb meat plated with demi-glass
John Gray
lol Nice comeback. It was as bland as I'm sure your burgers are
Brandon Nguyen
youre doing gods work user
Asher Collins
>my lord I will have to fire my cook, she put a grain too much salt on my food and I'm dying, dying of dehydration
OP here. My thread has descended into complete faggotry caused by a handful of posters. I just wanted to make a quality thread about a quality idea but some faggot had to start derailing things. Goodnight
Caleb Long
>I want a bigger pickle to fill my bun but you're dumb if you want a pickle with flavor beyond salt Nah. OP is a fag
Oliver Perez
Oh shit, sorry bro I didn't mean to derail shit, I meant to fuck with a pretentious fag
OP I'll remember your thread and idea for many moons and when you eventually solve this problem and make millions I'll let everyone that OP was not a fag this time.
Joseph Cook
>flavor You mean vinegar, salt, pepper, and cucumber
nowadays we wouldn't do thia through breeding we would do this through gmos.
Henry White
imagine not eating pickles that were pickled in coom on a bun made of a mix of yeast infection, dry coom and wet coom, a patty that is made of semi-hardened coom, and a slice of tomato that's only nurturement while growing was coom
