I turn 30 tomorrow

I turn 30 tomorrow

I'm still a virgin. What do?

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nothing

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Pay an escort, man. It happens, don't worry about it.

Hire an escort, have fun. "B-b-but muh ego!" yeah no, you're 30 and still a virgin so you obviously don't care enough.

IDK user. Whats your life like?

Prostitute?

Losing your V-Card isn't everything, idiot. It's just a dick in a vagina. Doesn't matter unless you really want kids.

Fucking some unenthusiastic hooker isnt much better than jerking off, just saying.

Im 33 and virgin and i dont care.
Im surprised you still do.

How? Jw? what do you do in life? Genuinely curious. No sex isnt a big deal, but seems like you would fall into some pussy at some point.

Congrats you are officially a wizard.

How do you get that far in life and not get laid? The only things I can think of is if you're saving it for marriage or if you have some autistic hobby like anime or video games.

I am wondering the same thing.

Unemployment, shut-in lifestyle, depression, anxiety.
Mostly these.

>or if you have some autistic hobby like anime or video games.
Spoken like a true boomer. Most girls aged 18-25 are into video games and anime. It's not a nerd thing anymore. On the contrary, you're more likely to be an outcast nowadays if you aren't into video games and anime.

Join us brother, and I will yeah you a most useful spell.

First to cast chloriformico-cumragia you need the reagents, to obtain the first see you local alchemist, the second being a new wizard you should have aplenty.

... You know how this goes.

Through the power of magic you now have all the sex you want, congratulations apprentice.

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Video games Ill agree with. Anime is a big reach there bud, still a niche thing after about age 15.

You're clearly out of touch. Just go on Twitter. Most girls are into shit like Attack on Titan and shit

I guess, but even guys like that I knew would get laid.

I knew a guy who would get drunk everyday at 10am and play sc2 for 8-10 hours till her passed out.

His parents gave him a house, so he rented out 3 of the 4 bedrooms.

Boom shaka laka 1500$ a month income

Even he got fucked from time to time. I guess he did have SOME social skills tho.

go to pattaya thailand and have fun

Well my family is not that rich.

I disagree with MOST. some, more than before sure, but its def not most. There probably more girls that would accept a weeb now than say 10 years ago.

Ya, not that they were super wealthy. That house is probably a big part of what got him laid because we would have parties there all the time.

STOP WATCHING PORN.
STOP JACKING OFF.
Stop painting miniatures.
Stop watching anime.
Stop playing video games.
Watch Jacko podcast.
Watch joe rogan podcast.
Watch Steven Crowder.
Stop eating chips and candy.
Only buy food on the outside isles of the grocery store.
Stop drinking anything but water - sparkling is fine.
Learn how to cook at least 3 good meals.
Go to public areas w/ your interests to increase social aptitude, cons, table top nights, friday night magic.
Wean yourself off nerd hobbies, and make your hobby going to the gym and lifting weights.

Ok boomer

The cringiest part is that this isn't even satire. Fucking zoomers

26 and in the same boat. Will probably be in the same boat at 30 too.

>go on twitter
Sjw's are not the kind of women anyone wants to attract.
And no most girls don't play video games unless it's candy crush or some basic game like Mario. You are not gonna find even a few girls working through Dark Souls.

36 tomorrow
non virgin but give a shit about woman.
by the way.are you a wizard?

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Now I personally prefer chloroform-cumragia due to how easy it is to obtain the materials, as even a highschool alchemist can produce it with the right recipe, but to be honest vinus-rohypnol has a superior effect.

The downside of this spell is the difficulty of obtaining the reagents, rohypnol I's not so easily created in your local street alchemist's kitchen and is often adulterated.

Tldr chloroform-cumragia is the most cost effective spell for apprentice wizards.

I have to go, it's magic time.

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10 precent of men never find a sexual partner, I'm sorry friend

This. I will say my wife does enjoy some COD campaign from time to time.

Its mostly candy crush and stupid ass mobile games. Also this color by number on the phone shit.

>You are not gonna find even a few girls working through Dark Souls.
Just like you're not gonna find even a few girls into cars. What's your point? Yeah there are some video game genres that attract a certain gender more than the other. Still, video games are video games.

>video games are video games
An autistic hobby

peer reviewed study or it didn't happen

Oh snap, cash in on your wizard powers

Its fine as a hobby, if you actually treat it as such.

That's why gays exist.. the population is 51%female tho...

Catladies.

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I turn 30 in 4 months, same boat here.

No. Because most women (at least the younger ones) play video games, even if it's not your favorite obscure JRPG. It's only autistic if that's your only interest in life, just like any other obsession

1. be a wizard
2. do nothing.
3. ?????
4. Profit

people in these threads always be so mad "wahhh im a wizard, what do. me personally i cant wait till im finally a wizard. I think about it everyday

Agreed. Im married with kids own a business, home and all that shit. Unless I have plans with my wife (watch netflix order food and fuck, basically) I play pretty much without fail from about 8:30pm-1am friday and saturday night.

video games them selves arent the problem.

You've dogged a bullet..... trust me on this one.

20 honestly seems a bit young to lose your virginity.

Can I interest you in a grimore?

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What's the matter? I am 35 and there has not been a single time in my life where I haven't paid for having sex. Just accept it and move forwards. I am not good looking, really awkward with women and not very good at flirting. The sooner you accept you are like this, the better.
I live a pretty happy life, even if sometimes I would really like to have someone with me even to just cuddle and do things together. But, hey, I figured that you can't have everything.

kys

true dat.

Accept your lot in life and don't try to be happy. Those tryhards are miserable fucks anyways.

For all the wizards n protowizards kind of curious what you guys look like. If you are 300 sacks of shit that that smell like armpit from 30 ft away I get it. But if you look halfway decent and are in ok shape I’m super curious how this happens

I'm glad you took such a mature approach towards your circumstance, we need more people like you out here

youtu.be/PvHBPXKJvVI

Supposedly 7 precent of females never have sex either
It was in my gen psych textbook I'll try to find a source

That sounds about right. Is that 10% of like regular healthy adults seeking sex? Or does that include people with various disorders?

I like to read and that does not translate well to dealing with people.

it is all true but this is something his parents should have taught him, not some random guy on the internet. And trying to fix your life at 30 is pretty much impossible. I was was him I would disown my own parents and start a new life from scratch.

how many times have you paid for sex, did you enjoy it?

Or a dick inside a femboy

Maybe read some Dale Carnegie that shit still holds up

It's not hard to find someone to fuck. I'm a fat ugly btard and even I get laid. Just don't be afraid to get rejected a couple times

I want to say it was healthy adults but I don't remember and unfortunately I rented the textbook so I can't go check it. I guess I'll just have to search the interwebs

Dont listen to these failed men in this thread.
Never go to a prostitute!
Get a a gf like a proper man.
Dont become a subhuman that pays for sex!

>Supposedly 7 precent of females never have sex either

Would be more than happy to shed my mighty arcane powers alongside a witch of mediocre appearance, like myself.

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>Dale Carnegie was an American writer

>American

Sorry you lost me.

Yea, yea. How to win friends and influence people is a super good read, despite the cringey title.

>And trying to fix your life at 30 is pretty much impossible.

Depends. I finally graduated college at 27, got a good job at 28, moved out at 30, worked out and lost fat, got a gf at 31. Anything is possible. Helps that I still look and feel young.

Man, how many times? I honestly don't know. First time was when I was 20. I started doing it regularly when I was 23. Let's say once per month for 10 years, so about 300 times (in reality it's way more than that, I think).
Did I enjoy it? Well, yes. The good thing about paying someone to have sex is that you choose what you like, no matter if it's in your league or not. When I was younger I really enjoyed it, having sex with woman that were totally out of my league. The only thing that I really miss and I would really want to have is a bit of real human warmth on my side, someone to cuddle with or to hang around and do things together. And that's something that you can't get from a prostitute.

Unemployed at 30? You have to NOT want to work. Do you get disability money or something? I would say I've barely had my shit together most of my adult life & still ended up learning a trade & making it to middle class (lower middle class, but still)

Would you guys consider not having lost your virginity at 20 a big deal?

There is a fucking epidemic of middle aged neet males all over the world.

Fuck no. Look at the OP ffs

No. U still got a few years before it will start to become an isse. U hit 30 tho and have your first encounter with a woman and bust in 3 seconds or cant get hard because of nerves or something tho, its gonna suck

Aight I guess that's true. Ty bois

You are a good goy and hand egg is great, amirite?

It is good advice, it's just exhausting to put into practice.

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Get a life size doll.

Trust me when I tell you this, don't worry about it, really.

When I was younger I had heard that it'd be absolutely fucking amazing, because of that I had set my expectations so high that my first time was prettt much ruined. I was expecting better to be honest. She was a virgin, so the quality in pussy wasn't an issue, I'm working with a bog standard 6 inches, plus we used plenty of lube.

Since then, Ive been with 2 other women and the sex outcome is the same; It's just warm, wet and tight, that's it, nothing special.

Don't put so much pressure on yourself, it's fuckin' stupid to give a shit about it now.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=0S7jIzqO6P8

Get a hooker

Freeze yourself until we have colonized the galaxy and you can fuck space hookers and do space coke.

Many things that are good advice are difficult.
I can tell you that shit works, if you are systematic about it.

I actually dont care for hand egg, too much about the coach. Very little creativity is allowed to the players, also not super skilled except a couple positions. Its pretty much whos the biggest fastest nigger.

I'm pretty feminine, have long hair, and like to trap in my spare time. I think that puts most women off. 6'1" and 165 lbs btw. Can't wait to get my virgin wizard powers.

go gay.

>Never smoked anything in my life. Not a single puff of a cigarette or a joint.

Smoking isn't fun but that you have never tried, fuck did you spend your life in a cell?

I'm a wizard and even I have smoked and done drugs.

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Not the ones I wanna bang... they’re not models, but they’re not anime land whales either.

I've seen my father smoke and drink all his life away. When I was a kid I always had clothes smelling of cigarette smoke. I still remember the horrible smell of our family car, drenched in cigarette smoke that has been sitting there, unventilated for years, deep inside carpets and seats.
Since I was a young child I promised myself I would never smoke. To this day, this is the only goal I've been able to achieve that I set when I was a child. And, to be honest, I never understood the appeal of it. You don't look cool, you smell horrible, you get nervous if you don't smoke in a certain timespan, you will get some disease out of it and it costs you lots of money. So, I never tried because I never wanted.

protip: stop being pussy, then you get that pussy.