Which book should I read first?

The Hobbit, it's like a couple of fun rpg sessions in written form...the lord of the rings trilogy is some old fart showing every little facet of the model village he constructed in his basement

I would start with the hobbit, it’s the setting for the events of lotr. But if you really want immersion, read the silmarillion first. It’s technically written after by Tolkien’s son, but contains background insight into the world itself.

hobbit first

You're kidding right?
This is bait right?
So I want you to really think about your next response. I want you to demonstrate your comprehension on what you are about to read next.
If you need scratch paper go ahead.

If Doug and Sarah are both fishing and collection coconuts. Sarah can collect 7 Coconuts and hour but only catch 2 fish in an hour. Doug can catch 6 fish in an hour but only collect 2 coconuts.
How long does it take for you to read this?

fun fact! you can read the hobbit four times in the time it takes to watch the movie adaptations.

LOTR is stupid nerd shit

Tell us all again how you can read 300 pages in 2 hours.
Go on. Tell us

>I bet you'll read this

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Fellowship because sam is best girl~

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the Hobbit. it has a key element upon which a good deal of the plot of lotr rests.

It wasn't me who said that and you failed to answer the question. Do I really need to explain to you how reading works?

>How long did it take you to read this?

Your reading comprehension is tenuous. You need to practice more. You should be in school kid. I know it's hard but life will only get harder the older you get so make use of your time while you can still leach off your parents.

By reading 2 and a half page per minute.

It’s not that difficult to read 300 pages in a couple of hours dude. I can’t but it’s possible, skipping parts that don’t necessarily need to be read to keep going and whatnot. I use audible and it takes like 5 hours to narrate a book this long word for word.

Hobbit first.

>for mathematics.
You earned it champ!!

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>It’s technically written after by Tolkien’s son
wait wut? His son only editied his manuscripts got them in order for publishing...he didnt write it you fucking retard.

This is not completely inaccurate.

how do you know the parts to skip if you don't read them at least one time?

Read the Hobbit first dumbass...it was originally just a childs book but he began to incorporate parts of his Legendarium into the story and eventually the story got sucked into Middle Earth...when asked for a sequel he ended up writing an adult book

You might have scrawled some shrieking gibberish earlier in this thread, but that's no matter. The only thing that's relevant is how long it takes you to read 300 pages. A weekend would be realistic. Even a long full day spent almost entirely reading which includes breaks for meals, etc. If you're going to continue to insist that you can read 2.5 pages every 60 seconds for 2 hours straight, you're just going to continue to make yourself look like a boasting fool who is unable to perform simple arithmetic.

Semantics, no need to be an asshole fuckboi. He edited and published his fathers writings. I didn’t say he created it man. The fuck is wrong with you?

>collection coconuts
>and hour

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you dumbfuck retards understand a couple of hours isn't always meant to be taken literally, right? it's common usage to say something will take a couple hours meaning give or take an hour maybe even two depending on the speaker. it can be a loose way to say it'll take more than an hour and less than let's say 4. quit being nitpicking retards just to argue.

>I didn’t say he created it man

>It’s technically written after by Tolkien’s son

thats more than semantics jackass. "written=created" His son was the editor- Tolkien "technically" wrote it.

I skim. But I seldom actually read anymore. I prefer audible, which I why I’m telling you that a book of 300 pages can easily be read in a few hours.

You're attempting to make sense on Cred Forums, user.
This is futile, the perma-angry children will not have sense, or conversation, or discussion, or anything that doesn't involve writing shrill posts in which they'll always attempt to provoke and entice verbal fights.

It's all they're able to do.

Pic unrelated

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You don't even have to skip parts.

Ok for the poor kid who doesn't understand speed reading.
The trick is instead of playing a narrative in your head, (imagining the voices like your being spoke to)
You just look at the words and as soon as you understand one, you progress to the next.

Here's some assigned reading, it's actually a pretty good story.

>The curse of the squirrel, by Laurence Yep

--From the time a giant squirrel curses Farmer Johnson's best hunting dog, things are never the same around the farm, and hunting little animals ceases to be a sport.--

It's great, the dog goes insane and hides cabbages because they start talking to him.

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books are gay, with that said if you seriously get upset about what somebody else says on Cred Forums you have autism, everybody here is retarded

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The Hobbit is an easy read and does all the worldbuilding for LoTR. It's a no brainer.

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>books are gay

Imagine saying this. Even at this godforsaken dump.

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Pretty sure Christopher edited Silmarillion and Unfinished Tales, Hobbit and LOTR were published while JRR was alive.

Answer the question faggot.
You answer my question and I'll answer yours

You're assuming stuff about me based on things someone who wasn't me wrote.
As I have explained before

You're reading comprehension is tenuous. I never said I could read 300 pages in 2 hours.

I can however read the hobbit before the movie ends which is around 2-3 hours.

Just because you are at the reading level of an elementary school student doesn't mean everyone else is. Guess what kid. People are better than you at some things. It's just a part of life. Get the fuck over it.
It's your own fault for being a slow reader.
Bring me a book and I'll read it to prove you wrong and shut you up.

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yes this is right. plus Christopher has done fall of gondolin and beren & luthien more recently.

My nigga

Man... why do you bother?
You can't reach a Cred Forumstard.

>Doesn't understand how reading works
>Continues to get angry about responses they read

fuckkk this guy is lit af right now over a Cred Forums post

Is this the part where you tell us how big your dick is, how much money you make, and how many women you've fucked? Because I'm supposed to go into a meeting in about 10 minutes but I want to stick around for that.

Aidan Binni is a retarded homosexual

Editing and writing are often interchangeable in publishing dipshit. Believe whatever you want, my suggestion to op was that he should read it. You’re off on some bullshit that only serves your pointless need to take things out of context like you’re in some cock measuring contest. Yes user, you are right. Feel better now tough guy? (I don’t really care if you do or not tho)

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Let the backpedalling begin!

The hobbit is fun
Lotr is boring as fuck

>Pretty sure Christopher edited Silmarillion and Unfinished Tales

alas, he just passed away a couple of weeks ago
nytimes.com/2020/01/16/books/christopher-tolkien-dead.html

I have a copy of the Silmarillion signed by him...

Small world. I also have a copy signed by him. I met him 20 years ago very briefly in Gloustershire.

>Yes user, you are right.
I know.

Because it's fun picking on people. I wouldn't do it if they didn't react.

Lit as fuck of the marijuana.
You down with literacy, my nigga?

Do you usually wait around for guys dicks?

Have fun at your probation meeting!

youtu.be/OJc9vTfkteI

>I also have a copy signed by him
Nice! Is it the red hardcover with Ted Nasmith signature too?

Congratulations

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Relax user...

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idioms.thefreedictionary.com/couple of
Idiot

It's this copy. Couldn't believe my luck at the time. Kept it very safe ever since.

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Oh I'm relaxed homey.

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So salty! I know you'd like to continue to impress us all with empty boasts about your reading speed but sadly I can't stick around. I think our respective viewpoints can be summarized thusly:

You: I can read a 300 page book I have never read before in 2 hours.
Me: BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA

I'll let the rest of the people in this thread decide who to side with. And you can go ahead and write multiple posts to make it seem like other people agree with you -- just like you've been doing. Cheers!

Are there really people who can’t read 300 pages in a few hours?

The Hobbit is an excellent story. It's well told and includes some of my favorite scenes and lines from anywhere in the JRR Tolkien scripts.
"Aint 'ad nuttin but muttin fer three damn days."

Riddles in the Dark

The FellowShip of the Ring is a masterpiece and its /such a fucking drag to read/
Seriously felt like I was forcing it.
So much walking.

Then again Tom Bombadil is a badass

Can you please go to your child molesters rehabilitation meeting already and stop shitting up the thread?
I'd tell you 300 Pages in a few hours is child's play but you'd get an erection since I mentioned preteens.

cum on it and post pics

You're getting embarrassing now.

So it's gone from a couple hours to a few?

Why are you so upset that people can read faster than you?
youtu.be/tvTRZJ-4EyI

I don't care if people side with or agree with me. Life isn't a popularity contest kid.

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Do you assume ever post here is from one person?

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You really can't read and I suspect English isn't your first language.

Read LOTR first you'll appreciate it more
The Hobbit is good but at the end of the day it's a children's book

Kys faggot

Some people just don't use plugins, nor display ID's while possessing the ability to read at an 8th grade level.

Different user, but the average person reads about 380 words a minute, the Hobbit is about 96,000 words, which works out to slightly over 4 hours. I read about twice the national average speed, so I could finish it in a little over 2 hours.

Don't assume your diminished capacity is the upper limit.

no you don't. fucking calling out the liars in this thread. get rekt cucks.

Like I said. They have tenuous reading comprehension because they don't practice reading. Probably a dropout who gave up on school because "the world was against them" and they couldn't handle being challenged or disagreed with. Some people just can't handle being wrong and instead of adapting and overcoming the obstacles life throws at them.

>No child left behind at it's greatest

> I read about twice the national average speed
> with 1/4 of the reading comprehension.
funny how so many people here constantly rate *themselves* above average in all metrics.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illusory_superiority

fuck off with your bullshit

"I'll let the rest of the thread decide."
Gets dog-piled by people calling you a retard.

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A thief will think everyone steals.

Did I hurt your feelings buckaroo?
Sorry, I should have used my kid gloves

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>I read about twice the national average speed
Oh of course you can lol

>Which book should I read first?

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My grades, test scores, and job indicate otherwise. I have excellent reading comprehension.

But that's because I spent a lot of time reading, including long and difficult works. In other words, I don't just sperg out on Cred Forums.

It's a shame - but it's never too late to find a passion for reading.
One can hope the poor bugger discovers it.

It’s generally understood that a couple of whatever can mean 2, but less than 5. I don’t understand what your deal is with it. If someone says a couple of something, they don’t usually mean exactly 2, otherwise they would say 2. It’s ambiguous. Most educated people can read a page of text in a minute or less. If one is singularly focused on the task of reading between 2 and 5 hours, it’s colloquially accepted as having done so in a couple hours.

Oops, meant to link

Depends on of what country it's the average national reading speed.

> yet I am shitposting on Cred Forums right now
> but I superior to you in all ways

lol what a faggot. It's such a pointless thing to lie about and it's hardly a crazy claim. Idiot.

Implications of innocence are only presumed by the guilty.

The fact that you find that outrageous and improbable says more about your limitations than the range of human ability.

Ask him about his maths skills.
Or how well versed in theoretical physics he is.
Or how well he can dismantle and reassemble an engine.

You'd probably be surprised that those are not his strong points - some people just aren't afraid to point to their own finer skills before doing the same with their less enhanced ditto.

You made a false claim, I pointed out why it's false, and used myself as an example.

And you react as if that were an existential threat to your self-esteem.

Hmm.

That’s not that bad?

Beautiful, but you're still a tosser, and you assume the worst.
What's so fantastically impossible about that user having a signed copy of a book?
Relax.

If we don't see a timestamped cumshot on the signature, it didn't happen.

which is why you lied about it. you thought no one would say anything. guess what? we're not your idiot friends that suspect you off lying but don't call you out on it. we aren't your friends and will let you know when you are full shit liar!

Then for you, it probably didn't happen.
I don't think that guy cares what you believe or not.

No, your father should've used a condom
Faggot

>Narcissist
If I was a sperg I would demand proof and state that no one could possibly attain higher scores on tests than I; but I'm not the angry kid who thinks people can't read father than them.

Miss your buss?
>Pix related

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Holy fucking autism.

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/thread

It's like talking to a plank of slightly moldy wood.
Give it up man - he's too dense.

You misspelled bus, you sure you shouldn’t be on it?

Yes, and? That's two and a half hours, tops.

I'm sure he's holding his cock in one hand, and cuddling the signed copy of the Silmarillion in the other, sobbing softly while whispering at the signature "you're a beautiful, proud editor Christopher, you're not a slut, don't let them make you a slut."

>the hobbit takes a couple hours
I believe you could turn the pages of this book in 2 hours. Actually read it with anything resembling minimal comprehension and retention? Not a fucking chance.

Wow. Your reading comprehension is shit m8.

That was affirmation of I don't give a flying fuck what they own or who signed it.

Cred Forums: where everyone is smarter, richer, better looking, and more successful than average. Who knew?

>Hook line and sinker

Shit... now I'm getting hard...
Seems you didn't catch this the first time.
idioms.thefreedictionary.com/couple of
No U.

You mean, where everyone is idiot savant, NEET, looking like something and more bitter and resentful?

The Hobbit is boring as fuck. There is no point in reading it at all. It's a dumb kids book.

Who do think is more likely to chime in on a subject? People who are better than average, or people who are poor or average?

Self-selection is involved. You can't treat it as a representative sample of the population.

Not me. Everybody knows that I'm a scumbag.
youtu.be/SZB37eIi_z4

No child left behind... well, except of course you.

I liked the part where Shrek got hard after looking the fat kid.

No. You

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You ever hear of commas, bro?

once again moron!

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illusory_superiority

don't trust a person's ability to self-evaluate. ever! stupid fuck!!

But that's the only good part. The rest of the book is trash in verse.

The hardcore orgy scenes were pleasant as well, very evocative and well written.

I love how these threads devolve into shit posts after the first 5 posts that actually provided constructive advice for op.

Nice burn m8

>New "Q" Lar

>links to a wikipedia article
>twice
>thinks it proves everyone else is as dumb as him
sad

Those 5 posts are proof that Cred Forums has gone to shit

Welcome to Cred Forums fren

I know, it probably stung that user really bad.
Poor sod.

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Looks like you posted this earlier. You had a chance to backpedal earlier by admitting "a couple" wasn't really accurate and that it was more like 4 or 5. But instead you just doubled down on stupid and tried to handwave away your mistake. Which is fine, of course. Just wish you could admit you were wrong.

>Just wish you could admit you were wrong.
That's what everyone else is thinking about you.

you're the saddest person here as far as i can tell. i post independent source of information whereas you are supporting some dumbfuck here telling us about his supposed superiority and you just think there's no problem there. or you are the dumbfuck that actually believes that he has superior skills in (((fill in the blank)). I doubt it. now stay the hell away from me jackass

Sorry boyo, I'm not that guy.
I am however on his side.

My mother is in a comma

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Nigga doesn't even know what a bibliography is

I'm sorry to hear that, I hope her recovery is punctual.

Lol OK boomer

F42BF54FE1E67B21F3B78D00B69A020E7120E325

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>i post independent source of information
It's a Wikipedia article about a specific cause of misinformation, which you haven't demonstrated applies in this case. I listed another case that's more likely to apply (self-selection), which you ignored. Instead, you doubled down with the same link, and you're using so broadly, you're literally claiming that it can be used to dismiss any and all claims made by anyone.

Even putting aside your inability to complete a coherent logical argument, your writing skills may explain your reaction. The best way to learn to write is to read extensively, which seems unlikely in your case. That could explain why you're reacting so defensively.

Read David Eddyings books. Lots better.

it's the same story, except Sam is replaced by a bitchy loli

Sure, I'll bite.
My ESL ass takes about 5 hours to read the hobbit, if reading at a leisurely pace.
If you're faster than that, great. If you're slower than that you'd better be ESL, American, or both, because otherwise you have no excuse to be that shit.

>9778▶
>
>it's the same story, except Sam is replaced by a bitchy loli
Oh boi tough call. Sam is great, but loli is hard to beat.

i wonder how chipper you'd be after I fucking flattened you with a single punch to the larynx? fuck you, you're full shit and came shitpost worth a damn.

Except she spends the whole series whining
Sam doesn't

Feel free to try.

Since we are kind of on the off-topic, I'm trying to find a series I read several years ago, it was a lord of the rings knock-off with the power rings, but implied to be post apocalyptic and I specifically remember the main character being tone deaf and uncomfortable with music. Anybody got any clue what its called?

It was written first too.

+1 for there and back again a hobbit's tale by bilbo baggins.

youtu.be/yWKYfhkRrZM

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Wheel of time

I used to read thousand page door stoppers in a day, three hundred pages in 2-3 hours sound reasonable to me.

great story

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Nah it wasn't wheel of time, I've read that enough times.
Another scene I remember was a bunch of soldiers finding a Toyota and trying to assess its viability in battle.

Bring not your witchcraft upon this thread foul one.

It's just amazing to me how many incredibly above-average people are on Cred Forums.

You don't appreciate art

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Talented and intelligent people tend to have a higher IQ overall, which predisposes them to depression and draws them into Cred Forums because its a locus for cynicism and like minded dissatisfied individuals. It just feels good to sometimes reaffirm you aren't the only one who's disillusioned with your fellow humans.
.
As idiom goes:

Cred Forums is geniuses pretending to be retards.
Reddit is retards pretending to be geniuses

Artwork is highly flammable for a reason.

Naw I just like reading, you do anything enough and you get good at it.

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So are farts

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what even is the source on that

FSSSS

you're more of the leddit type. stick with them faggot.

You.

You can't beat a loli. You can, but she might run off.