Gonna have an etizolam night tonight! How many mgs does it take for u guys? Shit just made it over from Singapore lol

How do you take mdma? My user left a rock around about the size of the tip of my thumb and i was considering trying it. How much do i take etc.
I don't go out that's why i don't know this stuff :( i've been agrophobe for about 5 years now.

fake and gay, have one on your tongue and
timestamp newfaggot.

why don't you just buy a fucking scale, it's not rocket science

Drop the website name u ordered it from

There's scales in the box but how much is a normal dose? I'm a literally pleb with drugs. Only smoked weed and shatter my whole life. I took half a codeine two days ago because i'm coming off the flu(no corona plz) and it fucked me up. No joke i was lying in my bed giggling about how comfy and warm i became. I've avoided hard stuff my whole life.

A dose the size of two lentils stacked on top of each other should be enough for ya. (I’m talking lentils not beanz)

100mg is a standard dose

1mg = 0.5mg of alp
start with 2mg and don't black out or you'll wake up in jail or in another country

crush the rock and weigh it out with a milligram scale and put it into gelatine capsules. go read rollsafe.org and follow it to the letter - yes, dumb braindead ravers will say "duuuuude take 200mg without reagent testing it for meth I do it all the time bruh its fine" but they're idiots who've taken too much too often and have a tolerance along with their literal brain damage. drugs aren't a good idea with mental illness, speaking as someone who had agoraphobia for much longer but I can't stop you from escaping into neurotoxic amphetamines instead of slowly trying to beat it like I did. all the years wasted with oxy that I could have been living. shit sucks, man.

etizola, I paid with a credit card. Be aware that they might be selectively scamming people.

Ok i'll half that. I can be real sensitive with drugs. The codeine was the weakest codeine available. Even the shit at the dentist fucks me up bad.

If you wanna go with the low low end, I’d recommend at least 60-70mg. 50mg may be a waste or even an uncomfortable sub threshold experience.

Shit, you're making me reconsider. I'm doing pretty well recently except the flu.(poor me kek)
Eating dinner every day if nothing else. I just came off a 45 day stretch of toast 4x a day and nothing else.

i would do some reading on erowid before id take advice on dosage from anyone in this thread.

Fucking love these
2mg would do it for me, but there is always a risk of going hard and cruising though hundreds of pills in a week and fast-forwarding some time

There's probably coke and vallies in the box too. Should i take something else? My user is fucked up all the time on everything. I watched him take 8 tabs(sleeves idk?) of real lsd(we get fake shit here) then forget he took them and take 8 more. I had to stop him when he forgot about those too. He was bouncing on the bed like a toddler asking me to find archer who i thought was a person for half an hour but it's a cartoon.

As someone with agoraphobia and other types of anxious tendencies, I was hella nervous for my first MDMA experience. I’m a tense person, always have an upset stomach because IBS, and I let my thoughts take over me.

All my anxiety melted away after the come up (which was fairly intense). My muscles completely relaxed, which my anxious ass was expecting to be even more tensed up. Anxious thoughts weren’t arising and instead I was in love with everything around me and the idea of being alive in general.

This could be a therapeutic experience, but do your research first. Spend time reading up on reddit, Erowid, rollsafe, etc.

MDMA is showing great promise through the MAPS studies for helping those with various mental illnesses and end of life anxiety. Do it right and it could prove to be very beneficial.

I only ordered 50 1mg tablets, unless I accidentally order another 200 while high af lol

>various mental illnesses and end of life anxiety.
This is the appeal. My user was the exact same as me then we got sponsored from our oldest user for 1k each after he won a settlement for a mil(half taken as tax immediately) on some oil dumping thing. Now he's got all these buds and literally does not spend any time alone or at his own place.

I know that eating disorder feel too. I ate under 800 calories a day for a long time. the easiest way to beat agoraphobia, in my opinion and experience, is to accept that it's not gonna feel great the first time you go outside: you'll probably be dizzy and scared and you'll want to curl up in a ball and disappear but that feeling will stop when your brain is used to being outside. set somewhere like a shop or even a nice tree or something to go via google maps, look at the street view, put your shoes on (after dark maybe if you have social anxiety too) and just go. your brain is the devil and the moment you decide to do something it will try to beat you, thus, the only way to beat it is to not think about it. bring a friend to support you through your panic attacks if you want. agoraphobia isn't forever, I thought I'd die housebound and imprisoned by mental illness since age 13 but after almost 8 years I've beat it, and now I can slowly start putting my life back together. I'd say good luck but you don't need it, it will get better as you try and persevere.

Your friend sounds like an incredibly irresponsible drug user and someone you wanna be careful taking any substances around.

Valium is literally for anxiety so it could be nice to take just one or half of one to melt the anxious feelings away. Coke is overrated IMO and not a drug for people who are anxious introverts, but others may disagree. I’ve never found much value in it beyond doing a couple lines if they’re free. Not that great of a drug, plenty of coke heads who will beg to differ though.

MDMA is great if you’re willing to do your research and take the right dose. Just gotta throw on some music you love, lay down, close your eyes, and go wherever it takes you.

4mg of xanax got me fucked up last night

I agree as long as it's used once or twice therapeutically and with intent and effort rather than to dull and distract from the pain. it's very easy to slip down that slope, just as it is with benzodiazepines. responsible recreation is one thing but mdma isn't something you want as a potential dependency so I'd suggest avoiding self medicating before progress is made if possible.

>you'll probably be dizzy and scared and you'll want to curl up in a ball and disappear but that feeling will stop when your brain is used to being outside.
That's not the nature of my agoraphobia. I don't mind being outside user just anywhere people can see me. (Agoraphobia isn't a fear of being outside, that's jsut the typical manifestation but you probably already know that)
>bring a friend
:( they'd have to be imaginary
Anyway thanks this does help. I do know what i have to do but every time someone reminds me it stops all the bullshit justifications and excuses i have for myself.
>Your friend sounds like an incredibly irresponsible drug user
Yeah they are.
>Valium is literally for anxiety
Yeah, it gets a bad rep around here because all the heroin circles take it or they become part of the heroin circles after taking it.
> plenty of coke heads who will beg to differ though.
My user was taking fuck knows what yesterday and i wanted to make sure they were okay. He went on an hour long rant about coke and how amazing it was but he has had real shit which isn't too common here. Nike, nasa, spacex. 20 odd minute about petrol and how the nike stuff can't be re-cut again and again by people because of stamps or something

100%

Harm reduction and responsible nonfrequent is first and foremost when it comes to these substances.

I have like .8g of MDMA leftover from when I first did MDMA months ago at a Tame Impala concert and haven’t felt the need to do it again.

MDMA is legitimately neurotoxic if taken frequently after all. It’s currently being used in studies after all other avenues have been exhausted.

However I do see merit in skipping some avenues that are known for being less successful and jumping to MDMA for a single experience if and only if the person is well educated in the topic, well prepared, knows what they’re taking is MDMA, and knows what they want to work on during the experience.

>just anywhere people can see me
that was me for a long time too. it evolved into feeling dizzy and overwhelmed when outside but that was the root cause of it when I was 13. I still feel like that sometimes but I'm slowly learning that the beliefs I have about myself being ugly and stupid and worthless and fat and that all of the bad things in my life are my fault and so on that had been implanted into my head as child are wrong. I still think I'm ugly and still have a lot of body dysmorphia but I'm trying my best with fashion, skin care, hair styling, exercise, and speaking without whispering. I'm doing a lot better than I was at 15 or 16, where I'd just sleep all day and self harm at night for being filthy and worthless. it gets better user. very slowly sometimes but it does get better. hopefully in a few years I'll be a fully functional adult with a healthy mind and life that I can just enjoy, but until then I'm keeping at it bit by bit, little social interactions and changes in my life at a time. I've done my waiting in hell and I've suffered enough. I believe in you and so will you after those first baby steps, user. the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago but the second best is now.

>when I was 13.
Same age for me. It lasted about 4 years the first time then my cousin dragged me out of it but she ended up being a complete psychopath gaslighting the fuck out of me and my user about our family. She told everyone i was raped by my user and all sorts of shit. so i just bailed then here i am.
>I still think I'm ugly and still have a lot of body dysmorphia but I'm trying my best with fashion, skin care, hair styling, exercise, and speaking without whispering.
I feel, i can try sometimes but i don't know some days i find it hilarious and incomprehensible that i could even want to be any different than i am, i should probably see a therapist but they fucked with my head as a teen too and the facility was well understaffed and overworked so i only got 5min appointments.
>the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago but the second best is now.
Based advice.

going out at night really helped me at first too. nobody's around after 7 or 8pm but supermarkets with self checkouts usually still are if you check their opening times. going to an empty supermarket a few times and then lowering the time of day until it felt normal to be around a few burnt out workers who were too busy shopping to pay attention to anyone, and then I went from there to interacting with cashiers and then into coffee shops and clothes shops and started trying to be who I wanted to be, to a version of me that didn't have ot be ashamed of being alive. I'm not stable enough to see a therapist yet but my understanding is that it can take a few tries to find a good one who clicks well with you. don't be afraid to tell them about your previous experiences and distrust of their profession, I've known more than a couple of internet friends who are the same after being treated as a thing that needs curing rather than person as a child or teen, including myself. childhood trauma and mental illness sucks major dong but you don't have to let it defeat you. things can always be different until the moment you die.

Take 4, Drink a 750ml, and kill yourself.

>that it can take a few tries to find a good one who clicks well with you.
I had one who was fucking amazing but that was with my cousin and she lived on the other side of the country. The other three literally told me jsut to stop smoking the weed (which i have and did) and all my problems would be solved apparently.
>things can always be different until the moment you die.
Yeah i always remind myself of some shit i read that stuck whenever i get too low or defeatist. It was something along the lines of no feeling will always last.
>going to an empty supermarket a few times and then lowering the time of day until it felt normal to be around a few burnt out workers
This is also based

The good therapist was my first too. She told me right from the start that while she will help me as much as she can, her job was essentially just to confirm and reinforce all the stuff i already knew and only a few people legitimately don't know how to be "normal". The rest just need someone to tell them that they are right to build up confidence to start acting on it. Honestly, the few sessions i had with her has kept me reasonably sane all these years after.

>The other three literally told me jsut to stop smoking the weed (which i have and did) and all my problems would be solved apparently.
lol. I stopped vaping the electric lettuce after a particularly weird acid-ket-bho trip. I have to say it hasn't had a negative impact on my life despite valuing it as a mild psychedelic that produced some new insights occasionally. I miss it but it's more difficult to escape into lollipop land rather than dealing with my problems now. I literally grew up on the internet and still waste a lot of time here but I'm slowly replacing it with the things I wanted to do as a child and young adult. being able to much the mush and boof the buds again will be nice when I'm happyish with my life. you might like /r/agoraphobia and /r/housebound, sometimes it feels very lonely dealing with these issues but you're never really alone; in a way we're all living the same life in this world, you and I and everyone who posts about social anxiety and childhood trauma and all those who aren't happy right now. I don't know what time it is where you live but try to get something done today or tomorrow, however small or insignificant. I put things off all the time and end up no closer to my goals a week later, it's not a great habit to be controlled by.

Was it shipped discretely?

no, it's totally legal in my state.

>I literally grew up on the internet and still waste a lot of time here
Same, my mom was dealing with my nephew who is deaf and majorly autistic. The education system was trying to fuck him over so we got left to our shit and got all sorts of entertainment but never any real attention but it's hard to resent when we had a dad who told us every other month he didn't want kids and dissuaded us from hobbies and shit because he would have to deal. He got cancer later and turned jesus(he always had his foot in the door) then recovered so he became someone else so that kinda helped because i can't blame him anymore.
>/r/agoraphobia and /r/housebound
I'll bookmark them now.
>I don't know what time it is where you live but try to get something done today or tomorrow
12ish so getting to sleep will be something done because i don't do that anymore until i start falling asleep at the toilet
>I put things off all the time and end up no closer to my goals a week later, it's not a great habit to be controlled by.
Yeah, i'm always thinking "future me will be more capable so i might as well let him deal" but it ends up coming around and i hate myself because i become less capable(at least in my head) over that time.
anyway, i really should at least try sleep tonight. You've really helped user and sorry if i haven't put much back in. That's some emotional vampirism shit but i'll make sure it's not wasted. At the very least i'm not touching my anons drugs so win for that.

You'd make a good therapist btw, you know how to help without it feeling like accusation, you can empathize better than 99% of the people i've talked to even irl and you take the fucking time.

it's not emotional vampirism, you're in the same place that I was a few months ago so it's only human that I try to offer my insights and empathy. knowing that I'm not alone here is cathartic. my childhood problem was severe depression that nobody saw because my emotions meant very little to my family until criticality and subsequent rebellion against the life I'd been given and all the blame and scapegoating that comes with a child acting out, then I was taken out of the education system and left to my devices, left to grow into that life. funny how life fucks people over sometimes, but it could be worse I guess - some people never understand their trauma and never break the cycle, they let the past bleed into and control the present until the very moment they die, most pitiably.

that's very kind of you to say, and means a lot to me as somebody who greatly values frank humanity without the silly ego masking and kindness. I thought about that professional path in life when I was 17. I think I'm a little too young and inexperienced for it professionally though right now, and not emotionally stable enough hah.

maybe in 5 years all of this will be behind both of us and we'll have the haven in life that everybody deserves. maybe in 10 I'll be living in canada or france or somewhere new and helping people. that would be nice even if age 30 is a practically boomer territory. I wonder what you'll be doing, user, and who you'll decide to be once your tragedy in life is past you.

this thread will 404 before you wake up but if you're looking through an archive or you have Cred Forums or whatever, you can drop me a line via floral99 at protonmail dot com if you want one day. excuse the dumb address, it's one of my alts from when I liked plants. maybe you will or won't, it's your choice that I respect regardless.