I genuinely believe i might have some sort of psychic abilities.. every now and then...

For most people slight mania can be beneficial, but you need to know how to track it so it doesn't get out of hand. Find a therapist to work with and use this chart, it will help you track it and know where you're at. If you start getting too manic there are methods you can use to cool it down with medication reserved for extreme situations. If you you do this properly, it can be way better than being totally medicated.

You don't know what you're talking about, OP is clearly describing manic delusions, no schizophrenia.

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Cause they're not schitzo, I used to get this delusion that I was the savoir of the world and it was like this rush would come over me and I felt like the universe was communicating with me and me alone and it was guiding me on this quest, The high is such a rush but the more you entertain the mania and delusions the further you slip into this state of not knowing where the delusion stops. I literally thought that I was seeing all these signs and it took me some time and medication to undo all of that deluded conditioning. Mania feels so good in the moment but it's not worth it in the end

Damn.

Mine is similar, I'll think everything I experience is message. If I'm out in public and there's 2 people near me talking, I'll hear there conversation and think it's messages. Or when I read writing on buildings, hear commercials that pop up, etc. I also discover a new passion every few weeks or months that will totally consume me until I suddenly lose almost all interest.

This is what happens when you’re a lonely retard and don’t have any hope for the future.

You’re not living in the present

you got a higher quality version of that image? i'm none of these anons but i suspect i may be bipolar or something reading these posts

Yeah I hear you, and it may seem like a good time but being stable and living in reality, just being a regular guy is the best thing. It's kind of hard and scary at first though especially when this manic side has been propping up this almost superhuman image of oneself. And without medication, at least at first it will be harder to get out of the mania when it washes over you

ive had something similar happen a few times where someone says something in my dream then a few days later either a friend says that exact same thing or i overhear it in a conversation. Honestly it just feels like dejavu for a bit then i move on, in my opinion its nothing more than a coincidence. Although I am open to the fact it could be something like the "butterfly effect" which would still make sense, I don't think it could be a psychic ability.

There's tons of different ones, google bipolar mood chart. What makes you think you're bipolar? It took me 23 years to figure it out for myself.

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Are you on medication now 24/7? I'm scared it would change who I am but the mania is really hard. When I'm manic I totally isolate myself at work and barely talk to coworkers, it's like I can't have a normal conversation because I'm so energized and hyperfocused on one thing, most recently it was the crusades lol... Sometimes I'm literally shaking while talking to people because of the manic energy. It could be a lot worse though, the worst I've done is spend thousands of dollars or woodworking equipment that I've never used. And the binge eating gets bad.

i'm not really sure, reading these posts i recognize some things in myself like feeling that which op described as influencing your reality through your thoughts. i also seem to have periods with a far better mood and peace of mind than some others in which i feel like a piece of shit.
however i have also thought that maybe i have autism since i've never felt like a proper human being and i am clueless when it comes to social interactions, many times just staying silent

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Op, can you make it so that I could get some money?

Get help. Meds can do wonders. It won't be forever, probably. But these arent normal thoughts.
I went through a similar thing, and it's almost magical the way you feel when everything connects and seems to pertain to you. But it's not real.
Someone else said it. You get lost in the delusion and can no longer discern fantasy from reality. While you still have some semblance of a coherent mind, GET HELP.

You sound like me man, I also originally thought I had autism, but all the things you described can definitely be bipolar. I have the same issue with social interactions.

Do you ever get overly excited and say or do things you letter get embarrassed about?

Do you go through periods of intense inward reflection and self analysis?

Do you ever become really excited about something, like more excited than most people? Then eventually lose interest?

Not OP, I agree with you about getting help but that doesn't necessitate medication. Find a therapist experienced with bipolar and track your mood shifts, there are ways to "push the needle" and avoid your mania or depression getting worse.

holy shit yes to all of these, so much.
it's even weirder since you said it took you 23 years to realize this. well guess what, i'm 23.

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People who have not experienced it will never understand. But it happened to me just today. Time is not what we think.

did you ever get diagnosed by the way?

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Man there are all kinds of explanations for this in psychology.

Confirmation bias - You think something, something close to the truth seems to verify it but cause and effect were unrelated and coincidental, or no real link exists at all.

False memories - You see something, you're sure you had a picture in your mind days or weeks ago, but your brain has written over the old thought with some other new thought and now they seem the same to you.

chemical process of recognition misfire - people often call this deja vu. In your brain, along with many other synaptic firings, is a process that happens when you recognize something, or otherwise associate it with something else, and this can misfire at times if there are similar components.

having a sense about what's going to happen "next" or "soon" doesn't require psychic power. much of this happens at a subliminal level as we just glide through life, but some is pretty darn obvious. to convince me of some "psychic" ability you would need to be completed un-associated with the target, the cause and the effect and be able to reliably communicate the result, like if you said "Sven in Norway who is cooking something brown in a skillet is feeling sad today so he is going to call his aunt helga and ask her to make him some lutefisk. She will say no because she just got a new boyfriend and doesn't want to make her house stink". Anything less than every detail of that would not be accepted.

Yeah sure.. than tell me what surprising reality did I get to know yesterday

yes I was in project stargate. no, you probably haven't heard of me.

>holy shit yes to all of these, so much.
congrats you're bipolar lol (most likely but you should probably also get diagnosed). I'm excited for you, once you accept it you are entering a new stage of your life. You should consider this a really positive change because now you can start trying to take control of the direction of your life. Bipolar is like being on a raft in the middle of the ocean and being subject to the changes in current and the waves. Now that you understand what's happening you can begin to control it and actually use it to your advantage.

Yes bipolar 1

The person you grew up knowing as your mother was actually your grandmother.

It's like this- I have a very poignant and random thought out of nowhere, something that kind of 'snaps me out of it'. It being my normal state of mind, my daily routine, etc.
And then usually seconds later something related will happen.

The most interesting one as of late was a terrifying dream about my mom's dead mother which ended with me awake and terrified, staring at two pale hands reaching at my wrist from under my pillow. They receded back into the pillow as I gained full consciousness and I found no trace of anyone in my room, did not sleep that night.

I had never met my grandmother but described her down to every little detail to my mom causing her to break down in tears. "That was her" she said. And two weeks later, my mom's sister was found dead in her apartment. These are the only two things that have ever happened to me that have anything to do with my mom's side of the family, they live quite far away and I don't know any of them. It is not a coincidence and at the time I knew that dream was separate from the aimless fantasies that play through my head on most nights.

People who dismiss it as mania are flat out ignorant. Because it doesn't happen this same way to you, it can't happen to anyone, right?

Anyways no, that is not even an accurate description of mania.

Can anyone confirm this?

If you are legit, could you please tell what awful thing happened in my life several months ago?

I have been diagnosed as bi-polar and this happens to me all the time. No bullshit tonight I went to eat by myself (which I don't normally do) and while eating and taking my sweet ass time I kept thinking of my ex girlfriend of whom I still am in love with. I finished eating, still thinking about her take a step out the door towards my car and I see the exact car she drives. I thought to myself there is no way. Sure enough it was her. Even after months of see each other and ignoring each other when we would see each other she walked over to me crying. Exactly how it was played out in my head. You can try to explain it all you want. But shit is just weird.

no, I'm not going to discuss this because the cycle of it has not finished.

i've had dreams then later on that exact scenario occurs and twice last month i made simpsons references and that exact episode would come on tv that night. it's just weird

So basically you don't know. Give us a hint anyways.

will you be surprised to know it involves a motor cycle?

Some people believe everything happens for a reason and think they are susceptive to have a 6th sense of whats coming, i have seen mostly women doing this. Its bulshit, if you alwasy have "feelings" and one time you happen to be right, that doesnt mean you have some special ability, you just want to feel special and really need to stop thinking you are the reason things happen.

That would be quite surprising because it has nothing to do with that. Then again I am hiding it on purpose.

However, my uncle on my mom's side got in an awful motorcycle accident around that time and is still in a legal battle... interesting. I rate your accuracy 5/10 but your insight seems legitimate.

things are more connected than first impression shows. you're going to find it's not a small world, but a big neighborhood.

Yeah, no. It's not like that at all. It is as if you are electrically shocked into an intrusive and confusing thought pattern, and seconds later something DIRECTLY RELATING to that will occur. It's not like you are constantly having these strange thoughts and it is just cherrypicking and coincidence (for some it surely is). It is actually quite disturbing and confusing sometimes and can be quite accurate. It is not coincidence, it IS a very distinct sense.

>Bipolar is like being on a raft in the middle of the ocean and being subject to the changes in current and the waves.
jesus christ i only recently figured a way to describe how i feel i've lived all these years, and it was exactly this. i even wrote on some wall a verse from a death grips song that began with "harsh winds flay mine flesh to bone" with what you described as currents for me at the time were winds. with these winds hurting me directly as well as indirectly due to them leading me to places or situations which i may not want to be in.
i ended up rationalizing that i have always lacked a proper 'agent' attitude towards life, like i hadn't really ever exerted my will (maybe due to not having one).

i'd like to know what these currents were for you and how did you deal with this? i know it may not be (or have been) the same but your comments have been pretty spot on

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hey, op here. thanks everyone for their input!
part of me obviously knows i’m just being crazy and i’m not psychic lmao, but part of me believes i could be. it’s fucking annoying bouncing from one side to the other constantly.
i don’t want to go on meds simply because my manic phases are what keep me having a will to live.

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thanks ms skeltal. i like your vag btw

of course. happy black history month user!

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Look into reality transurfing & the 4th and 5th densities. YouTube Jessa Reed.

>i ended up rationalizing that i have always lacked a proper 'agent' attitude towards life, like i hadn't really ever exerted my will
I've had this same exact thought and it isn't a good way to look at it. It makes you seem weak, when in reality your will is probably stronger than most people but you are just fighting much stronger currents so you have less control over the direction you sale than people who are sailing on calm waters. But that doesn't mean you're powerless.

>i'd like to know what these currents were for you and how did you deal with this?
One thing I've had to train myself to do is to not believe in any idea too strongly, when you're bipolar you are susceptible to many radical ideas. When depressed you can convince yourself your life is absolutely worthless, you're better off dead, it makes logical sense to kill yourself, but you can't believe these things. When manic you may accept a new set of principals and believe with all your heart you're totally correct and these ideas will change the world whether it be religious, political, philosophical. This is dangerous when manic or depressed. I've resisted this by changing the way I look at life, I learned look at things like an inquisitive child or student kind of, with a healthy amount of skepticism about everything.
Other currents for me are intense obsessions I develop that come and go. Woodworking, firearms, certain games, fictional worlds, time periods, historical figures, cooking, it can really be anything. You just have to learn to balance it with the rest of your life and realize that it's not the end all be all.
The biggest thing you have accept and understand when you're bipolar is that your own thoughts are largely out of your control. I have gone through periods at my job where I start getting really frustrated, I start feeling like my bosses are taking advantage of me, I start thinking they all hate me, I start thinking they're trying to replace me. continued...

youtube.com/watch?v=B6JoLbXfGtY&feature=youtu.be&t=269

Take the James Randi Million Dollar challenge then ya fuck

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narcissism

...continued. I was kind of on a tangent earlier, my thoughts are a bit scattered because I was drinking tonight. But like I was saying you need to accept your thoughts and emotions are largely out of your control and you can't always trust them... I've had time where I've become intensely dissatisfied with work and want to quit. I've had relationship where I start really disliking my partner and thinking I want to dump them. The best thing I've done to counteract this is to not make any rushed decisions at all, like if you feel 100% certain of something, give it a week or a month and see if you still feel that way... you may not.
I also have moments when I'm manic where I'm like HOLY SHIT I need buy this specific thing!!! And if I don't buy it I become fucking obsessed thinking about it... usually I cave and buy it, then a week later I'm like wtf did I buy this for?
Hmm other things you just have to watch out for like making really poor decisions when manic. Like speeding, road rage, binge eating, drugs, sex, financial decisions. if you recognize you're manic you should make and life changing decisions at all.

thanks for the insight my dude, it has been pretty helpful. i should really get to bed since it's 5:30 here but i'm curious as to what you meant in >Now that you understand what's happening you can begin to control it and actually use it to your advantage.
mainly that last bit. was it just a way to phrase it or have you found that being bipolar has given you an advantage in certain situations?

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glad I could be of some help. And yes bipolar can absolutely be an huge advantage sometimes. One obvious example is artists/musicians, when they're manic they can create incredible work that would not have been possible if not manic. Then they're go through depression and really reflect on their life and their work, as well as the world at large... this is where they'll generally get inspiration for their next work.

In terms of average people, you can accomplish incredible things when manic if it's channeled properly. The key is you need to find a job and lifestyle that works for someone who's bipolar. If you have a super mundane job that's the same everyday, that will result in depression and your mania won't have an outlet. Instead find a job where you have changing projects every couple months or so where you can be creative, like an event/party planner or something, there's really tons of jobs like that with changing projects. Every time a new and unique project pops up it'll usually make me manic and I can focus all my energy into in. Then the project's over and I can distress and shut myself down for a few days / weeks. Then when I'm ready I can move onto the next project. You're going to go through cycles like this when bipolar so you need to find a job that accommodates it. A job that is very goal oriented is good, with an opportunity for a break once the goal is achieved. People who are bipolar can thrive with this type of lifestyle, it will mimic your cycles, but first you have to learn about yourself and figure out what your cycles are.

in my case for years I was a classical musician playing in orchestras. We would work on one set of pieces for usually 2 months at a time. I would become obsessed with the pieces and the composers, listen the pieces every day, it would be what my life was about for those 2 months. It gave me a huge advantage over normal people and I became the top of my instrument section in every orchestra I played in, people looked to me as a leader because of how committed I was. Then after the 2 months were over and we finally performed I would be at the height of my mania and it was truly incredible, the concert would be so fulfilling and emotional. Then we would take a few weeks off to decompress before we moved onto the next set / concert. I'm certain many other people in my orchestra were also bipolar, the arts really attract people like us.

Coincidence is not causality.

i'll wait to get diagnosed to see if i really am bipolar but i'll keep everything you've said in mind.
thanks again dude, as a token of my gratitude i'll leave you an ep of a local band i discovered at the apex of my insanity, with sounds that really captured the way i felt (and still sometimes feel)
ima head to bed now, have a good life m8

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well shit forgot link:
youtube.com/watch?v=HpOpSgYM9TQ

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Good night and good luck user, enjoy the journey brother

holy shit I dig this so much, thank you man

>the universe

are you actually retarded? it's like worshipping a fucking rock or the wind

Welcome to the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon, it's common.