Hey Cred Forums, I just tried to shit and most of it just wouldn't come out...

hey Cred Forums, I just tried to shit and most of it just wouldn't come out. Like it's really hard and won't come out at all past my asshole. It really hurt and it's actually making me kinda worried for my health. What should I do?

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enema

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Public enema

Prunes juice

Squat position. Like an Asian smoking and glaring at you with his head tilted.

here are some basic tips for better digestion: cut cheese out of your diet, drink more water especially with meals, take probiotics regularly, start your morning with hot tea, get a prostate exam.

I actually tried this (there's a shelf near my toilet for squatting) and felt a lot of pressure from behind. I think something might be stuck in there :(

Squeeze, then push, rest and repeat. Be prepared for pain. Take your time. Don't bust a gut.
I spent some time in hospital a couple of years ago. Lotsa codein. Eye-watering.

Is there any chance my anus could tear from it though? That's what I'm afraid of.

what did you put in your butt op, be honest

poop

If you can’t get it out of your ass, just put your arm in your asshole and pull the shit out. How the fuck is that hard?

sounds like early stage 1 bowel cancer to me.

Drink coffee and eat garlic you will sht for days

Its stuck, it happens to old people that lose sphincter function, you have to do this thing called “digital” which is essentially using your finger or “digit” to break and loosen up the shit.

update: I have lost the ability to fart.

B

So it finally came out followed by what looked like a trail of mucus. Now I've had mucus in my stool before but never to this extent. Is this some kind of sign?

Stop getting fucked in the ass

For severe constipation, and to reduce risk of hemroids, elevate your legs while on the toilet, like a step stool or something of the such to put you in a squating position. It helps open up your "anal muscles" in summary so that feces slides out easier.

in addition to some of the excellent advice in this topic, can't go wrong with prune juice. it tastes like ass but there's no case of constipation it can't beat

just be careful you don't OVERDO it b/c then you'll have the opposite problem and be stuck on the toilet for hours, with repeat visits. feels good though but damn it's annoying as shit

Dont be suprised if the log is bloody OP

you probably just havent drank enough water. Drink like 2l of water and a litre of prune juice youll shjit like you could delapitate a 3rd world country.

also if youre an alcaholic or drink too much ocffe jsut drink some more of that youll be set

yeah that's just what starts to happen past a point, enjoy your shit adult life

Drink a ton of coffee. Chug that shit

constipated knowledge bro here, i can help you out. first answer these :

- how many days since you haven't shit?
- where does it block exactly? (is there some shit that come out or is it not even pass the sphincter yet)
- what have you tried yet?

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Opiate detox. How long have you taken them? Explains constipation and not enough water being consumed.

OP is full of shit lol.

My diet is horrendous but I rarely have problems because I drink lots of water.

Time to break out the poop sock

Drink water you piece you shit

hey man stop eating processed carbs (bread, cereal) you are eating insolable fibre that is unable to form in the correct manner. eat plenty of fruit and drink plenty of water. seriously stop eating processed foods and eat fruits and vegetables with some fish and meat (stay away from meat until the problem passes). the problems that you will experience is that the waste in your stomach will continue to deteriate inside of you body this will cause harm to the surronding tissues. the condition you will develop is cancer however this is extremely uncommon for people under the ages of 40. the fact that you are eating these foods will most likely cause other complications though.