Okey niggers, i am going to prison soon

Okey niggers, i am going to prison soon.
Any advice?

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Clean your ass. We know you're a pedo

Take some games everyone can play to pass time.

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Clean your anus, I don't think you'll want your future daddies to rape a dirty stinky poo hole.

Tell everyone in there that Leonard Washington says what up, and that he’s happy he made it out.

hope is a dangerous thing, can drive a man insane

Depends on what you're going for. If it's child or rape related, tell no one and hope they never find out. If they don't kill you then you'll get the shit beat out of you. If it's anything else, keep to yourself and don't mess with anyone and don't take favors do favors.

If you're in the US it'll possibly be horrid. If you're in Australia, Europe, or Canada it'll be a little less terrible.

Start lifting weights and eating like a motherfuucker. You need mass now, fat and muscle both.
Have a friend ugly you up the day before you go in. Get him to give you a black eye, not a broken nose cause those suck.
Don't make eye contact with ANYONE for the first 2 weeks in. If you do that means you are a faggot and fair game and things count get rough for you.
Keep your prison wallet clean.
t. nigger

Whats a prison wallet?

Become fleece johnson

This. A true warrior

Ok I’ll bite.
>”why are you going to jail user?”

this roight 'ere, why are you being jailed op

Nothing.
I am innocent.
Bad people just want to ruin my life

must be a dindu

As i said i am innocent.
First they say i stabed some dude but the dude himself said its not true then they said i stole some shit.
Bottom line is they just want me in the box

Ya got a tight little man pussy on ya dont ya. Hhhh it stinks, nice and good

BS.
No answers from you, no answers from us.

Still sounds BS. What country?

Almost
i live in russia

explain the situation that happened that resulted in them wanting to put you in jail. You obviously did something, or were at the scene of a crime. They don't just randomly throw people in prison, I mean, unless you're black.

When you get in, they'll strip you naked with a dozen or so other men and look literally everywhere on your body for contraband. At least that's what it is in much of the US.

I said i was set up by criminals
They wanted me to give them all my savings i refused
So they decided to punish me

If true I’d say you’re fucked.
Let us know what Krokodil is like.

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need more proof or you're just a larping faggot

Homeland of Pushkin

Agreeing on larp.

Russia has corruption issues. The police there aren't exactly honest.

IIRC some prisons in Russia are sort of like work camps.

Why are they singling you out though

I'm not him.

Got a nice lil boy pussy on ya *inhales* ughhh it stinks

I am was anobody. Just your average shmuck with no power or connections.
But i worked hard. Saved money since i was a kid and bought my oyn place to live plus had some extra cash left.
Proffesiobal criminals decided to take it all after they thought i was easy prey.
When all thier abtocs failed after 3 yearsthey decided to go direct. Told me if i dont hand over ounership of my property to them then i am dead. I refused. So they set me up as if i broke the law. Authorities are in cahoots

Could be cold, pack a scarf.
liveleak.com/view?t=zHUC_1581266356

Because criminals asked them nicely
Plus i am nobody. They can do whatever and nobody will defend me

Don't drop the soap

Shit man, that's fucked up. Do you have any firearms to defend yourself? I'd kill those motherfuckers if they tried anything.

Russians don’t say schmuck or cahoots.
I’m outta here

Wax that asshole

I love watching old looney tunes cartoons

Virgin Detected. Stick to dicks faggot.

You must have a really shitty lawyer. Apparently it's guilty until proven innocent.

If you live in a shitty country, just leave. It's not like they're going to chase you for petty shit.

Пoлнaя хyйня, иди poняй мылo, oп.

This is not a new phenomenon.

Great advise thread
Discord gg/WkwJpp

alvays turn your back on the wall and you be aight. good luck

Я нaдeюcь, ты идeшь к Чepнoмy Дeльфинy зa cвoи пpecтyплeния

kak znaesh OP eto rus?

Maybe ease up your use of the word "nigger".

In the USA and if yes, are ou a nigger?

It's where you keep your valuables when you're in prison. Money, drugs, cell phones, etc. My grandad was in a prison camp in Vietnam and he kept his gold watch in his prison wallet for years cause his dad had given it to him and he wanted to give it to his son- my father. The didn't want the gook jailers to find it so prison wallet it was. My grandfather died in that prison camp in Vietnam and his buddy who cared for him so much kept that gold watch in HIS prison wallet for 5 more years until the war ended and he got out, returned to the states, tracked down my dad- his buddies son, and gave him the watch. When my dad died he gave it to me and I still have the watch to this day so thank goodness for prison wallets.

Suck a mean dick.

Run away to Mexico.

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pokemon cards go a long way in prison

Hopper?

Start loosening up your prison purse and learn to make a prison match.

Holy fucking shit nigger
How come you aren’t swimming in bitches with millions made off this soon to be true life story inspired movie?
jk
This is fucking mental regardless

This is a story from a Tarantino movie. Uncultured swine ;)

This. You'll have to spread your cheeks, lift your dick and balls, and pull your foreskin back. It's humiliating, and some places intentionally do it to degrade inmates.

Actually you’re the one who got trolled

Don't drop the soap

this.