Just drinking and checking ppl’s profile pic out and writing haiku based on it

OP is faggot
OP is fucking faggot
OP is faggot

OP here, what do you mean?

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yeah guys OP is gay haha !

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Go learn poetry again

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go back to lit faggot

wings flutter

on a moist petal

rose nectar

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this is a stupid thread i really hate it

Don't engage him. Do what you fucking came here to do. Haiku away!

Burned drooping eyelid
A pavement, shelter for all
Springtime and homeless

Agent UG moved swiftly down the hot Basel streets. The patches of grass next to the old slated church pulsed with tourists, barely contained by the town. He paused to scan ahead. The coat tails of the thief fluttered around the corner and he launched himself towards them. He moved faster than before, past the Institut Architectur, which blended into his peripherals. He caught up. He was fast and it did not take long. He grabbed the thief by the collar and watched as the man became limp for a moment to momentum.

‘Gotcha slut. Cloth off or bar.’

‘No sir, no bar’

‘Cloth off. Jacket first. Pant second. Shoe third.’

The criminal immediately crumbled to the agent’s dominance. He stripped fast, taking no pleasure in the task. UG watched and licked his lips. It pleased him. Neither of them considered the shocked passers-by, politely ignoring the near-naked Filipino’s tight buns. UG released his phone. He livestreamed the bare Asian with perverse intention. His heart fluttered when the viewers came online in their hundreds. The thief was down to his underwear and stared at agent UG, afraid. UG kicked him in the rib and savoured the crunch his steel-tips induced. He got 800 new subscribers and added thousands more dollars to his monthly earnings. The thief was now naked and ashamed, desperately repenting his crime. The nudity tipped the public’s threshold and a muscular middle-aged man tried to intervene. UG ripped off his shirt and forced him to kiss the thief.

‘Ur gay lol’

15,000 viewers now. 5000 comments. ‘No U’ said the fans responding to their idol’s catchphrase. UG reached orgasm and closed his phone.

‘Cloth on. Good boy. No bad again.’

He sprinted off and made his former chase look walking pace. He smirked as a few moments later he arrived at the Agency’s headquarters in Berlin.

‘Ah, UGs we’ve been waiting for you’

Agent UG spun round. Officer Chan smiled at his surprise. UG eyed her Chinese curves. He wanted to yin her yang and she knew it.

‘Wait 4 wat?’, UG asked.

‘We need you to take care of something Agent. Please follow me into my room.’

UG followed her. He was a dog on her leash, she knew in that moment that he would do anything for a 69, and has done everything before. They walked through the Perspex hallway and entered her office. He took a seat on her Vienna chair by the mahogany desk.

‘Wait 4 wat?’ UG demanded an answer.

‘Your impatience is endearing, UG, as is your dedication to the agency.’

‘Wait 4 wat?’ UG asked louder this time.

Chan stared at UG, who stared back. It was a Mexican standoff. There seems to be some strange secret under the veil. Chan’s breasts heaved as her breath got heavier. Something in UG’s cold and dead eyes was intensely appealing to her.

‘Very well UG. HaeMolony has escaped. He was last seen near the Mandarin Oriental, Bangkok. See to him.’

‘Yes’

‘Oh and UG, one more thing’

‘Wat ting?’ UG inquired.

‘When you come back, I won’t be wearing any underwear’

‘Cloth off’

‘No u’

‘All cloth off!’

‘No wait’

‘You off, we fair trade’

‘After the mish UG’

‘Ok, soz for intruppz’