/doag/ still nothing's happening edition

Where was she earlier? Why wasn't she doing anything?

See the previous strip. Apparently the hired security did nothing to stop the fight because "It's Amazi-Girl".

I still can't believe that's the excuse he went with.

I would have preferred they not shot up at all to that.

Yeah, he could have just had them as event staff instead of security.

Bumping for Patreanon.

Patreanon has forsaken us.

That's a good thing.

Their poor soul could only handle so much.

Or we'll just switch to discussing the strip as it's released normally.

But then someone will actually have to go onto the site.

Patreanon literally gives Willis money.

And then takes it before the end of the month. Willis doesn't get a dime.

Plus, we can use Ad Block. There are ways.

...

>Marco Rubio joke

when did he write this again

How much goddamned longer is he going to draw this out?

Y'know, give the guy in Panel 1 a beard and he looks like the guy who's apparently in charge of security, who further looks like Ryan minus his scar.

Also, given how empty the auditorium is, how could anybody have NOT seen or at least heard somebody running through?

Meanwhile, I'm still positive we're heading into buddy-cop territory here.

Approximately three months ago.

Why does he have Robin talk like she's doing a shitty ghetto impersonation?

Holy shit so the joke was dead then too

It's "quirky". Becky talks exactly the same way.

Wouldn't it be just utterly amazing if they were going the wrong way? Like Ryan isn't even in the building anymore, he just climbed out a window and these two idiots don't realize it.

Becky interjects with that and is 18 years old. Robin is using it during a campaign speech and is in her thirties.

Judging from preview panels, we're stuck here until the 21st.

It's probably some Trump thing.
Remember, Robin is now an analogue for Donald Trump for some reason.

He had to make her explicitly Trump as otherwise she'd be Clinton.

Either way, Becky still talks like a goddamn retard.

The rest of his life.

She talked like that in Shortpacked, so I assume it's just a stupid in-universe thing he couldn't bear to drop.

How exactly does Marcie keep her goggles on when they don't have straps? And why would she wear them indoors? She is slowly becoming less human. She has to be becoming a cyborg at this point.

Willis doesn't keep his finger on the pulse of culture the way he seems to think he does.

WHERE THE FUCK IS THE SECRET SERVICE???

That little shit who jumped the barricade at a Trump rally got tackled like 40 ft from the stage.

Robin's just a Congresswoman, not a presidential candidate. That's part of why the Trump comparison is so muddied.

Maybe if he didn't keep a 3 month buffer he wouldn't be finding himself in that sort of mess but it's not like we're his target audience. We don't sit around all day posting gifs of sassy black women

I don't know, but I feel like his target audience is much more culturally aware than Willis is. It's baffling that they haven't picked up on it yet. I mean, it took me a while, but dang. Seriously.

Even if there were people who wised up and thought, deep down, "Hey... this guy isn't actually that good, and his knowledge and portrayal of the struggles minorities face is lackluster at best...", they'd still read and defend it. Because they consider it important to get as many SJW-friendly works out there for the simple sake of numbers.

I've run into similar problems with stuff like Assigned Male. I mean, it's horrible; who thinks it's really ANY good? But if you even suggest it, you'll be accused of transphobia and oppressing minorities and whatever else. And all the while Assigned Male shoots their cause in the foot with how utterly insane it is.

It's pretty much the difference in how shows like South Park can work with ongoing events due to its seven-day production period, while shows like The Simpsons take too long to make for whatever they're parodying to remain relevant.

Boring.

Riley should be getting proper sleep in a bed, not napping at a midnight rally.

You put far too much effort into this post nursery

...

Probably. I just like footnotes.

I appreciate them, user.

This desu. Don't think any harder than the author does. It ain't worth it.

Oh god, I just noticed her there.

No child should have to be dragged to a political rally.

Same. I guess she just got thrown in there because Robin is about ~family values.~

Why is there not way more security around a sitting member of Congress? She wouldn't have the Secret Service but come on!

Remember that Willis is scared of blacks irl so she's only talking how TV has told him they talk.

Do normal members of Congress have personal security without somebody making a threat on their lives?

>xactly

Passing laws that put billions of dollars into defense contracts has a way of getting senators free private police.

whats the deaf girl complaining about?

I think they only have security when they're in the Capitol.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Capitol_Police
thehill.com/capital-living/cover-stories/295415-lawmaker-security

pastebin.com/5MwZPhsE

if they're at a gathering like that there's bound to be some police presence

Oooh, efficiency!

That kills what's left of my soul.

Riley should have her head on Roz's lap.

That would be cute and a nice touch.

Yeah, but where's Becky while all this is going on? Willis is losing sight on what's important.

According to the one cutaway that was absolutely definitely needed, she's sleeping.

Cut to a week of four panel comics of Becky sleeping.

It's not like security can really do anything other than call the police anyway, at least that's the way it is in most states. Cops don't want to have to deal with security hurting people and security companies and whoever contracts them don't want to have to deal with liability so it's almost always a hands-off thing.

Everyone in Congress gets Secret Service. Even prospective candidates can petition for it if they're a big enough player.

It'll be like that one Garfield strip when it was nothing but three panels of sleeping, and then the next day he woke up and was like "You know it's Monday when you wake up and it's Tuesday."

But it'll be Becky sleeping through an entire day in DoA time, which is, like, three to five months in real-world time.

By the way, has anybody noticed how contextually pointless the Sal flashback seems to have become? It has served next to no purpose in the overall story happening right now. If anything, all it did was show that Sal and Marcie were friends in elementary school, and that Sal has always had a bad streak.

That would require Roz being a good sister

For something like this you'd either have two levels of security, one for general purposes and one, probably made up entirely of ex- or off-duty law enforcement, for direct confrontations. Either way there should be several cops on scene to begin with.

I think the context was that Marcie has always had to deal with Sal flying off the handle.

i think it was only there cause willis wanted it to be the first strips in the book.
which is a stupid reason, because everyone reads it on the website, in order, and it doesnt matter how things are arranged in the book.

posted

t. tumblr user

Venues generally have their own in-house security, and prominent visitors (in this case, a US Senator) would have personal security.

Speaking of which: For a US Senator, Robin sure as FUCK has nobody paying attention to her outside of a single college undergraduate newspaper.

She's a Representative and presumably only has one or two terms to her credit.

It's also pretty weird that she seems to be running in primary race instead of a general election.

Even as a Representative, she should have more eyes on her than one college paper.

And I assume she's running in a primary because Willis doesn't understand how elections work outside of the ongoing Presidential election.

Willis has difficulty conveying wider importance to the stupid shit that happens in DoA, like the Toedad incident.

I assume that Willis is just skipping over it since the story is about a bunch of college kids. Then you have to consider the setting. Aside from local news, who else is really going to cover a representative race in Iowa? Especially when the only exciting thing has been a candidate's sister making homemade porn a month ago.

in b4 Willis grows tired of his grounded-in-reality approach to DoA and reveals that the college campus and the surrounding areas are all part of some kind of social experiment or Truman Show concept, and from that point on the main cast tries to escape.

Because that's the only way I can explain the lack of attention to anything that's happened in the comic. People just don't care because they're instructed by WillisGod NOT to care.

>Aside from local news, who else is really going to cover a representative race in Iowa?
That's just the thing: Even local news doesn't seem to care, or else they'd have been at the airport when Robin landed or even at the rally with at least one camera crew on tap.

Is there even any sort of news organization in DoA other than the college paper? Also, does the college paper have a name? I don't want to keep calling it "the college paper".

is she deaf or just mute? sal was talking to her just a few strips ago while they were looking in opposite directions. is this one of those things carried over from a previous universe

Marcie is mute; she used to speak freely, but at some point she stopped for some reason.

It's apparently just a holdover from the Walkyverse where she was actually deaf.

Indiana Daily Student.

Realistically no news organization is going to send a team out to cover a representative landing at an airport to attend a political rally several hours later. Aside from that, the actual joke was that Robin took a plane so she'd look important then landed at a airfield in the middle of nowhere.

Thank you.

And there doesn't necessarily need to be a full team. Just a reporter or two, and one reporter and a cameraman if you work for TV. That's what I mean if/when I refer to a crew or team.

Ultimately what I'm trying to figure out is why somebody with such a prominent role in government is given little to no coverage by even local news organizations. The IDS is even less than local, and yet they're the only ones covering it.

Honestly the idea that Robin would be important at all kinda confuses me. I'm from Alabama and one of our representatives being in town for a political rally would warrant a short piece in the newspaper and a mention on the evening news. They'd have a cameraman at the rally and any anything more in depth would be done prior to the rally or the next day. No one would cover him arriving in town. I could see it if the election was a big deal or there was a scandal.

No news crew showing up when she arrives is a fair point. I'll give you that.

As for scandal, however, there is a thing where Robin's sister Roz somehow got Robin in trouble because she made a sex tape. Because family values, I guess.
And apparently Robin is also being made fun of since she's now a Trump analogy. Small hands and all that shit; I dunno.

Why do you want Riley to get herpes on her mouth?

In-universe it was Roz trying to manufacture a scandal. Why she thought two consenting adults using protection voluntarily releasing homemade porn would be a blow to her sister's career is beyond me. God, Roz is a giant fucking asshole. It's like she's the time-traveling, bastard lovechild of Mary and Carla.

With the way she talks Robin would be a good Palin parody; with the way she acts Robin would be a good Clinton parody.

>God, Roz is a giant fucking asshole.
Well, who isn't an asshole anymore? Even Joyce, once the only remaining bastion of hope in DoA, is turning to the dark side of the moon.

>With the way she talks Robin would be a good Palin parody; with the way she acts Robin would be a good Clinton parody.

And now WillisGod is trying to make her a Trump parody. I can only assume Willis just makes her an analogue for whichever politician is/was most trendy to insult at the moment/three months ago.

Ethan and Danny remain perfectly milquetoast and bland. Dina is at worst testy.

I think Robin was originally envisioned as a stock sleazy politician with a bit of Palin for flavor. It's only coincidental that Clinton happens to be a stock sleazy politician and he had to do something drastic to cover for it.

>Ethan and Danny remain perfectly milquetoast and bland. Dina is at worst testy.

Dina's been getting worse lately. It seems Willis equates character development with "becoming an asshole".

I'm pretty sure the last time Dina did anything remotely assholish was when she got a burn in on Sarah for being cynical and pessimistic.

Wasn't that like, the last time she appeared? During that group hug?

Either that or sneaking into Ruth's room at the medical center.

>Aaron Stack
MACHINE MAN CONFIRMED WHO HYPE FOR ALCOHOLIC MISANTHROPIC BEEP BOOP ROBO

Either way, I can't see Willis taking her any other way than into an asshole. Nobody in DoA develops, they just become bigger assholes.

>Dispel
Shouldn't that be "dispense"?

New Willis crossover event, House of Mike. Later followed by Age of Carla. Rounding it out will be Secret Drama, where a patchwork planet of Willisverse realities are ruled over by God Queen Roz.

>ruled over by God Queen Roz.
Implying Willis wouldnt make Becky the God Queen.

In this scenario Becky would be the Reed Richards equivalent.

...

oh boi here we go.

And that's about the last of the truth or dare strips, time to get back on track.

Justify your text.

What the fuck is going on in the first panel? Is that green blob supposed to be a bottle?

So with no talent whatsoever, all you do is "make fun" of other work?

Is the triangle mouth new or am I just now noticing it?

It has been four minutes past the hour and Patreanon is not here.

Obviously, Marcie stared him to death in the last strip.
That's a good thing.

Yes that's his gimmick, he parodies Willis despite being an even worse artist and writer

I think I put it in a few strips before this one.

I'll probably have a strip or two making fun of it when I have the opportunity.

>he parodies Willis despite being an even worse artist and writer

Dewd's stuff isn't great, but Willis is a way worse writer. Dewd is at least a little self aware as compared to Willis who is trapped in his own little la-la-lesbian-land.

Who cares, I was busy watching the World Peace season finale. (It was great)

I'm still surprised that show wasn't cancelled after a few episodes. Doesn't [as] know that they have a known racist, rapist, and renowned serial killer on that series?

Coldfusion, hop off Dewd's dick. The kid needs to git gud or kill himself because he lacks any talent.

Patreanon here, got the goods.
Nice work Dewd.

Oh and before we get the idiots asking how the fuck Amber knew where Rapey McRape was, last strip she asked for Sal's phone, so she most likely tracked hers that way.

Of course that just means that Sal now has the power to track Amber wherever she goes.

And once again, we see that Willis has no sense of 3D perspective.

Where, exactly, is Amber leaping in from? It looks like she's kicking him in the ear, but he's falling like she kicked him in the back.

Sorry yeah she's mute, it's called a selective mute (since it doesn't seem to be necessary).

What's she upset about?

Is she, like, hovering in the air or something? What the hell is going on with that perspective?

Oh fuck off. If Amber is tracking Ryan with Sal's phone, it's Willis's job to show us that. Stop apologizing for him being lazy

Imagine if this was animated

Do you think it would be better or worse than the CAD show

This has me thinking worse

It amazes me that Willis will bother to go out and actually get references for the areas he's drawing this comic in, but can't into basic human anatomy.

I mean, look at her fucking feet there.

Remember, this is directly following .
If I understand the map correctly, what's going on here is that Amber took Sal's phone for seemingly no reason[a], ran out of the back of the theater, and managed to catch up to Ryan despite him being far enough away to have escaped their sight after they had entered the theater before.

Also, she managed to catch up and perform a flying kick in the face, despite lacking anywhere to leap from.

Also,
>KRABOOF!

Also, thanks to the porn comics, those speed lines make me think that somebody just orgasmed.

Also, I feel like anybody running with two phones would have pocketed one of them.

[a] - I assume the reason will be revealed in a later strip, but Willis could have done some foreshadowing other than "Give me your phone."

What you said, pretty much. Amber could have said "I have an idea" and that would be enough.

The CAD show was probably animated in Flash.
I imagine DoA:TAS would be a lot more jerky in its approach to keyframing.

That's because he all but traces from references. Give me a minute and I'll find an example.

You got a minute

Well, it's not traced directly from the original photo, but he's only drawing from the one angle without being creative and going for an alternate angle. I believe in the panels after this one, he just goes for blank/generic shots where you can't actually see any other buildings in the background.

Give me five more to dredge up the strip.

Here it is.

As you can see, Willis draws the site from one angle, then either copies and pastes it (See ) or hides it by switching to a generic angle (Pic related).

So when we were saying this is too drawn out, I didn't think he was going to immediately cut to the resolution like that.

There's no flow between this and the last comic. Was the only reason they ran through the auditorium so Willis could make a joke with Robin? What does Amber taking Sal's phone have to do with anything? HOW DID SHE CATCH UP THAT FAST?

Is he making this up on the fly or something? None of this story fits together at all.

I hate that I feel obliged to take Wormface's side simply because I know Willy's Tard Brigade are braying in triumph over the white cis guy getting what's coming to him.

I can only imagine the essays that Cerberass is writing regarding how the angle of Tubby's kick reflects perfect karma and symbolism regarding rapists, or something.

>Is he making this up on the fly or something
yes
he makes these months in advance, but when he does he literally just writes them off the top of his head and then draws like five at once and usually never edits them again

>Is he making this up on the fly or something? None of this story fits together at all.

You know, he's said multiple times that he can write college drama in his sleep, but I think around two years ago he honestly burned up most of his ideas and has had to actually start trying to write a story again. Except unlike It's Walky where there was a story with jokes mixed in, he had been doing Shortpacked! for the longest time before heading to do DoA.

I honestly think he misses not being able to just have a set location and have his characters make jokes about toys anymore.

Better animated for the talking and normal activities, worse when doing shit like this.

Amber should have been directly behind Ryan as they exited the same building. Even if they exited through different doors she wouldn't need to cross the street to reach him. The strip would have worked a lot better if Amber was following and kept closing the distance without Ryan noticing.

And Amber probably did orgasm, she probably orgasms every she beats the shit out of someone. Just a little one though, enough to take the edge off but not enough to really satisfy.

I almost feel like Willis writes moments and not scenes.

For example:
is the moment where: Amber and Sal run after Ryan and Marcie gets mad about it.
is the moment where: Amber and Sal run through an auditorium where Robin is rehearsing.
is the moment where: Amber catches up to Ryan and kicks him in the face.

Willis decompresses the story when he should be compressing it, and compresses the action when he should be letting it flow naturally. He lets the dialogue take precedence over the action, and as a result you have scenes where Amber and Sal have a casual conversation while Ryan literally walks away.

And on another note, Willis still can't figure out how to write for binge readers and daily readers. But that requires more autistic research, and I'm too lazy to do it right now.

>The strip would have worked a lot better if Amber was following and kept closing the distance without Ryan noticing.
That's why a few of us are guessing that Amber is using Sal's phone to track her own phone, which would then lead them to Ryan. The problem is that we didn't see that happening, nor were we given a sign of that being the case.

>Just a little one though, enough to take the edge off but not enough to really satisfy.
So what you're saying is that after this, she's going to make passionate rape-love to Sal on top of Ryan's unconscious body.

Even if she's tracking Ryan through her phone she shouldn't have needed to cross the street to kick him.

And yes, violent, rapey hatesex with Sal.
I know hatefucking ships are basic bitch tier, but goddamn if violent, brutal lezdom don't get my dick twitching something fierce.

For all the work that Willis has done in using real locations for his comic, he sure as hell can't manage to actually map out paths taken by characters.

I'm still hoping for Sal to cuck Amber by organizing a thresome between her, Danny, and Ethan.

Man, Amazigirl and Sal hatefucking sounds pretty cool. At least that's better justification for why the bad guy always gets away. Well, not better but I'd be willing to overlook the incompetence. Though the thought of a race bent amazi-girl is hilarious.

you're not the only one mang. kinda wanna draw it, myself

If you want to draw it, go ahead. Be the change you want to see in the world.

DannyxSalxEthan seems more suited for a lighthearted or ribald thing than NTR.

>In which violence *is* the answer.

I have to admit, it was worth the wait.
I love watching rapists get kicked.

I wonder what are the chances that Ryan kept video or pics of his rapings on his phone?

It is nice to have smut on your phone.
And if he's anything like me he probably likes to take souvenir photos. It's just so handy when it's easily available.
I'd say there's a 50% chance.

Given Willis' penchant for tragic drama, I bet he thinks the doujins where a woman is blackmailed into performing sexual acts after being recorded being forced to partake in sexual acts against her will

is based on documented scientific evidence.

>Tubby gets his phone
>Looks through his pics
>Dozens of girls in compromising positions
>Many taken after the Joyce incident
>Amazigut realizes she could have stopped it earlier

Too hardcore for Willy though.

>Amber gets his phone
>Looks through his pics
>They're all pics of him doing charity work and volunteering
>Amber realized they're going to have to frame him to get any real evidence
>Four month long story arc about Amber and Sal trying to stage fake rape pics while plagued by comical mishaps

>Four month long story arc about Amber and Sal trying to stage fake rape pics while plagued by comical mishaps

Lord, this would be the best in the hands of a competent writer.

>Eventually they give up and roofie Joyce then toss a naked, unconscious Ryan on top of her before calling the cops

It's not like he needs to put that much effort into this. We've already seen Roofieman's Modus Operandi.

If you hate him so much, then you're a pussy for not just filtering his tripcode.

This beats the snot out of the rivals-team-up cliche he's been working with.

I hate to agree, but yeah.

>evidence is seized illegally and thus inadmissable in court
>everyone now realizes Amber is a goddamn moron

So Willis' flanderising is to make everyone cynical assholes?

>Willis is a way worse writer
This is one of the very few instances in all of webcomics where you're actually wrong. Dewd is LITERALLY cancer incarnate and /doag/ would be better off if he were just dead in real life.

someone edit it so she's doing an RKO. OUTTA NOWHERE!

I dont see how Amber could have caught up with him so easily

Also, he should have just taken out the phones memory card and ditched the phone early on

>Dewd is at least a little self aware
No.

>I almost feel like Willis writes moments and not scenes
Yeah, no shit. I realized this about a year ago. Willis is a big fan of spots versus whole scenes. He doesn't care if the scene overall is any good as long as there's that one spot in it where a character TOTALLY GOES OFF on another or someone gets beat up. It might be a holdover from writing gag-a-day strips for so long, in a way those moments are like punchlines.

oh she is a superhero, she used her ability to sucker punch him from outside the last panel so she didn't have to chase him

That is what life did to him so he thinks it's normal probably.

The exclusionary rule only applies to cops, not private citizens.

Good to know. But it would still be seen as sketchy, at the very least.

I should have seen it, but I guess it required more time. Or I'm just stupid.

Either way, it's a smaller version of a fault when writing screenplays or other scripts. Sometimes writers get caught up in writing different scenes in a story that they don't actually write in how those scenes connect, so when a movie has to jump from the main character rescuing a prostitute from being beaten up by a pimp to burning down the pimp's home, it just jumps from one scene to the next without investigating exactly how the main character learned where he lived or if there were any difficulties in getting there.

I suppose a real-world example would be every plot-point in "The Room" that gets dropped. Tommy Wiseau wrote scenes like Denny being confronted by a drug dealer, figured that was enough, and then dropped it. Also, the whole breast cancer thing.

Not really. It creates probable cause for further investigation.

>o when a movie has to jump from the main character rescuing a prostitute from being beaten up by a pimp to burning down the pimp's home, it just jumps from one scene to the next without investigating exactly how the main character learned where he lived or if there were any difficulties in getting there

Those jump cuts can be perfectly valid as long as setup is done beforehand.

Wow Joyce really grew herself a nice pair of honkers. I want to not think through putting a baby in her load bearing hips.

>I want to not think through putting a baby in her load bearing hips.

I'm confused.

>Those jump cuts can be perfectly valid as long as setup is done beforehand.
That's true. I should have used a more blatant example.

Actually, the best example would be the last two DoA strips, jumping from the auditorium to Ryan in the street. Why didn't I say that before?

He means that he has a Why Boner over filling Joyce with his Jesus juice.

>He means that he has a Why Boner over filling Joyce with his Jesus juice.

That's what's confusing me. She's a perky, girl-next-door type with a nice set of sweater puppies and hips and ass thick as a bowl of oatmeal, why wouldn't you want to marry and have three kids and a house in the suburbs with her?

Jumping from the auditorium to the street isn't a good example either, because we already know that Ryan was trying to escape from Amber and Sal. The best example would be the flying kick out of nowhere, as not only was it established that Sal and Amber were a significant distance behind him but that the angle of attack was completely wrong for someone chasing after another.

Confusion is only natural after thinking that going in raw on a Christian's danger day was a good idea.

Not shame though. Never shame.

Holy shit, just filter his fucking tripcode instead of filling every thread with your bitching about him, you fucking autists.

Shut up.

>selective mutism
But the internet is telling that selective mutes have social anxiety and fear situations where they need to speak, it's not the speaking itself that terrifies them. Godamnit Willis, your characters don't hold up to a 10-second google search

Just ignore them. Anytime a drawfag shows up and doesn't pander to their faggoty needs they always say they're shit.

Because they're faggots.

Big gay faggots.

>defending the dewd
holy shit

I bet you like steamed carrots don't you fucboi.

First panel, profile view while running, in the second panel again, in the third panel he is running at us and in the third one he falls as he had been kick on the back despite looking as if it was at his head.

And where did she jump from? How come he didn't see her?

Wow, this guy is just shitty as a comic artist, it gives me hope that I can make a webcomic with a fanbase someday

steaming the carrots makes the vitamin A more absorbable, if you eat raw carrots you are LITERALLY depriving yourself of nutrients

> He intakes so few nutrients he has to literally scrape them from anywhere

Depends on the person. If something particularly traumatizing happens, sometimes, a person can lose one of their senses or something else. If you see something you can't unsee, it is literally possible for the trauma to remove your ability to see. It's not that common, but it's likely something along those lines that happened to Marcie.

Are ew gonna seen Annabreth in lewd lengerie

We should petition the dewd to do lewd comics

Hey, they can't be worse than Willis's

#dewdlewds

Get the dewd on Hilloli project

Any trauma that severe would have other repercussions and would result in Marcie having extensive psychological treatment. The most realistic answer is that she suffered a neurological or physiological problem that removed her ability to speak.

Dewd has drawn porn before. It is as terrible as his regular comics.

>And where did she jump from?

Sal threw her.

The image of Sal carrying Amber like Adam West's Batman carrying a bomb has made everything better

Yes, and then some.

Still though, she not only caught up with him but was able to pull ahead enough to either A: Come at him from the side which means she had to run a LOT farther then turn back, or B. Ambush, which means she moved even faster.

Her running him down cause she knew where he was is one thing, but unless this idiot has been running around one or two buildings or stayed stationary for a long time this is bullshit for that reason as well.

I was imagining Sal laid out on the ground with a hernia after give Amber the fastball special.

I'm pretty sure when Sal and Amber do it, it's called a screwball special.

This is a great idea.

> KRABOOF
And with that, yet another count of assault. Amazing. Truly amazing.

You know what's really great? All of these "free" interns likely have politically-connected family. You don't work on a Congressman's campaign without someone who knows someone. You really think someone's going to see their 18-something son get suckerpunched by a belligerent superhero and a BIKER CHICK BLACK CHICK WHO IS BLACK and not press charges?

I wonder if Amber understands half of the shit she's doing could easily mean a warrant issued for her arrest. The next time she sees a cop, even fleeing the scene will just make it worse.

Holy shit, if only Willis were competent, this would be incredible.

>All of these "free" interns likely have politically-connected family.

Not really. Most political campaigns function on numerous volunteers and interns who have no more connections than any other random person. Dude was handing out signs, not the chief of staff's personal assistant.

> Analyzing the realism of a comic
You guys truly are, the dumbing of this age(tm).

The presented realism of a comic is a valid complaint based on the professed realism of the comic.

Also get that pointlessly depressing shit out of here.

Don't listen to post more of these.

It was the weakest concept out of them all. "Joyce is stuck in a terrible relationship and completely miserable but everything could be solved by sitting down and talking to each other like adults except they don't" is a terrible setup for what was originally ideas about cheesecake. Weeb Mary whose husband is sci-fi author was better.

> Their problems can be solved with a thoughtful discussion
AHAHAHA. You're cute.

If I'm going to read fanfic about a hormone addled, sex starved, heavily pregnant Joyce I sure as hell don't want to read about tension between her and Carol over her relationship status.

Oh? So you'd rather enjoy a hormone addled, sex starved, heavily pregnant Joyce enjoy her """"marriage"""" ""with"" """"""her"""""" """"""""man""""""""?

I just want some lewds goddamn it.

Alright shit's starting to climax.

...

is tycho about to get FUCKED up?

Part of me really wants Super Duper Girl to wake up long enough to stumble into the restroom half naked, collapse on a pantsless Tych-Tyler, then puke and soil herself.

Is this bad on purpose?

Is it on purpose if he just refuses to improve himself?

no, then he's just inflating his post count.

no need to blow this out of proportion, right?

*insert another dobson joke*

Sometimes I wish Willis was as thin-skinned as Dobson.

Would inflation make the comic better or worse?

Considering the nature of the comic, it'd be weight gain instead of inflation.

Yeah, if he pulls that crap with making Malaya gain weight overnight again in this comic, I'm going to be fairly annoyed.

Wasn't the context of that due to Malaya dating Ultracar?

No, it was because she turned 23, and that's when a woman's metabolism magically slows down so that you gain like 20 pounds overnight. There was literally a little metabolism bar thing and everything. It wasn't the dumbest storyline, but it was pretty bad.

no, Willis was just horny and wanted another short stack

Implying he isn't. Willis throws a temper tantrum at even the kindest, most constructive criticism.

The way he treats his fans is not too different from the way he treats his enemies. It's kind of sad.

There's little difference between his fans and his enemies these days. Just look at us.

I'm not a fan of Willis, I'm a fan of these threads and everyone in them. Even Dewd, bless his heart.

The difference is we don't sit and take it like a bunch of bitches, lest we be banned by God King Willis, who will then go to brag about it on Twitter

No, but don't be surprised when he tries to pretend it is. Dewd is one of the biggest retards to ever post on Cred Forums.

Here's hoping that he doesn't add any more now.

Willis can't make new characters to save his life, so he'll probably fatten an existing one up again.

At the least, Shortpacked was absolutely never a grounded comic.

Though DoA professes to be, so such things wouldn't work as well here. Not that that'd stop him.

This I gotta see.
Can somebody post links or pictures or something while we wait for Patreanon?

>get back from House of Hardcore where I might have just witnessed the Honest to God Final, Real, 100% Genuine Actually Legit Retirement of Terry Funk (Which I might be a source for in Dave Meltzer's writeup) as well as appreciate the insanity that is Broken Matt Hardy

>Just in time for Patreanon to present me with tonight's big steaming turd

I have had one hell of a night lads

It won't stop him.

For a comic that advertises itself as grounded in reality, we've gotten a ton of cartoon bullshit.

>physics defying car chase
>vigilantes
>house invasion heist
>gun toting evangelical who talks like he's from medieval times
>Rube Goldberg machine
>goofy quirky lesbian Jar Jar Binks
>an evil scar faced rapist having a group of identical minions at his beck and call,
>Looney Tunes antics between a roller blading tranny and a christian female Squidward.
>Girl who can literally fucking teleport.

And absolutely none of the above was done in an interesting to read fashion.

It's literally an entire Willis chapter.

shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1746

I don't think Joyce, Becky, and Josh breaking into Becky's house really counts as cartoonish. Stupid but not cartoonish.

That one's more unbelievable than cartoonish. It did kinda feel like a caper more than anything.

Wow, that was stupid.
Is Willis' wife even a shortstack?

She looks like a male Willy.

Then, is Willis a shortstack?

He's an abomination

he's short and fat, so.....?

...

but...that is a straw man...

my head

>2013
They say that the modern wave of SJW-types dates back to 2011 and possibly earlier.

I wonder if you can find examples of it in "Shortpacked". Well, other than the Starfire comic.

Could you define
>modern wave of SJW-type

>Willis made two comics bitching about people criticizing his use of strawmen,
>both times accusing them of not knowing what a strawman is.
>Willis himself has no idea what a strawman is.

I'm glad he ended Shortpacked, because after a while it became his vessel to "stick it to the haters" and it was the most annoying, obnoxious, CWC-esque thing.

>modern wave of SJW-type

When the voice of insanity was treated as relevant, I would guess.

don't forget sticking it to people who rightfully called his obsessions unhealthy.

Here you go, kid.

>modern wave
SJW-types have always been around. The definitions of political correctness have simply expanded from what they were in the past. What the 90s decreed to be safe for families of all ages has expanded to inclusion and tolerance for people of all ages, races, and sexualities.

>SJW-types
That's just how I refer to them. It's fancier than just saying "SJWs".

We await the day that DoA becomes nothing more than Willis' personal soapbox, though given the double whammy of reintroducing Ryan after the Brock Turner case as well as literally making Robin act like Donald Trump, it's becoming more and more like it was.

>Questionable Content
I wonder if Jeph even considers Willis a friend.

Is there any reason why this strip is set in the QC universe?

That's still rather vague.

jeph and willis have done guest comics for each other over the years. They at least are cordial, though talk behind each other's back about how the other is a sexist cis shitlord, I'm assuming

because it's a FUNNY REFERENCE!

also, somehow JJ does trans characters better than willis.

how the fuck is that even possible?

See I loved this back then because I didn't get that Willis thought these WEREN'T massive character flaws for Ethan and were sympathetic traits. He had accidentally made a flawed yet sympathetic protagonist that was really really good, only he killed it by having the narrative mold to ultimately vindicate Ethan and act like his flaws aren't flaws at all.

Almost an hour and Patreanon has failed to deliver the "goods".

Clearly, this means he has finally passed from this mortal coil and escaped Mr. Bones' Willis Ride.

the problem is that ethan basically became willis. any traits seen as negative on ethan mean they're bad.

willis is under the impression that one person's addictions being worse than yours means you don't have a problem.

Back when DoA first started, I liked that it wasn't the constant SJW strawman defeating bullshit Shortpacked was.
It's now a goddamned hellhole of political correctness gone wrong from the mind of a deranged idiot, but at least he's not making comics to mock specific, real life people he disagrees with anymore. Yet.

You make this same post every night.

did you forget the strip he made to call out how his fans for being women-haters when they didn't know the specific parts of a vibrator?

Y'know, when you think about it, this story with Ethan and Drew is a semi-perfect way of explaining hugbox mentality.

>he's not making comics to mock specific, real life people he disagrees with anymore. Yet.
Again, I must point out how Robin is literally spouting Trump memes, like having small hands and making America great again.

And if Willis' three-month buffer is to be assumed, it was three months ago that Brock Turner made headlines for getting off with his alleged rape charge.

I foresee the December or January story of DoA to involve some kind of a bomb going off on campus.

>You make this same post every night.
Only when Patreanon is late.

>he's not making comics to mock specific, real life people he disagrees with anymore.
did you miss the robin/trump analogy?

or this?
remember when we derailed a thread after someone brought that page up and talked about the good sex education comic willis was 'paying homage' to?

I didn't forget. That was a Shortpacked strip with a DoA version of a character.

I meant more along the lines of people he's had actual interactions with.

the worst part is "Oh Joy Sex Toy" isn't even that good at teaching sex lessons.
It's just when compared to Willis literally shaming his followers for not knowing sex toy parts that it looks good.

Again, him yelling about clitoral stimulation to a bunch of highschool students when the man didn't touch himself until he was 19

>remember when we derailed a thread after someone brought that page up and talked about the good sex education comic willis was 'paying homage' to?
Yeah. I remember jokingly commenting on one of those strips that talked about consent. Something along the lines of "man sex must be really boring if you're constantly asking for consent every ten seconds"
The amount of people who crawled out of the woodwork to call me a hopeless virgin loser was kinda astounding.

because it's a stupid thing to say.

>i don't understand joke

>I meant more along the lines of people he's had actual interactions with.
Oh, my bad.

In that case, I too fear that he's going to fall into his old trends and make strawmen characters again.

I believe OJST is less about sexuality and more about sex toys in general.
But the kicker was how Willis was paying homage to OJST in his strip where he essentially shamed his readers for not knowing what part of a vibrator looked like, when OJST itself does everything it can to keep people from feeling any shame or discomfort.

It's almost hilarious. I wonder if the people behind OJST ever learned about it.

indeed. the point of a joke is that it be funny.

Why would you want to have sex with someone who doesn't seem comfortable with it? How is that enjoyable for either of you?

Why would you intentionally misinterpret a joke?

The difference is Oh Joy Sex Toy doesn't blame its readers for not knowing the things it's teaching.

Willis called everyone who didn't know what a peg on a vibrator was a woman hating idiot in the smuggest fucking way imaginable. This from a guy who didn't masturbate until he was 21 because he thought his dead grandma would watch him do it from Heaven and puked after drawing his first porn comic.

Willis is completely incapable of doing anything sincerely. Everything he does always out of some degree of spite.

You can't go announcing patreanon's death every time he sleeps in

>"Hey want to have sex?"
>"Yeah!"
>Start revving her up
>"You still want to have sex?"
>"Yeah, sure!"
>Get fucking, 10 thrusts in:
>"Hey, you still want to have sex?"
>"...yes."
>Another 10 thrusts
>"Are you still willing to have sex with me?"
>"I'm having second thoughts."

I suppose. Still, it's good to think that he's managed to escape what we cannot.

I think he's on vacation right now or something. Visiting somewhere, at least.

>I think he's on vacation right now

Who does he think he is?

Yes, actually. It sounds unbelievable, but this does happen.

He's stronger than the rest of us.

Truly, user, we are The Rest of Us.

Do I have to post this comic every night?

>It sounds unbelievable, but this does happen.
Like I said. Sex must be a really boring thing with you.
You may not realize this, but humans have these great things called non-verbal cues. There is also more than one way of asking a question, being extremely clinical is not always the best way to ask something

Sounds like a comedic follow-up to that game with the zombies that aren't zombies but are actually zombies.

Yes, because it's hilarious.

The last panel keeps making me think of a Se7en parody.

Which one? Metal Gear Survive?

The Last of Us

I'd rather be embarrassed and self-conscious if it meant that I knew I wasn't sexually assaulting/raping someone.

No, I know that. The joke was that Metal Gear Survive also features zombies who aren't zombies but are totally zombies.
I think that other game that was revealed at E3 is going to be of the same kind of not-zombies cloth.

That's why you have to compromise. Instead of explicitly asking for consent, you have to be like "Yeah, you like that?" and "Yeah, babe, say my name if you want more" and "You want it in the ass tonight?" or other variants.

Compromise, yo.

Are you so incapable of reading human emotions that you can't tell if you're raping someone unless you ask?
What the fuck?

Huh, for someone who pays such attention to vidya, I should pay more attention to vidya.

>The Rest of Us
>Following the story of Gary and Norman, who unwittingly follow in the footsteps of Ellie and Joel
>As Joel is capering through the military settlement, Gary and Norman are getting beat by soldiers for violating power conservation playing their Wii all night
>As Joel and Ellie are cavorting about the cannibal camp, Gary and Norman are helping themselves to scrumptious "pork" chili

I haven't played enough to really go into depth with this

If you don't know someone very well, and you think things might turn ugly if you tell them no or change your mind, you might not say anything. Asking for consent lets them know that you care about them and are willing to respect their limits.

Ironically, as you interrupt the fuck session every couple seconds to ask consent, the girl loses interest and doesn't want to have sex anymore, thereby making the session, for all intents and purposes, a rape.

>Please ma'am if you could just sign this consent form before we begin, it will guarantee a safe and enjoyable encounter for both parties

What kind of sex are you guys having where the girl immediately loses interest if you stop or do something stupid for one second?

>Excuse me ma'am just checking in. Are you still consenting to have my penis enter your vagina?

Verbal agreements are fine. This isn't a court case.

Seriously, what's so strange about making sure everyone's having a good time?

There are alternatives though. Like let the person know they can say stop whenever they want or use a safeword. Asking for consent repeatedly is just a mood-killer and also kind of insulting the more I think about it.

Like who should be asking who? Is there a gender dynamic? What about gay sex? Lesbians?

>Seriously, what's so strange about making sure everyone's having a good time?
There's nothing strange about it dickweed. But generally people do it without needing to stop and ask for consent in the most clinical and boring way possible

Are you retarded?

I'm making fun of the idea that you interrupt your pity fuck every few moments to ask "DO YOU WANT TO HAVE INTERCOURSE???", thereby ruining the mood and making her lose interest.

Have you ever had a normal fuck before or do I got a nice stainless steel hook stuck in my gums?

I do have a problem reading people and to top it all off buttsex makes it easy to confuse pleasure and pain coming from the reciever so even normies have a hard time with that.

Anal is for disgusting degenerates anyway so who cares?

You don't just keep asking regardless. Sex is a confusing, constantly changing thing that can go from good to bad in an instant, and if you don't know if she's okay with where this is going you should probably ask before you make a mistake.

>not wanting to have degenerate sex
I bet you eat dry toast, faggot

I bet you kiss girls, gayboy

For someone who hates anal you sure do have a stick lodged up in your ass.

>Pardon me ma'am. I'm just going to kiss your neck for a little bit, is that acceptable with you?

That's exactly what I'm talking about. You don't want to run into a limit that you didn't know was there.

So after leading him on, getting through foreplay, taking off their clothes, whatever further foreplay, and getting into the act, the girl loses her nerve and just stays quiet while the man unwittingly "rapes" her.

What a bitch.

You really haven't had sex, have you?

If he wants to have doggy and she doesn't, or wants to stick it in pooper and she's not up for it, than, like an actual normal girl, verbally or nonverbally indicates that she would rather not or wants to do something else.

If he goes ahead with it, then there's a problem. If she just shuts up while he does his thing, only to cry about it afterward, than that's her problem. "I was afraid he'd rape me, so I let him rape me" is a retarded excuse.

You really aren't convincing me that you aren't the most boring sex partner in the world

>SJW-types have always been around. The definitions of political correctness have simply expanded from what they were in the past. What the 90s decreed to be safe for families of all ages has expanded to inclusion and tolerance for people of all ages, races, and sexualities.
And what's wrong with that exactly? I mean it's pandering but it's not hurting anybody.

If there's a chance he might beat the shit out of her, then yes, she'd stay silent. Is that so hard to believe?

>leading him on
Oh come the fuck on. If she wants to stop, she wants to stop, end of discussion. If you think you're "owed" sex after a certain point no matter what she says or feels, then why are you even pretending you care about consent?

We're talking about people who seem to think it's normal to actually START HAVING SEX and interrupting it every few moments to once again ask for consent.

I don't think you're on the same page, because that is in no way normal behavior. It'd also be somewhat weird and a bit autistic during foreplay as well, since it shows a certain inability to pay attention to body language and read nonverbal cues, but that's not specifically what was being discussed.

>Oh come the fuck on. If she wants to stop, she wants to stop, end of discussion
Way to completely misinterpret what user said, mate

eh. I could be wording my argument wrong, but I think in general erring on the side of caution is a good idea. Be weird now, avoid rape/assault charges later.

How so?

>I wonder if Jeph even considers Willis a friend.
They'll probably take what they can get.

>women is completely consensual up to a certain point
>doesn't say anything to indicate she's no longer consenting, and presumably doesn't indicate this through body language either
>somehow it is the man's fault she had sex against her will

Unfortunately, that is exactly how it works. A lot of the time women are afraid to stop sex for fear that the guy will explode at them.

can patreanon show up so this discussion will stop

Well I guess I am capable of viewing women as human beings with their own agency
My bad

So am I. That's why I ask.

Goddammit, this is exactly why Patreanon can't go on vacation. This is the bullshit we get into when we run out of comic to insult

>I definitely think women have agency, that's why I coddle them every step of the way

Anyone got a dollar or something they can scam Willis out of so we can shut this discussion up?

Might be a good idea to have a backup patreanon anyway. I remember we had two until one quit.

I'm having a hard time picturing the context for these scenes you seem to be basing these hypotheticals on.

I feel like you're basing it on like, Japanese porn where the man just goes up and gropes some girl while she whimpers without really protesting.

They're not hypotheticals. I know people who've gone through this. It's a problem.

Not every 2-bit user has the courage and heroism to become... PATREANON!

Yes but you're giving no context for any of this.

Nobody's condoning somebody pushing on without consent here (which should be a given, but without it accusations of "rape apologists" would readily fly...) but sexual situations are full of nuance and contextual details that can make all the difference.

>nuance and contextual details
We've already established namefag here doesn't understand how body language and other non-verbal cues work

>Some days you just can't get rid of a psychotic!

To give you credit here, I wish I'd been asked about a lot of stuff before it happened with the biggest piece of crap I'd ever met. Just going for it with someone you've never been intimate with before... it's good to learn your boundaries as soon as possible. Then, if you change your mind, you can let the other person know. I was more able to set limits with the next boyfriend because I was emotionally damaged by the one who never gave me a chance to breathe. There's obviously a lot more to it than that, but I think if it's the first time you're doing something with someone, just ask. You can whisper it in their ear or nuzzle them when you do it. There are ways. I'd rather be asked than not, when it comes to any kind of first time.

You people are scum and do not deserve this
j/k I luv u

>he got in before the screen lock

Is this real.

>Amber takes picture of guy right in front of him, prepares to upload it and shit
>Drops phone in scuffle
>Guy picks it up
>Phone hasn't locked yet

I mean, it's not *that* farfetched.

Willis is going to drag this out until we kill ourselves, isn't he?

did they get hit by the car or is sal yanking him out of the way
we were promised no one gets hit by cars

We were promised no death.

Why wouldn't a geek like Amber have her screen lock immediately?

Idiocy.

Insanity.

Plot convenience.

How weak is this guy?

I mean it's probably because Willis doesn't know jack or can't be bothered to draw it... but what would that hold even do? You need to put your arms up higher and behind the neck.

That's the kind of hold you would do on your friend when you are trying to hold him back... not restrain him completely.

He could use the back of his head to bust her face, or just reach back around with his arms.

She sent a photo of him to someone else, and he's right fucking there. It shouldn't be a big stumbling block that he deleted the photo, get the old one or take another one. God, she's so bad at this.

If there's another fucking car chase scene, I don't think my heart could handle it.

Well it can't be immediate, or else you'd constantly be fighting it every time you paused for a second. Maybe 3 seconds is a good time limit, but also enough that he could get to it.

I'm impressed Ryan was able to delete the picture and then call for help while sprinting for his life. He's probably safe as long as no one took his picture at the rally or recorded the fight and none of his fellow volunteers is willing to identify him.

>She didn't use a built in phone finder, but one she wrote herself
Cool, what a genius. Now if only she wasn't enough of a fuck up to: play keep away until her upload finished, lock her phone when putting it away to fight goons, keep track of her phone in general, stay on topic long enough to figure out Ryan's name or anything about him.

Is Pokemon Go out in this universe?

Because that's a reason for some people to max out their screen lock timer.

shes not upset that he deleted the photo, shes probably worried he found out her identity

You know what... this is an alternate universe right?

I think that not only is the plot different... but women are the stronger gender in this world. Mike can punch Joe in the face multiple times and it leaves small marks.

Joyce can knock out a full grown man with a single punch. Amber regularly takes out multiple male opponents.

Protect the men Cred Forums

You realize what this means, right?

Ryan's about to escape in his friend's car, no doubt having gained knowledge about Amber's secret identity. This means he's going to become a recurring villain.

We're going to be stuck with this shithole subplot for ages

The DoA-verse exists in a quantum paradox where it's still 2010, but stuff that happened after 2012 can still be referenced at will

Lots of men don't. How is one supposed to be sure you aren't one of them?

I know. Like for example

Since nobody else has said it, thanks new Patreanon. U a bro.

The issue with this phone situation is not that "oh that's possible, but it's obtuse", it's only obtuse because this focal plot device vanishes between panels and poses, making such a fervor over it harder to track since it teleports around with the other characters. Amber's got it, then she DOESN'T, but if she put it away in front of the guys, how did they not notice where, then when they're jumped, somehow Ryan sees she dropped it and gets away, and apparently all of that happened fast enough that he bypassed the lock screen (which, if she put it away you'd think she'd turn off the screen and reset the lock, but actually, that would be smart). Then apparently despite leaving from the same exit, Ryan is headed south(towards the fourth wall) and Amber ended up coming from the east. Willis does not into many things well, or any things good.

Why the fuck assume that someone you're clearly trusting enough to have sex with is also the type to explode? If you think they'll explode if you don't want to do sexthing why are you having sex with a grenade? Why is a man's base state value explosive by default in their eyes?

>He's probably safe as long as no one took his picture at the rally or recorded the fight and none of his fellow volunteers is willing to identify him.

Even if someone did the only thing they'd get is a picture of him getting attacked by a loon in a mask.

Until Joyce reports him they can't do shit

She should have had him on the ground in a more policeman's hold situation. Sal can't weight that much he could just lean forward and start running

>Until Joyce reports him they can't do shit
Unless the plan is to just lynch him on social media. Maybe Amazi-Girl is hoping that other victims will step forward if they get Ryan's pic out there with an accusation next to it?

maybe for all her genius all she had was a swipe lock.

Roofiemobile AWAY.

>For all her genius of bringing her actual fucking phone around in vigilante mode
Thanks Amazing Spider-Man.

Anytime she can stroke her own ego she'll take it. That's how utterly insecure she is and one of the reasons she does this Vigilante bullshit. Its not about helping people.

>You may not realize this, but humans have these great things called non-verbal cues. There is also more than one way of asking a question

You're still getting consent that way, so I'm not seeing what the problem is here. That may be why people called you a virgin loser.

>comic in question literally depicts two people asking each other for permission to do any little thing in the most boring way possible
>point out that this makes sex look like a boring chore
>lel what a virgin

I feel like I remember a specific OJST comic where they're like "you can ask for consent in a flirty/non-moodbreaking way, such as these examples!". Maybe it came after the "may I initiate P-in-V intercourse?" one.

a lot of text in this thread

I don't even read this comic that much, just what's posted on Cred Forums. But god damn, literally NOTHING ever happens. It's like I'm reading constant setup after setup with no plans on what to do with it or to ever acknowledge it.

Daily reminder that if you hate thedewd but don't filter his tripcode, you are a pussy.

I just insert them anally.

As long as they get inside me somehow.

Giggity

Okay, let's break this down.

First of all, Amber didn't need a "friend" to write a phone-location app. Apple and Google already have that tech integrated into their phones. The problem is that nobody remembers it exists.
Secondly, as and say, Sal should be holding Ryan in a more tight position. Otherwise, one elbow to the gut or one kidney shot and he gets away.

Next, it's interesting how Amber doesn't even know Ryan's name, when she could have easily asked Joyce a long-ass time ago. Even a first name could have worked. I haven't a clue why she's so obsessed with learning his name directly from him when she could easily just ask either Joyce or the internship supervisor.
As for deleting the photo and getting into the phone before the screen locked, that's a technical impossibility. Most if not all phones nowadays lock immediately after the Power button is tapped, and given the amount of time of the fight scene between Amber and Ryan/The Intern Bros, the phone should have definitely auto-locked itself. Plus, Amber acts as if the picture was deleted from her phone permanently, when Dorothy should have a copy. If Amber is this concerned about picture deletion, she should consider looking into cloud services for backups.
Also, Sal and Ryan are copy-pasted.

Finally, the car. How the fuck did this car roll onto the scene without Amber or Sal noticing? Why are Sal and Ryan being pushed back, as if they were hit by the car?

Of course.

>We're going to be stuck with this shithole subplot for ages
Probably. It took, like, three to four years for Ryan to resurface, so it's only a matter of time before he comes back again.

That's probably the plan. It would be nice if Amber told us this.

I can't get over her bringing her personal phone during hero-ing. Either get a burner phone or don't bring one at all.

Welcome to "Dumbing of Age".

She sent it through snapchat, so the photo is gone forever.

WHOOPS! LOOKS LIKE AMAZI-GIRL FUCKED EVERYTHING UP AGAIN!

Well actually, as I was reading through the strip, I noticed Ryan actually never tells Joyce his name, only we the fans can see his name in the tags.

>Finally, the car. How the fuck did this car roll onto the scene without Amber or Sal noticing?
More importantly, why is the car speeding through what appears to be, at least from the previous update, one of those little road inlets you see on campus streets where buses pull in?

Is the implication that one of Ryan's buddies just tried to outright murder some people? Because even for a group of people being portrayed as the 'village rapists' that's a pretty big leap.

>Congresswoman doing sound test on stage before an event
>masked person and black person charge the stage
>they aren't immediately shot or tackled by security
Does Willis live in real life?

Actually he didn't masturbate until he was 19, not 21.

>legally unjustified assault and battery
Good message for your readers!

>Amber, now convinced that Ryan knows her identity, panics and threatens to kill him or throw him into traffic or some stupid shit
>Sal stops her crazy ass
>While they go all Batman vs Superman on each other, Ryan gets away
>Amber continues her slow descent into madness

It's immeasurably worse when something does happen, somehow

Vigilantes are already illegal. Batman punches people he doesn't have legal evidence against all the time.

And, consequently a lot of people Batman punches and takes to the cops either get cut loose or sent to Arkham instead of fucking jail.

Even the worst public defender would have no trouble making a case for violation of civil liberties and get the case thrown out.

In all her incarnations, Sal is strong as fuck.

Batman also goes after supervillains and others who cause death and despair on a massive scale that are also above the law for one reason or another.

Batman doesn't chase down petty criminals that attempted to commit a crime once a month or so ago so he can beat them

>Batman doesn't chase down petty criminals that attempted to commit a crime once a month or so ago so he can beat them
Batman beats up muggers and gangs all the time. Also, Ryan is tried to rape someone and has probably been successful before or since, which is a very serious crime.

>batman beats up muggers all the time
Yes, while they are committing their crimes, or in order to actively prevent them.

Batman has never heard about a failed mugging that happened a month ago and gone on a feverish manhunt.

Ryan can't be prosecuted or punished in any way unless Joyce comes forward.

I'm afraid Amazi-girl doesn't claim to be the world's greatest detective, this is all she can do.

>I'm afraid Amazi-girl doesn't claim to be the world's greatest detective, this is all she can do.
You should probably kill yourself. That's all you can do.

Law Enforcement of any stripe is absent pretty much everywhere in his world.

Nah, they're there, they're just off murdering innocent black people who dindu nuffin.

>If you think they'll explode if you don't want to do sexthing why are you having sex with a grenade?

Well what else would they do, user? Have sex with someone they trust is responsible and won't rape them instead of a complete wildcard who could by a rapist or infected with some STD or something? Don't be ridiculous. It's 2016.

>trust that women are responsible and smart enough to indicate displeasure or unwillingness to do something
>"You don't think women have their own agency"

Joyce knows he's the son of a pastor but she doesn't know what his name is after spending hours with him at a party.

Willis is a good writer.

I'm actually in awe of how stupid this is.

Let me guess
>Ryan is going to get away
>In a fit of rage, Amber blames Sal, restarting their feud.
>Both plotlines continue into the end of time.

But Sal is an innocent black person who dindu nuffin.

Willis could have her go after Dorothy, since if he was able to delete the photo he could also see who received the message, which in turn will lead to a confrontation with Joyce.

is he even the son of a pastor? For all we know he could be lying about that just like everything else.

I mean, I assume he is the son of a pastor only so Willis can wank some more about how he hates Midwest Protestantism but nothing in the story leads me to believe he actually is what he claims he is

> Ryan doesn't actually care who or what she is
> He just deleted the photo and was planning to throw the phone in a trash can
> Amazi-girl will fret and worry and stalk Ryan some more
> She'll get busted because Ryan's fairly well-connected and an anti-DeSanto PAC is very willing to set up a string to catch a "fucking dangerous vigilante"

Ryan's Bro Patrol to the rescue! Because every super-villain needs an army of Putties to beat up.

People keep saying "Wait did Ryan's friend try to murder someone?"

No, dude, he was trying to startle the MASKED VIGILANTE and BLACK BIKER CHICK WHO IS BLACK who are currently holding their friend in a hold. You know, sizing up his friend and picking which kidney to cut out first, as far as he knows.

Your friend is being held hostage by two muscled up goons, yeah, you floor the fucking gas and aim for the holder's knees.

Ethan's new boyfriend is a total non-entity, too. When Ethan is asked if his sperm can be used as a carrier for Leslie's DNA so she and Robin can have a biological child together, Ethan turns around to ask if it's okay.

On one hand, it's his sperm and won't even carry his DNA. You could choose any given person's sperm to use instead. There is no reason to ask Ethan for this at all. Choosing yes or no is entirely moot.

ON THE OTHER HAND, Ethan's boyfriend must know Robin as the total dipshit asshole who brokered a WORLD PEACE LAW on the stipulation her girlfriend would be obligated to do ultra-widely-released pornography without her prior consent. What's to say they're actually changing the DNA? What's to say they aren't going to come up with some WaaAAAAcky hijinks and slap Ethan with a paternity suit in ten years? You really think that's beyond Mrs. "I'll half-rape my girlfriend on a Cadbury Egg bender!"?

Ryan's behavior in his first story doesn't make a lot of sense if he wasn't already very familiar with Joyce's personality and background. If it were anyone else in the plot he'd come off as a sperging weirdo.

It'd be the opposite. DeSanto would be very anti-Amazi-Girl while her opponent would support her heavily.

A story about a group of frat bros who drive around and rescue other frats when they're in trouble could make for some excellent black humor.

>DeSanto would be very anti-Amazi-Girl while her opponent would support her heavily.
I'm not certain of that. Republicans and Democrats can be equally authoritarian, but more importantly, there may be ZERO evidence of DeSanto even asking about this vigilante smack dab in the middle of her district. Your campus town is becoming a national punchline and you haven't even called the D.A. to ask what the fuck is going on? Really? That's a political attack ad waiting to happen.

What I'm saying is, if DeSanto is that embattled, they're going to use Amazi-Girl as leverage. Not the least because now DeSanto's on footage as seeing vigilantism and again DOING NOTHING, just complaining she isn't wearing a cape.

"kraboof"

The "At least I don't have That Guy's Problems!" was also a bit of a way to throw Jacob under a bus because Willis got tired of writing him and didn't want to write him as Ethan's nerd rival anymore.

Her opponent would be pro-Amazi-Girl by virtue of being able to use allegations of a DeSanto intern being a rapist as campaign fodder.

Unless suddenly she's NOT running unopposed, and the other Republican front-runner can stab at her complete inability to handle a crisis.

Ryan was apparently an ass in he Roomies incarnation, in which he does basically the same thing to Ruth. Basically, he's another one of those deep inside "jokes" where a reader knows where his plot's going if you've been following Willis' shtick.

Her rival, who is apparently attacking her pretty hard, has already been mentioned.

I haven't read Roomies, but from what I gleaned from these threads is that Ryan hit it and quit it while Ruth got attached.

>has already been mentioned.
What, two years and three in-world days ago?

Willis is going to ride the DeSanto train as far as he possibly can, because that way he doesn't have to memorize drawing yet another face. That's the real reason the same characters keep appearing in 'alternate timelines.' He can barely distinguish Sal and Walky, and they're completely different builds and genders.

Couple days ago, last time Frieda showed up.

I'm pretty sure that was added into the roomies after he appeared in dumbing of age.

>when she could have easily asked Joyce a long-ass time ago
She specifically says "If he told me his name, I don't remember it."

All things considered it's kinda hard to believe that Amber actually cares about Joyce nearly getting raped. It's like Willis is unintentionally supporting the notion that Amazi-Girl only exists as a pleasure outlet for Amber.

BROOOOOOOOOH

"It's the bro alarm, to the contrivance car."

That's pretty much it. She does this for her own ego. She could give a shit about anyone having any kind of closure.

>Brocommand to Brosquad, we've got 10-998 in progress at Shane's Sports Bar. Repeat a 10-998, baby crazy townie trying to get her MRS degree, prep for immediate target extraction.

Be wary of their dreaded attack: The Bro Kick.

Much like Batman and Joker, Amazi-Girl will find ways to let Ryan 'accidentally' escape or get leverage so she has someone to constantly chase and fight.

Batman regularly captures the Joker, the contrivance is in that he keep escaping from custody.

Prepare for immediate Brostraction

Get Hyped, Bro!

The perspective on this page is ass. It looks like the car slammed right into the guy but his bodyy got pulled up because fuck physics

Also what does it matter that he deleted a photo of his face? Does this idiot think that random photographs of faces are evidence of rape?

God damn this comic never ceases to amaze me with how bad it is. Here's hoping this keeps escalating and gets as bad as toe dad adventures

The problem is that's not how its portrayed in terms of tone. A reasonable person looks at all the circumstances objectively and sees Amber as a psycho obsessed with her own anger that doesn't really give a flying fuck about the "injustice" she fights, but the comic puts her forward as a genuine hero who is in the right and should be rooted for.

>Brocommand to Brosquad, priority alert! Bro went whaling at last call and is now trapped under a passed out fattie, location unknown. Full mobilization of all Brosquads for a complete grid search. Clock's ticking, Bros, we can't let our Bro down!

>Get those Brojacks in place we're running against the clock with this Moped.

>B.. Bros

>Hang in there bro, we'll get you a beer bong and some twin sets of double DDs soon.

>Drat he's escaped again.

Looks at a cup sitting on the desk.

*snif*

>Roofies

But is he like Dr. LIGHT and makes rape his gimmick

i filter him
i cant filter all the idiots encouraging him

This can't possibly just end on a cliffhanger can it? There's no fucking way he's going to drag this out longer.

So she carries around her normal phone when she's Amazi Girl? She doesn't use a backup? Christ, she really is the worst superheroine ever.

>God damn it, bro, what's taking so long? We're losing him!
>Bro...I'm not gonna make it...
>Don't say that, bro, we'll get you outta here and hit up the lake this weekend. Drink some beer, go jet ski'ing.
>It...it's okay, bro. We all gotta go sometime. When they ask...when they ask why I did it tell 'em, more cushion for the pushin'.
>I will, bro, I will.

*suddenly Becky*

So Willis gave the character a name when, in canon, he never actually gave out his name.

That seems counter-productive to the narrative of events. It would be like explicitly showing the name of Charles Foster Kane's sled as being Rosebud early in the movie, but then you keep going with the film and the question of what Rosebud is.

That's entirely possible. He didn't even honk.
Better yet, the car appears to be stopping on a dime. That takes skill if you plan to hit the brakes hard on a car that is (presumably) speeding, and you aim to stop at a specific point between two groups of people.

in b4 some kind of Reverse Cerberus and the comic becomes Willis' Batman fanfiction.

You'd be surprised what Willis can do.
I bet this ends with Amber ready to chase after the car, but Sal pulls her back to stop her, resulting in Amber sperging out against Sal. Ryan Roofies (Himself) and The Driver (Ryan Reynolds) get away, and Amber ditches Sal.

See, that's actually more happening between characters in five lines than in most DoA stories.

Well, it HAS been a few weeks since we last saw her. I wonder how Willis will handwave the notion that she's essentially squatting in a dorm and attending school at no cost.

Drew was pretty reasonable throughout his entire storyline so it surprised me when he was treated as the bad guy by Willis.

Same thing happened with Walky not understanding why Sal called him "white" because he got good grades.

Yeah, Drew got pretty villain-ized as soon as possible. You can see how defensive Willis is about his hobby by that character arc alone.

Also, unrelated, but I kind of hope that his children end up hating him as much as he hates his own family.

>Why are Sal and Ryan being pushed back, as if they were hit by the car?

I can only guess they either jumped back out of the way or somehow an opening between them and Ryan big enough for the car to fit in happened/

Maybe the driver's intent was to pick up Ryan and drive off and WIllis just hamhanded the logic behind it as usual

>Does Willis live in real life?

Do you REALLY need to ask this? It's pretty obvious he doesn't.

>Batman doesn't chase down petty criminals that attempted to commit a crime once a month or so ago so he can beat them

He has plenty of subordinates to handle the lower level criminals. Batgirl etc

Amber is more like the World's Greatest Defective

Yeah, but even Batgirl or one of the Robin's isn't going to be bothered with tracking someone like this down.

He tried, unsucccessfully, to roofie a girl. That's the rapist equivalent of a purse-snatcher trying to steal an old lady's purse and realizing a block or two after he's run off that he grabbed the menu for a chinese takeout place she was holding in her hand instead of the purse.

... and then two months later, Barbara spots him at a dinner party and proceeds to chase him down into the street to do a flying kick into his spine.

He successfully roofied her, he just failed to follow it up. It's more like if you tried to rob someone at gunpoint but got punched in the mouth before you could take the valuables.

...

Why do we keep making euphemisms for roofying that involve a far lesser crime? He tried to rape a girl with a drug instead of putting a knife to her throat.

If an assassin fired a gun at someone, but misses and escapes, Batman would make a point of beating that guy's ass the next time he saw him.

Well I was trying to make a point that an illegal action was made by Ryan. I was assuming threat/coercion with a deadly weapon is a bit higher than drugging, but I wasn't trying to downplay what he did. To me, "tr[ying] unsuccessfully, to roofie a girl" makes it sound like the drug was failed to be administered, when Joyce was drugged and even experienced the memory loss associated with it.

One of the things about the roofie-ing is that it didn't actually kick in until after Joyce had cut his face and Sarah had smashed his head in with a baseball bat.

So it's more like if a robber had tried to steal a woman's purse, but managed to fight back against the robber with a friend before dropping the purse by accident, after which Batman came up and surveyed the situation and let the robber get away, then coming around a month later and delivering a flying kick to the robber's spine after repeatedly asking his name and uploading his picture to the Internet.

Which reminds me: Amber uploaded his image to the Internet, but apparently Ryan managed to delete it? Was it only gone from her phone, or was it uploaded to a website? One is easier to delete in a limited amount of time than the other. Fucking hell, this plot.

>Fucking hell, this plot.
She wrote an app that allows you to track down a cell phone by GPS and yet she doesn't have a secure one-way filedrop, nor carry a burner phone. This plot is more holes than it is plot.

I'm sure Willis fans are eating it up.

> Beating up someone for a crime that was never reported and that no one else knows about
Sorry but that's just assault and battery. Joyce needs to come clean my dick or it's simple violence.

even IF Joyce presses charges Amber would still be guilty of assault. Someone being convicted of a crime isn't open season for them. It's the cops job to handle this shit.

Plus it would be impossible to prove. First off Joyce has to admit to going to an underage drinking party, so her testimony is already faulty because there's drinking. Ill admit I don't know how long shit stays in your system but all Ryan has to do is deny it and say Joyce is a lightweight who didn't remember things in all the excitement of a fight breaking out

No one said she could ever prove anything, but it's a real mess to beat up a guy for reasons no one even knows about.

This strip would be a million times better with eurobeat

youtube.com/watch?v=dv13gl0a-FA

>Was it only gone from her phone, or was it uploaded to a website?
I'm assuming he only deleted it from her phone. He may have even sent a text to Dorothy to throw her off the trail.

*Twice.
And not we have vehicular assault depending on who's in the car (money on Becky)

>First off Joyce has to admit to going to an underage drinking party,

Why do people bring logic into Willy's shit?

''Hey, she did this, so I guess that cops should be throwing her in jail!!''

Like Willy's is going to make a character having a sad ending after that ''baby kitty that will never die'' strip

>''Hey, she did this, so I guess that cops should be throwing her in jail!!'
Completely not what he said. She wouldn't get arrested, she would be discredited as a witness.
>so her testimony is already faulty because there's drinking.
Oh wait, he said that, you just can't read.

No, you are the one that can't read, my point is that Willy's doesn't give a shit about logic and is a proven fact

so why keep bringing logic as if that's going to matter ?

>so why keep bringing logic as if that's going to matter ?

I thought that was the whole point of these threads. they're certainly not up because of actual investment in the characters and story

Will Patreanon abandon us when the clock strikes 12 again?

Sorry for abandoning you all this weekend- I was in New York for work. But it's not like you really missed anything.

Anyways, Amber has go-go gadget skates now.

CALLED IT

Fuck off.

Not you patreanon, you're cool.

This comic should fuck off.

I'm just gonna fucking leave this here and go jack off.

Fuck off, David Willis.

This is getting ridiculous.

Oh great ANOTHER high speed chase.

I'm sure it will be as amazing and realistic as the last one.

Is Willis really going to expect us to believe that the incredible fat can catch up to a speeding car on rollerblades?

And thanks patreanon.

Yes. She'll use her grappling hook again. She'll skid straight into a light pole.

It's only cool when Marty McFly does it.
youtube.com/watch?v=0yGZ2fQfM-A

Marty actually grabs onto the fucking vehicle before it speeds off. He doesn't try to catch up to it on fucking skates.

Once again I am totally at a loss for words.

Just.... what the fuck?

alright. I won't draw anymore of them, user.
Wow, Amber sure is horrible and I wish all the bad things happen to her and nobody else. thank, new patreanon

youtu.be/dW8kKTvS53w?t=1m18s
Just leavin' this here.

It's like poetry.

Pokemon Go disables the screenlock

I say keep drawing them.
But balance it out with Mary and her user Husbando.

Because how else will it drain your battery?

I forgot she had one of those.

> "Yes, Hello, Officer, a masked vigilante is tailing our car intent on beating up and kidnapping a friend of ours."
> "She's throwing around an accusation he's raped someone, but she's also careening back and forth on the street using a grappling hook as a pull line. Yes, just like she was water-skiing."
> "Uh ... 4th and Maine? We're driving a good 10 miles over the speed limit to avoid her. Yes, I understand, but we can't just slam it at 60. It's dangerous enough already."
> "... Sure, we'll take a right up ahead. Just be careful; I think she broke a few of his ribs already."

Why not stop him from getting in the car to begin with? He was right there.

Ugh, Cred Forums ate this post, but seriously, by this point the guys in the "getaway" car should be calling the police. They're being pursued by someone without license and without cause, and VERY likely someone using a drag line to secure themselves at high speed on a busy street.

Frankly if she doesn't wound up shot by someone with concealed carry I'll be surprised.

So does that mean she never got her Amazi-Bike?

They could also just drive away really fast and then hit the brakes. I don't give a fuck what Willis is doing, he can't have her survive momentum.

What the fuck is this?

Did those wheels just pop out by pure willpower? I don't see her pressing a button, or flipping a switch, or whatever.

Guys, I know it's weird but... I find what is currently occuring in this comic to be highly implausible.

I don;t care what anyone says, I like Tom Arnold

>I don't give a fuck what Willis is doing, he can't have her survive momentum.

Maybe all that body fat will cushion it.

Since she's phat.

No you see, Amber is able to keep her current pudgy body weight and do amazing jumps and flips and fight off people twice her size AND build her own pair of retractable skate boots AND still not get caught by security cameras.

He's had her do the Batman-lunge-from-the-parapet thing from a flat surface, because SHE BIG SHE FAST SHE SO SUPAH.

He doesn't care about reality or physics. All he wants is some vigilante to STRIKE DOWN SICK FILTH like a TRUE BUCKAROO.

Seriously, though, all they need to do is gun it around ... oh, 20 miles an hour, run a few red lights, she'd never catch up to them. The most they'd have to explain is "Yeah we were chased by Amazi-girl." You know, the girl who left a few graffiti taggers bleeding with skulls cracked from that cement cinder block she was throwing around.

I'm PRETTY sure the Police Department wants some words with her.

...

This would be about half as stupid if she weren't making a face like she's trying to squeeze out a shit in the last panel.

Who doesn't?

...

If they stopped suddenly Willis would just have her flip onto the roof of the car.

So Amber is going to blow out her ankle in the next panel, right? Because there is no way she can support her weight with her leg at that angle.

That's from GTA Online.

Mo-Men-Tum.

She's biting her lip again in the last panel. She really IS turned on by thoughts of violence. I'm surprised Danny doesn't come out of their sex sessions with bruises.

Also, since when were Mat and Pat from Two Best Friends Play friends with Ryan?

Roseann Barr?

holy shit Willis has literally stolen my OC's idea so now if I write a comic people will say I got the idea from amazi-girl and DOA despite the fact that my inspiration was actually VOTOMs so I'm actually mad

(also the art in that last panel is garbage)

The thing I hate...one of the things I hate about DoA is that Willis never surprises you in a good way.

You either have conflicts that have endings you can predict from literal months in the future, like the whole Carla/Mary thing, or you have shit that comes right out of left field and makes no goddamn sense, like the Toedad chase or Amazi-Girl somehow procuring custom-made boots with retractable skates in the 14 or less days since the Toedad chase.

It's like he'll turn the ship out of the path of an iceberg, only to slam into an even bigger iceberg.

>(also the art in that last panel is garbage)

Just "the art is garbage" will do.

Nah, the violence has to come before the sex. Dina should count herself lucky that she didn't get Ryan'd by Amber after a night of petty vigilantism.

>Frankly if she doesn't wound up shot by someone with concealed carry I'll be surprised.

If they drive south a bit and get a little further from campus, it won't even be concealed carry. Everybody and their mother has a rifle and/or a shotgun in Indiana. Hell, my high school always scheduled a teacher in-service day during the opening of deer season because half the school wouldn't show up.

It's not even fourteen days. I don't even know if it's been a full seven days.

Good point. Does that mean that her sex with Danny was more or less out of pity?

There is NOTHING heroic about heelies

DO they even make them in adult size?

god i love that movie so fuckin much

Yes.
I own a pair

....Unironically.....

I wish Willis had the balls to have Amber continue to descend into insanity and shoot someone over a petty crime.

It's been six days.

And I think Danny and Amber managed to be so pathetic they had mutual pity sex.

It sure would have been nice if we had a scene of Amber tinkering with her boots instead of writing fanfiction.

Turns out Dina builds all of Amber's gear and sends her out with only a vague explanation of how it works in the hope that Amber will get herself killed so Dina will get the room to herself.

that would be interesting so we can't have the character actually work to improve

The aren't even heelies
These skates are some how able to deploy on their own and lock, supporting the weight of an adult woman that is putting them under a lot of stress to catch up to a car.
This is insanity.

Na, I bet Carla builds all of Amber's Gear. Being the brilliant engineering student that she is.

You have no idea how happy this makes me.

I mean it, it's so unbelievably retarded that I love it. I'd rather have an aneurysm and the complete bullshit pulled than meander through dull comics about Becky or whatever.

It'd actually be easier to build the reverse, a pair of roller skates with a retractable sole.

It'd be easier for her to have a little gas powered scooter she just carried on her back if she wanted to always be ready to catch speeding cars.

Electric would be more compact.

There is one thing I like about this strip.

Sal giving up. It's pretty funny. But only in the context of this comic where everyone is insane and does insane things and she's just being realistic.

So what, she's Iron Man now?

I left this comic for 3 days, just to see shit is still dumb as hell. Why is no one smart in this comic?

More like Inspector Gadget.

Wow we hit the bump limit again.

>Not sure if that's badass or ridiculous
A little bit of both.
Which is exactly the level you wanna be at in comic books.
Al Ewing would agree.

nobody cares whether your oc wears heelys

How do we make Willis to commit an hero?

Getting?

Oh for fuck's sake.

Not that user, but the preceding stuff could have been a lot more ridiculous. That's a terrifying thought.

>we're suppose to take these characters seriously

God, this edit is the greatest.