Heroes For Hire v2 Storytime (Part 2)

As someone mentioned in Daughters of the Dragon, Conner's art helps. Here, it seems they're trying to be subtle, so we just get random ass shots, which, my snark aside, haven't been anything worth mentioning since the 90's.

Remember Anons, if you're going to pick where to bury your family members, go somewhere where there aren't many trees or bushes, to avoid ninja attacks.

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yeah it's gotta be Conner. Harley has the same problem of her not on art.

>this damn fool with a mace on his head

They must've tried REALLY had to make this guy threatening. Seriously, go for the legs, and his weapons are useless. It doesn't exactly look like he can take them off, after all.

At least he DOES punch, so he's not completely stupid.

>and then his stupid weapon gets stuck to a random pillar

On the other hand...

I could've sworn Conner was on at least one of the various Harley books Gray and Palmiotti were on. Maybe they just got a convincing copycat?

I think she has to draw X issues a year for DC so she might have done some. I think mostly it's similar artists though

>"You walk out that door, then you're off the team."
>there is just a random doorway in the middle of the rubble, with no actual door in between

Black Cat!
Black Cat!

>"Yeah, but he's got deadly hands."

I can only imagine how random that line must seem to those of you who weren't here when we read Deadly Hands of Kung Fu.

... What the fuck?!

No, seriously. What the fuck am I reading?

Sadly we aren't getting much Felicia in this issue, unfortunately.

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Almost at the end, and the Black Cat fan FINALLY gets his black cat.

>has two ball and chain morning stars on his head, a weapon so stupid there's no historical record of anyone ever using the handheld version
>Chain is long enough that the balls should hit him in the face every time he turns his head
>It's not possible to turn your head fast enough without breaking your neck to do any real damage with those things anyway

Good lord, who actually thought this was a good idea?

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>"Ricadonna's gone from Glam Mafia Queen to super-powered freak."

>"Okay, nunchucks are cool, right? And maces are neat? What if we COMBINE the two?"

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>That smile when he gets to fight people

diaper fetish TRASH
Reused shots FUCKING TRASH

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>Colleen taking the time to bug Shang-Chi about wanting to bang Tarantula

By the way, I forgot to mention it last time. Flame here ISN'T the same guy from Luke's "Power Man" series. I can't remember WHAT his name is sadly, but this guy was created for this series.

I love how nobody ever comments on Fera being one of the wolves that killed Danny's mom, even though it's literally the most interesting thing about her.

>"Don't take it personally, I don't like bugs."
>"I heard you dated Spider-Man. Was he no good at-"

Yeah, she took that line as well as you'd expect she did.

>Reused shots FUCKING TRASH
Honestly, I'm so used to Bendis doing it multiple times a page, just two reused shots doesn't even register to me anymore.

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When fucking ORKA is saying you're a bit nutty, you know you've got problems.

>"Well, Heroes For Hire has a no-kill policy, but technically, Misty fired her, so..."
>Colleen is genuinely considering letting Tarantula kill her

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>"Hey, WE were supposed to blow up the organ generator!"
>Eh, we still get paid."
>"Yeah, I don't even know how to use these."

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>"How about a drink then?"
>"I don't drink."
>"Me neither, I just thought it was customary for land-dwellers to imbibe during periods of grief."

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>"I'd like to hire a hero, please."
>carries a big ole' jar of coins

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>ywn kiss Colleen
>suicidalfrog.jpg

Why even live?

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>"A robot named 'Vic'."

And now it's Humbug's time to be the asshole.

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Oh jeez, this is going to last a while, isn't it?

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>And suddenly, Doctor Doom."

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>gas grenades in the pizza

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Oh good, we're dealing with Gerber's Defender's villains, AND a malfunctioning Doombot.

So yeah, this random kid managed to reprogram a Doombot somehow.

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So Grim Reaper, Man-Ape... and I have no idea if this third woman has appeared anywhere else.

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Huh, I guess Black Cat also knows about bombs, in addition to locks?

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>"YOU'RE the best we can do in terms of backup?"
>"You hired me."

>"Do not use that bomb to blow up Atlantis."
>"Would I do something like that?"
>literally everyone says Yes

That second panel back-and-forth just makes me chuckle.

>"Huh, villains escaping prison. Terribly rare."

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>"I'll enjoy using in a spectacularly carnal manner."

So if someone steals your body, fucks someone, and you get it back, are you still a virgin? I get the feeling Humbug is wondering that.

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>Man-Ape in a bathrobe, cooking eggs

>"Will you relax? We're villains, we don't roll over on each other like Captain America and Iron Man."

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>Misty's arm has energy blasts now

Notice they never commented on that up until now.

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This kid is going to be telling stories about this day for the REST of his life.

Wow, that's a LOT of powers for a D-List Avengers villain.

>Humbug taking the time to perv on Ruby Thursday

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And as much as I try not to end on Cliffhangers, Anons, I'm afraid I have to leave it at that for today. See you tomorrow for more Heroes For Hire!

Remember that one episode of It's Always Sunny?

What's an egg hat?

I think Palmiotti and Grey told Tucci to always make sure the women in this series were in model poses.

Nice to see Misty has fully embraced nipple indicators.

>Tarantula
>Government Powers

>But not a shady South American fascist government, the US Government, because she was a sibling to one of the Stamford kids.

Booo.

Well, that place could certainly use a case of arson.

Well, his boss is apparently Fu Manchu, so it might have been a deliberate punishment.

This looks more like the cover to a Chaos comic from the 90s, frankly.

Well, it IS Colleen. "Once unsheathed it must taste blood" etc.

How H4H got the no kill rule in the first place seems to be an act of extreme compromise by her.

>I have no idea if this third woman has appeared anywhere else.

Look at her, man. She's clearly a minor villain from the 90s.

That's a potentially useful panel.

>Jim Reaper.

Someone loaded the Evil Overlord list into a Doombot.

How did he not become the next multi-series event villain?

A lot of them come from the fact that he died and came back as part of the Lethal Legion.
More than once.

Because he's Wonder Man's brother, and Wonder Man used to be one of the Avenger's main flying bricks.

Is Tarantula related to the South American super-villain with spiky venom shoes?

She doesn't seem to be.

bump

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I can't even find this on Google.

Okay Anons, bad news. I'm not going to be able to storytime on Sunday. To make up for it, we'll do a bigger storytime on Monday.

S'okay. That works. JSA user's off monday.

No problem, mate.