Redpill me on the vikings Cred Forums

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They were niggers

We waz leaf Erickson n shit

i want mads to be my dads

god damn that fucking shit put me to sleep 3 times on netflix

i gave up on the fourth night

Our Pagan forefathers who worshiped the ancient cult of babylon after their migrations.

Did they bring this Babylonian cult back home to Scandinavia?

>They weren't a people.
>They got to the Americas by accident.
>They more or less got their asses kicked in open combat.
>Castles are a byproduct of their invasions.
>The TV show is made up garbage.
>Shieldmaidens are 100% allegory.
>Berserkers were more like hired goons for land quarrels.
>They didn't have horned helmets.

"... or as they were known in ancient times "Kikeings" - A History of the Nordic Peoples, pp. 237

Dumb cuckolded faggots that got their asses kicked by everyone they tried to invade until the roman army stepped in much like the taliban.


Yes. Nimrod is Adon is Odin.


>The English advance was then delayed by the need to pass through the choke-point presented by the bridge itself. The Anglo-Saxon Chronicle has it that a giant Norse axeman (possibly armed with a Dane Axe) blocked the narrow crossing, and single-handedly held up the entire English army. The story is that this axeman cut down up to 40 Englishmen and was only defeated when an English soldier floated under the bridge in a half-barrel and thrust his spear through the laths in the bridge, mortally wounding the axeman.

Just listen to viking metal


Inept, barbaric pieces of shit. I wish people would stop glorifying them.

any of you guys know any good recent medieval movies with sword fighting and shit? i think i've seen just about every one ever made

old and retarded. it's like seriously, how do you not have cell phones?

Useless cunts. Like playing them in CK2 for 30mins-1hr until first gavelkind fuckery.

skyrim for the nords desu

Almost all of the recent ones aren't good, and just about none of them compare to Excalibur.

I'm more or less convinced that it really can't be done. So I just play Mount & Blade.

Invaded native americans.
Explored every corner of the globe.
Were ran out of atlantis when it sank.
Catch little cute birds in nets and eat them.

What else do you want to know?

>What else do you want to know?

More about Atlantis

i just like to watch brainless high production value medieval battles even if it isn't accurate. i'm running out of shit to watch though

Best to go with Japanese or Chinese. They don't degrade their medieval heritage like (((we))) do.

>projectile vomit birds

we wuz time travelers n sheit

13th warrior

I loved that movie when I was younger. I was annoyed that they showed the other tribe as humans though. More fun when they were fighting monsters.

>basically funded by jews to raid catholic churches

enough said

Actually they're supposed to be relict Neanderthals

Niggers o' the Sea

The TV show is god tier faggot neck yourself and Shieldmaidens were real.

okay since no one fucking bothered to reply with anything at all i guess it falls on me since i'm norwegian

vikings never had art. they never had paintings or any shit like that. they never wrote shit down and even if they did the village next to them would burn them down, burn their books and call them faggots

the saga of ragnar lothbrok, the main character in vikings, was written hundreds of years after he was dead, by some dude in iceland. and this story includes ragnar killing a fucking dragon, which makes these stories unreliable at best. the people they raided and invaded did write things down, but they obviously didn't write very favorable things about them

in most of their conquests, they were outnumbered, and relied on maneuver warfare. they started by raiding churches and killing defenseless priests. then as their power and wealth grew they eventually invaded mainland england, told beautifully by The Last Kingdom, which is a lot better than Vikings

at the time they were the only military power in europe that had ships that were big enough to cross the ocean AND small enough to go up rivers at the same time, giving them a unique advantage that they used to dodge large cavalry armies which would have fucking destroyed them if they tried to fight them head on

we were also one of the last places in europe to get cucked by the holy roman church, and really the only place religion ever stuck was in Kristiansand, the city furthest south. in all other parts of norway we fucking burned churches down in the 90s because fuck christianity


We wuz vikangz n sheit

it's a poor man's Game of Thrones

There have been accounts since recorded germanic history of their women coming to battles to watch their men fight, if their men ran the women would cut them down "Order 227 style".



GoT, vikings... what else is there in this category? I really loved both of these.

The Last Kingdom, me lad.

Black Sails

Enriched slavs

Rome, which was better than either of those.

It's not trying to be Game Of Thrones you dopey cunt. It's not like you can't enjoy both either. It's commonly known that they have way less of a budget than GoT too.

The Borgias, The Tudors.

Sub humans that chimp out the moment they stepped in a civilized world.

They also used to raid cities in peloponnesos and killed only women and children and they instantly left when byzantine soldiers came for them.

>I rely on monk sources and WE WUZ KANGZ meme spouters

>vikings never had art
Fly vertically to hell.
>burn their books
Are you fucking dense beyond relief? The christians were the ones burning everything they could get hands on that wasn't relevant to Jesus. If you cite anything from Snorri you should know that you wouldn't know about his works if it wasn't hidden and kept for a long time.

I don't even know what is the drivingforce behind this meme comparing vikings to niggers on this board.

>The Last Kingdom
Does it have negros playing historically white characters?

They were literally snowniggers

Viking age in scandinavia was the same time as the region turned christian.
Since they didn't right a lot about themself it's hard to understand their point of view (pre 800's) but i don't think they were as bad as history tries to portray them.
Basically it's just a bunch of salty catholics that wrote about them and we have to believe it, but desu i don't think it was too bad to turn the north christian, surely calmed the region down (but we should have created our own interpretation of christianity).

>muh racism

Guerilla warfare


snorre was 12th century

and he was writing about people from the 8th century

>vikings never had art. they never had paintings
dude. the norse had a very specific art form. and the written language was with runes, which was replaced by the christians and kept so that only priests were allowed to learn how to read and write

>Basically it's just a bunch of salty catholics
that's what they say about civilized people relative to niggers. They were undeveloped people and Christianity civilized them.

Vikings raided Eastern Europe a shit ton. Even when they discovered how to reach England and France the main bulk of norsemans still went to pillage to the east. They took the wealth and kidnapped hotties. That's why Scandinavian females are top tier. Imagine how rich and advanced the East would be without yearly pillages and kidnappings.

>Without the vikings present Eastern Europe would be the richest part of Europe. WE WUZ ENSLAVED AND SHIT. SCANDINAVIA WAS BUILT ON THE BACKS OF MY PEOPLE. PAY REPARATIONS NORTHERNERS.

it's a BBC production so they don't have to follow hollywood mandatory black quota laws

From what I've learned. Basically vikings were just swedish/danish/finnish sailors who went around raping and pillaging.

make a thread on it ill post some stuff

I rape and pillage your village, women and children. Everybody want to know what my Achilles heel is. Love, I don't get enough of it

anti white shills GTFO!

but you are still raiding us though. our cabins at least




>Christianity made durr civilized n shit
Fuck off, christianity merely united people into empires that would fight another empire. Europeans have been slaughtering each other as long as we have existed regardless of whatever belief-system in place.



lol savage

this is what I was talking about when I meant the norse had a very specific art form though this might also be a fuse of nordic and anglo culture.

>Cred Forums thinks jewish Hollywood tv series are historically accurate wew.

>and women wear "leggings" because they're comfortable
How is something that hugs your lower body more comfy that something like this?

What's this supposed to prove? The Huns also made cool trinkets, how does that make them any less barbarian. It's like defending communism because Stalinist architecture looks good.

There are truly some stupid answers in this thread.
The "Vikings" are not a race. It is a job description for the Norse people in Scandinavia. During the summer months they went raiding as Vikings. Other months they were just traders or farmers. They found all sorts of new settlements in the world. (Ireland, Dublin for example, Iceland, Greenland, Kievan Russ) Sometimes they worked well with the local population, sometimes they did not.

The image of barbarian raiders is a byproduct from christian teaching after the age of vikings. It was the only source, since only preachers could read and write. Hence, most of what we know is biased.

Goddamned. You people are dumb.

Which is why the most elite soldiers of the Byzantine Empire were Vikings, i.e. the Varangian Guard. They were cowardly child killers, but still the best Greece had, right?

Kek "undeveloped". They could travel the world before christians, they had better morals and purer governing styles (even if it was a bit brutal). To say that the nordics were undeveloped just proves the fact that you know nothing about them, viking age (in sweden) was 800-1200, same time that sweden became christian. Nords had been living up there and advancing technologically and spiritually long before the "viking age".


its just butthurt mutts, spics, asians ect. subhumans - jealous that their whatever culture is not getting more attention what than tiny germanic tribes do

Is there any source at all for them being "the best" other than myth?

Also noone called them vikings. They were called Danes, Northmen, Jutes. etc. Word viking is just a word they used to tell their wives that their going raiding.
>Honey im going on a viking.

I think some poet or a writer popularised calling them vikings along with horned helmets

oh, and here comes the "croat". now we need the negro loving "serbian" and we have the whole set

Nordics were traders for the most part. The main commodity was slaves. Dublin in Ireland and Kiev in Ukraine were the primary slave hubs. Slaves or "Thralls" as they are called in the Norse sagas are described as swarthy, short, ugly and stupid, a proto subhuman if you will.

Any movie that portrays vikings as clueless about the existence of the British Isles is blatantly false. Nordics were trading all over Europe for centuries prior. The reason why Viking(raiding) happened is because of Christianity in Central Europe limiting trade with non-Christians.

>vikings never had art
Oh come on
>they never wrote shit down
>the saga of ragnar lothbrok was written hundreds of years after he was dead
Writing isn't the only way of preserving history. To this day hundreds of ancient poems that are related to the Indo-European Rigveda in India are recited orally, just because they weren't written down doesn't mean they aren't taken with historical value.
>the only place religion ever stuck was in Kristiansand, the city furthest south
Kristiansand didn't even exist until the 17th century, furthermore it's the least religious place in the south.

>>Shieldmaidens are 100% allegory.
A hild?, no it were a few of them, but it's before this retarded "le vikingage meme", because england got raided then some age started..... from a culture, thousands years old...
>>Berserkers were more like hired goons for land quarrels.
Not true, there are two main categories, ulfhedner ("wolf heeds"), they were the worst, they wore only a wolf skin, hence the name.

You also got the normal kind. King Harold the first and other kings too typically surrounded them selves by 12 (holy number) bersherks around him.

A normal person could go bersherkergang to (the walk of the bersherk) when taken by a spirit called the bersherksrye. What it means is a state, where you loose control over your body, and this spirit takes control istead. It gives you enormous strenght.

Often you see ther bersherks die soreless after a battle, in sagas it says, it's because they blew their bodies. (IE Eigill Skallgrimsons, Kveldulv his great grandfater dies soreless when they flee the shitrock)

meh should TL;DR this, to early but I think I covered most.

Owwww! That would have hurt!

Yeah they use their own quotas which are way stupider.

Norway needs to bring back Ravnefanen.

Well, not necessarily best in the sense of combat abilities. It's impossible to say anything certain about that. They surely knew how to fight, but of course they were not super humans. We do know that Byzantine emperors kept them as body guards. And the reason for that was likely that the vikings were very loyal and fought to death once they had made the contract.

Aka humans, learn biology

The most romanticized mythos and warrior-society in the world.

And I love it.

We need to reinstate Holmgang as a valid court option again.

Stamford Bridge was a giant mistake

no niggers aren't of ask, they knew this, that's why they called them bluemenn of the "devil".

Here have a 1k+ year old lullaby by Eigill Skallagrimson, My mother told me...
Read the god damn text kek. He was badass, wanna learn? meh start here, not many names.
A real hulk, great poet, viking, runesmith++

You don't what this is, you are all very stupid. Still subverted by christian propaganda.....

i saw this helmet on a history channel documentary a few days ago

it was not a scandinavian helmet but a germanic helmet and the design was entirely stolen from a roman cataphract helmet and made for a germanic king who was buried in a ship underneath a hill

I'm not saying that they made bad mercenaries, but how does that change the fact that they were, for the most part, savage raiders?

>"The average height of men in Norway in the Viking era, based on skeletal measurements, was 176cm (5ft 9in), with a range from 170-181cm (5ft 7in to 5ft 11in), which was taller than other Europeans during this time."

>everything is jewish!
main character is literally a farm boy from melbourne cunt

The upcoming russian movie called simply "viking" could be good.

Then there's Kingdom of Heaven from 2005 which is about the crusades.


They might have been savage raiders, but they certainly knew how to behave as well. You don't get to be bodyguards to an emperor and to live inside the biggest city of Christianity if you chimp out constantly. Or at least that used to be the case.

Ironclad is dope, but not exactly high production value.

jesus christ dont use wikipedia

But what you say is actually true, I'm soon on Harald Hardråde again.
He was warned for his lust by a dream, he should have waited. But tbqh it was unluck and honorles jews, that one arrow when he was out walking before the battle. As the semites they over there, they didn't have the honor to let the battle start for gods sake their Kings didn't even stand in front, they stood in the back like jews. They were not assembled, they were at ships still.

Regardless two weeks later, Villhjalm Ruðajarl comes from Valland, and put a norse King on the English throne. Our right to rule was gone, as Villhjalm was of a proper linage.

Also not that we alsways celebrate how our Kings etc die, because this tells us where they go when they die. Important.

You should always listen to dream signs

Every thread about vikings summed up in one image

>vikings never had art.
the oseberg ship had a lot of fairly intricate carvings along the keel

Also; England was rightfully our clay. Harlad came to take it back, as they once more sat a fucking peasant on the throne, pure mockery, so we had to insert monarchy and make order again.

Kingdom of Heaven is a good movie if you don't care about the content. The content is utter shit. It portrays Europe as a shithole and middle east as a paradise. Which was not the case, it's just another myth. It also portrays Saladin as a good guy, which he most certainly was not. He absolutely hated Christians. It shows a bastard inheriting a county, which would not have been possible. It portrays every character as a cynical Christian, not really believing. That would not have been the case as most crusaders would have been quite fanatic about their religion. It's just so damn devoid of actual history, but at least it looks nice.

Yeah I know. But it's one of the few films where melee combat isn't entirely 100% cringe-worthy.

>all this salt just because they raped your ancestors


i will try and find the history channel video
I don't really think its any form of bias at all, you mostly see the WE WUZ KANGZ meme from anglos (except UK) and somehow that the Scandinavian Vikings were the ultimate niggers of its time. Reeks of rootless sadomasochism and jelly.

i'm a product of vikings cucking the british isles to they're a-ok by me

>tfw i have a red beard
I thought it was only suppose to be the Brits who got raped

Rome was a really good series

shield maiden must've raped a Scotsman or Irishman

They were the emperor's guard because of the corruption that happened with Praetorian guards of emperors before.

Varangian guards, being not Roman, could not assassinate an emperor, or place a new one on the throne because the locals and the imperial army would simply kill them all.

Because Varagians were the emperor's bodyguards, they were given the best equipment. This would make them above average for sure, but there is no proof of them going through imperial training, although I am sure many did. They were foreign mercenaries whose value was that they could hold no political power, and if the emperor died, so might they.

Many leaders did this, throughout history. It was common for arab caliphates to have turk (ghazi) bodyguards for the same reason.

Ancient Athens used to have a non-Greek Scythian police force, but only for partially the same reasons.

Were Varagians the best in the army? Considering that cavalry was more valued and more effective, it is highly unlikely. Clibinarii were the most expensive and only the most noble/capable of Romans could be a part of it. I'd put my money on them.

>since i'm norwegian
no you are not, get out of my fucking country, it's my fisk

this is nigger tier, true nigger tier. You don't know shit. Even niggers like your self, it's a turk! They afraid of this here. Each time you see there is some midsummer fires or something they come out
>oh no no no! CO2
>I don't know why, but I don't like this
>and I don't like this scary music

go fucking gas your self...... you sound like one of them "we have no culture swedes"...

take up a fucking book, go to one of the 6 million stavechurches we got or visit any of the musemusm..


Shitslam hasn't produced other than shit, they just take other peoples advances and claim it as "a muddhist brilliantdiscovery"... it's like why nobody even knows in Iran that all this math etc, came from the greeks, according to them "it's mudslime tech"


not produced shit

Fuck of mudshit skum

Didn't Thor have a big red beard?

Red features have always been common in Scandinavia, just read Germania by Tacitus from the 2nd century, all Scandinavians are described as blond and red.


What? They were called viking latter. During the dark ages. The ones in your image are the same stock as the Goths, who sure as fuck did not get their asses kicked everywhere.

As for the vikings getting their ass kicked everywhere, where do you get this information from?

>Weren't a people
They were of the same ancient culture.
>They got to the Americas by accident
As with most discoveries of Islands. You don't know where it is before you discover it, you moron.
>They more or less got their asses kicked in open combat.
Not all armies are equally good at all things. And your statement isn't true as an absolute.
>Shieldmaidens are 100% allegory.
Yes. Women next to never, if at all fought in combat with the vikings.
>Berserkers were more like hired goons for land quarrels.
Yes, there were some who were like that, but not all.
>They didn't have horned helmets.
Of course not.

Could you fuck off once in a while? I mean, nobody understands a flying fuck out of anything that you are rambling about.

Check this out

But what people leaves out due to christian and roman propaganda, part present in the anglo world view.

It was the romans and later christians that got rekt, because they fucked with wrong people. And they were the aggressors not us, this started before your Jesus.... There is a reason danevirket was built, yes they lit built wall against germany.... they should not have torn that down....

fucking romans, lets fucking destroy it again and give the pope "orneklaffer".

no this is false
Thor had red hair and beard, Eirik Bloodaxe had red hair...... I can go on

>brown eyes
>brown hair


Do you know some other good reads about the Saxons or pre-Christian Germanic tribes? Everything is about Anglo-Saxons when you try to find shit about the Saxons.


No replies. Holy shit. Wait...

The architecture was simple because it had to be in the north. Tall structures are hard to cover in earth for insulation. Their constructs were, however not as simple as you might think. Long huts, although covered in earth, are not to be compared with mudhuts, for a sturdy wooden structure lies beneath.

Their food was what was available. Not much different to the rest of Europe.

Their weapons were made of comparatively decent quality, and were often decorated quite nicely. What is different between that and the rest of Europe?

Their fashion wasn't even that bad. The battle gear is dope and the normal gear was as good as your pockets are heavy.

What's wrong with the runic alphabet?

Their art wasn't even bad. It was mostly sculptural and structural, but not at all bad. They were good craftsmen.

As for viking philosophers, the authors of the Eddas and poems would be the equivalent.

Well, the vikings built this thousands of years before the pyramids, so yeah.

This is the third time I see you posting, can you please shut your mouth you fucking autist. Du setter oss i et dårlig lys, bare la være å poste om du skal oppfore deg som kanadierne. Drep deg selv.

Jordanes, a Goth living Rome wrote a lot about Germanic customs and history, check out Getica, it's absolutely fascinating

>vikings go to muslim spain
>get the shit kicked out of them
>vikings go to japan
>get the shit kicked out of them
>vikings go to greece
>get the shit kicked out of them
>vikings go to angloland
>get the shit kicked out of them
>vikings go to france
>actually win something for once
>eventually learn how to not attack everybody
>quietly assimilate into places they once fought
>modern swedes thinks they're vikings despite having nothing to do with them

there you go, viking history

have a look at this faggot
It's not about, it about who YOU hail from. You don't take credit from other peoples work!

Look at this pic, this is just a random pic from a female icenigger... "Excuse me I am the great grand(x24) daughter of Eigil, and .........."

Now you would think this was exceptional? No everybody there knows their lineage like this, and can recite it to you, til the farm they came from here.

>We wuz wikangz cuz cuz cuz cuz my grandparents(I barely know the name of) was 1/4 danish and 3/4 niggers

I am sorry you don't got any roots, instead of bitching about it. I am talkinig to all fags in here that are this clueless about the culture. Track your linage on your branch of Yggdrasil (represents mankind and the stemfather ask(ash the tree) of all mankind after him)

>christians, like animals they hardly know their own grand parents...
actual quote

>this vinglish

And people say American education is bad.

>tfw saw the last kingdom
great show i cant wait for the next season man i did really enjoy vikings as well though

oh dear some sphjellings.. yeah you tonguebound me there christian....

Is this is reddit now, are you all gonna dress up and run around like children and yelling "we wuz wikangz"


Do you idiots even understand that this word viking, basically means pirate. The ignorance....

listening to you faggots makes me realize the whole germanic/nordic delusion. jerking off to a past that didn't exist.

he says while he wears a hat that says MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN

Thanks fæm, I ordered Germania by Tacitus like a week ago. Book-store had to order it from some international retailer.

I can trace my direct patrilineal line back to Florence, Italy c.860AD (though we relocated to England just prior to 1100).

i kek'd. they also had naval technology that made it to america 500 years before that douchefag columbus did though.

we're gonna make heathen TL;DRs soon, once Donald is in office. We also need to track his lineage, we might find something there.

Pic? Illustration of Odin would appear to his enemies on the battlefield. This spaniard or whatever he is, he actually fuckings knows his shit

Actually, Vikings originate from Russia.

Eventually expanded to other places like Sweden, which today likes to take credit for that.

If you note, present day Russians are still as much Jackass as Vikings were described back in those days. Just youtube what happened when some Eritreans pirates tried to hijack a Russian ship in Africa.

In Istanbul, Vikings did a graffiti of their names on Sophia Cathedral. If you go to Istanbul today, you still see a huge number of Russians doing business with Turks. Nothing really changed much, just Swedes thinking they were vikings.




Are you a former meth-addict?

Please fuck off.

Swedish Vikings literally founded Russia.

>literally WE WUZ the country

Getica-user, this one?


Going to Iceland this week. I hear it's overflowing with Feminists.

Does this mean it should be super easy to get Icelandic pussy or are they going to try and cuck me?

atleast ours makes a small amount of sense because of the geographical proximity and the ancient architecture leftovers that we have on our territory

meanwhile americans claim to be
at the same time


Holy shit, you're retar-
>checks flag
Ah nevermind. Carry on, mutt.

They fucked up England so bad that they still have leftovers in their language today

This. And DEY WUZ also injuns & shiieeet.

>FYROM still talking

I'm honored.

>10 bales of hay have been deposited into your yurt by G. Khan

hey flag, an bretlender told us to tear those down.
I think we should take him on the tongue, and do it.

>London Bridge is falling down, falling down....

he didn't know what into the meanings of those three swords kek


Check a map and an history book.

Russia maintains the same import/export and thug mentality. Swedes got enriched.


I'm also a redhead and tall (1m87) living in a town founded by vikings who where on their way to fuck up laetitia (former paris), I'm also living in a region where the ancient Celts held of the Roman armies.
This town was also the place where the third battle of Ypres was fought during ww1.