/brit/

hostile occupation edition

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youtube.com/watch?v=29UMACdfyZw
youtube.com/watch?v=sY3rIlrTTh8
youtube.com/watch?v=QBPbAzrPFmE
desuarchive.org/int/thread/54709653/#54709663
youtube.com/watch?v=9MYMF4Sn7Mo
youtube.com/watch?v=Lcvb5emB4AE
youtube.com/watch?v=-zW66rb4D6I
youtube.com/watch?v=gyWV-bL9-oc
i.4cdn.org/fit/1474254301274.webm
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

anime

anime

it would be funny if the janny forced us to use this thread

youtube.com/watch?v=29UMACdfyZw

youtube.com/watch?v=sY3rIlrTTh8

Released today and already 1.5 million views

America, explain this shit

who will help the widow's son?

*burns down the white house*

O SAY CAN YOU SEE

no thanks

Any Brits or Irish got a job they could give me?
Preferably enough to pay for accommodation if it's far way too.

karen lads

>Cred Forums is LITERALLY impacting the election for the most powerful person in the world

why can't /brit/ ever do anything meaningful?

Just wanked off to a gorgeous tranny on Chaturbate

Came onto my feet for a change

*declares independence*

Unlucky Siobhan

lmao @ ur life

potato famine

...

sorry m8 I'm looking for a new job but cant get one. My job is shite but I'm stuck with it for now

on the bus

Haha btfo by Janny

Hahaha

...

at least we'll always have this

what the fuck user

Did a chuckle.

aha twat

Good to know

...

My life will never be as sad as a cunt who deletes threads on Cred Forums...for free

would quite like to shag one of the sky girls

>he deleted his post
HAHAHAHAHA

going on holiday is quite expensive, lads

...

Bet ye Wish ye still had America ye Bastards.

SAVE ME LADS THE JANNY BLOCKED ME AND NOW I'LL BE BANNED

HELP

Wanted to a do a wank but then I listened to a nice song and now I don't want to wank anymore.

What happened there lads?

>walking down street after gym
>feeling good
>group of dudes drive by and yell out " nice tank top, faggot"
>drive away

absolutely fuming now

Haha who did this?
youtube.com/watch?v=QBPbAzrPFmE
desuarchive.org/int/thread/54709653/#54709663

What's her safe working load?

where you off to lad

you done for lad

bet she directs a mcdonalds the fat cunt

W E W
E
W

chilli is taking ages to boil off

anywhere lad
hotels seem to make up for the bulk of the cost

angry fatties I assume

>rping with iGF
>she starts talking about the real life guy she almost had sex with

>yanks

Food's arrived and so have I

Why do people feel the need to tweet about everything

angry fatties I assume

25k used

did you offer to massage their willies at least?

>igf

I love my brit girl!

you should look into airbnb too lad

got my first plastic fiver today lads
they feel a bit weird, don't they?

good to have you with us tonight James

you are posting this in the thread where people literally feel the need to make an announcement every time they move their bowels or go to the shops

>iGF

End yourself

My coworkers are trying to get me fired or to quit by making my life hell

how awful for the environment
bit miffed you accepted it

>baby faced
>show up at party mate invited me to
>walk in
>girl says, who invited the 16 year old?
>people laugh

...

my name is Celtic and meme tier

on this note, am about to poo

angry fatties I assume

my gimmick

what did you do

i've already pooed twice today lad and its only 230pm

crease

>tfw anti-depressants are working
>tfw normality is wretched as I'm constantly bumping my nose up against the cage a decade without diagnosis has built for me
>tfw I want to drop my medication because the dull, chronic misery of depression is easier to handle
It'd be like going back to the real normality and my dinner of boiled and salted potatoes wouldn't seem so bad then.

wasn't starting on a cash machine lad

>life may be a quarter finished already
>that's if I don't die prematurely in an accident

fucking hell

we do it ironically lad

I'm pooing in public right now

That was really unkind of them

no we don't
it started off ironic, now we just blog our mundane lives

is there anything more runty than anti-depressants? fucking pathetic

boo hoo tfw no gf

get a fucking life you total weapons

take remeron or whatever they're called lad, good shit

I'm going to meme for eternity and nothing will stop me

going to shit down the shop anyone want owt

Eating lunch and waiting for the plumber lads

>23
>haven't accomplished a thing in my life

can't wait for the sweet embrace of death as I shrug off this mortal coil tbqhwymf

*escapes from my runt page*

French bird is double messaging me lads, clawed it back

Factory

Of course, the people I work with are hateful troglodytes who thrive on negativity and always need to see somebody suffer in order to feel good about their disgracefully wasted lives, but still

get us some tangy toms and a will to live ta

there's some change by the door x

why are motorbike riders such scum?

>why yes my good fellow, verily I do rate kanye albums post-graduation

...

what do people do during those 10+ hour layovers in airports?

do you sleep in the airport?

buy me a cornetto and shit on it

Nice background...

NOT

What out Fred's about

MY NAME IS user
POSTER OF SHIT
BEHOLD MY MEMES, YE MIGHTY, AND DESPAIR!

might post the gf's flat chest so you all have to see the same thing I see every day

Chucklesome.

Cola bottles

hahahaha that fucking background

bet you instagrammed it with some shite caption like "jetting off" or "#wanderlust"

bellsniff

>>why yes my good fellow, verily I do rate kanye albums post-graduation

...

Get pissed usually

o my days

>kanye was ever good

I'm on Citalopram. It's started working consistently and very well after almost two years now. The trouble is coping with "normal" while having no reason to wake. I could blow away without notice as I'm practically without root in this world.

do it again bomber harris

got my cock and balls completely slathered in vaseline and I'd edging my load to YouTube vids of Rachel

The six things I could never do without
Music
Food
Something to drink
Technology (basically for work and projects)
Stability
Common sense

So true lads!

v. good lad

perfection

Me on the left

post some links
have you seen a therapist?

might head to homebase tomorrow and pick up a treat that my tender plums will really enjoy

actually is true had to train the gf about this

while the slags I cheated on her with seem to be naturals

fuck off shitizen

but it's the same girl :\

*holds your hand*

I hate the entitled cunts, if they start tailing me I slow down and put my arm out to get them to fuck off

There are no black people, just people without any white.

are there ever any actual discussions in /brit/ or is it all just memes?

For two years. Almost nine years late. I think we're almost making progress.

>airbnb

ah yes. normie hotels

>might head to homebase tomorrow

need a regular cuddle buddy

>tfw you make a witty reddit post and it bangs

Fuck off EU scum

A lump hammer or some fertilizer?

ahh, yes the plumber is here.

*guides you to my sink and tells you the problem*

thread theme for those that don't know: youtube.com/watch?v=9MYMF4Sn7Mo

Literally my gf

Unironically prefer the right one

Seems more like a horny dog

*bashes you with the lads*
Heh..... nothing personnel......

what do you want to discuss?xx

t. scrubdan polanski

fucking hell. gf found out about my side piece

spoiler the hog

you now remember (the?) arcade fire

Honestly I think people on /brit/ are actually quite intelligent.

Or at least they know a lot. Some of the jokes here are quite clever, even if they are behind a lot of irony layers.

this

>brit calling anyone scum

Alri Tom

>nose ring

Didn't they just release a new single?

Ps: it's Arcade Fire

Ah yes, awful. One of the worst tragedies in Grimsby's history.

*whispers in your ears*
you're fucked now

>le lazy geniuses meme

me on the right

doing a poo

The entirety of Cred Forums is above average intelligence

The website acts as a filtering system

business idea: /brit/post when I'm visiting the Danish gf so my posts get more recognition due to the foreign flag

hnnnnnnnnggggggggggnnnnnehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhfffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

*splatters the bowl with high velocity guiness skitter*

Shitter's clogged again
*looks up from newspaper*
Hmm? oh yes, it's out back
*points with thumb*

great post

my gf is hotter

>tfw when probably the smartest person in the room at any given time, but so lazy I've ever reach my full potential

>Sorry, this content isn't available at the moment

Roo

What to watch on Netflix?

leave commie GFs to me

>"""communist"""
>iPhone
ah yes

I agree. I mean shit like seems dumb as fuck but you'd actually need to know things to be able to make that joke in the first place.

It's like taking clever things and dumbing them down. Weird.

everyone on Cred Forums thinks they are smart underachievers

boggles the mind at how someone can have such a nice body and yet be SO butters

Shut the fuck up and fix my sink polski

*rubs a pin with a mixture of my earwax, belly button fluff, urine and spunk before sticking it into an effigy of you*

...

what's your favorite jojo part, lads

Shaka, when the walls fell.

>Tfw
ONE OF US

I have eleven potatoes, a few shrively auld carrots and a tube of oats to get me to next week.
Maybe if you chiseled some of the paint off and removed some of the metal bits these girls would be nice to hold hands with but as is they're looking like they've questionable history; like say, if you were to tabulate the number of dicks they've tickled with their uvulas do you think we'd be at a combined double or triple digit number?

was shocked to see how smart people on Cred Forums are when I went to /his/

A lot of people on Cred Forums ARE smart underachievers.

*goes to toilets at work*
*stuffs a ball of gloves down toilet*
*squats over the bowl and unleashes a storm of vindaloo and Heineken fire and brimstone
*flushes it 6 times*
*walks up angrily to the nearest polish person
*grabs them by the ear*
*points at the toilets*

business idea: write a porno based on 'come dine with me' called 'cum dine with me' where all the participants have sex and go on about melons and sausages etc.

howling

>humanities
>smart
screeching

yesterday I had a full joint after never having tried weed before and I got so anxious I started sobbing uncontrollably. very embarrassing

Unironically haven't got past Diamond is Unbreakable yet
Battle Tendency was probably my favourite so far tho

>supporting the bourgeois capitalist pigs who profit off the backs of slave labour in third world countries
Disgraceful that is, would purge her very soon after the revolution 2bh

what should i watch on netflix?

Steel Ball Run easily

pt 2, though I am loving diamond is unbreakable

Jessica Jones

Why would you smoke an entire J if you've never smoked before?

Janny and user at the new thread

Generic shitty movie #47239

Whoever was the usa flag in the 196 countries thread,the one that painted it,PLS HELP ME I DONT WANNA PAINT SHIT
I FUCKING REVIVED IT

cause I'm a fucking retard?

Animeonly detected
honestly the anime has been high quality so far though the fight with DIO was better in the 90s OVA

*turns around*
hm? err about 20 to mate
*turns back around*

my nigger

/brits/ are so easy to bait

free (You)s

imagine being a professional footballer with a hog gf

dark days

Oh user, be nice.

99% of jokes on Cred Forums which aren't on Cred Forums require an above average level of general knowledge.

>jojofags on /brit/

thought i'd never see the day

Sounds like it
Did you enjoy the feels once you calmed down a bit?

Anyone else watching the SAS thing on Channel 5?

Absolute madmen the lot of them

just spunked into a tissue lads

youtube.com/watch?v=Lcvb5emB4AE

l a d s

Jojo is huge now

do you not believe in true love

bet she's beautiful on the inside x

my parcel is here :-)

Lads, when you go down on one of these, do you get a horrible pain in your stomach which makes you want to suicide?

Hmmmmmmmm why do I have a yank flag

Are you a proxie?

no

not anime only, I'm just reading too much stuff to keep up with everything
Currently reading Toriko, Seven Deadly Sins, Boku no Hero Academia, Jojo, and a few other things

Bet she is an absolute profligate in bed

Yeah I think that too. 90% of people are here are reasonably intelligent feckless cynical cunts.

using flux and cannot distinguish between the french and irish flags in candle mode

no i just felt anxious the rest of the evening then went to bed

no, I get slight orgasm

Do you know what that word means?

Doesn't like 90% of Cred Forums proxy now?

t. yank

ah alright, was just teasing.
Jojo is long as fuck anyways

Camps I went to in school had something similar to that, though it was just a single person in a harness. Vomited afterwards every time I went up 2bh

No, haven't got a clue

Maybe I'm about to get V& by the FBI

>match loads of very cute girls on tinder and bumble
>picture myself falling in love with them and taking them on dates and traveling with them
>end up never messaging any
>still alone

No because the free ones are banned.

>candle
bit much m8

Smoking a zoot of fat proportions, drinking tea all the while listening to the classics of American country

Merle heggard, glen Campbell, marshal tucker band and other classic composers

I don't think you could beat it with a stick my friend

this bird that wants my willy (has done for the past five years and knows i know she wants it) goes on week long stretches of ignoring me
why do women do this, lads

literally me

apart from sometimes i do message them and they turn out to be boring

;_;

Bummer

Smoke less and chill with a cool crowd next time

Me and the lads ahaha not gay ahah x

tinder girls are sluts
stick to real life

Yeah and in my nads t bh

The nads are itchy

me a few thousand kilometres away in the back

oh right hahaha
thought you were doing a mean

montreal mentioned

>No because the free ones are banned.
Check out VPNGate. The newer VPNs are usually not banned.

Or just subscribe to a VPN, most of them are less than $3 a month now.

>sushi

FUCK OFF BILLIONAIRE

Rip.

i was scared of this so i never went on it

fuck off elliot rodger

its amazing what these cunts will do after a few 3.5% carslbergs

absolute warheads them

>kilometres

Fucks sake youtube red trial is expiring soon

Get out of my general, yank.

You made your choice in Boston.

>that cold night air

>left wing
>irish flag
>celtic scarf
>the cure
>leftist

would be able to chat this slag up and bed her in a couple of hours, tops

Kilometres > miles any day of the week my laaaad

That feeling is the best desu

oh no you'll miss out on those terrible web shows

>kilometres

thought my net was down for a second there

Nawww dick

why dont you lift weights, /brit/?

and no you dont lift my mum

Get a Cred Forums pass it won't matter if it's banned

t. brit

>Kilometres

Women are psycopaths. They are like that kid who enjoys kicking his puppy.

>kilomeerretrereresesters

make up your minds, bongs

lads this stupid cat wont stop meowing outside my windows so i ran outside and booted the fucker over the fence

felt fucking great

little runt wont be meowing any time soon

where are his legs on the left?

You enjoyed it? If I left my eyes open then I would get horrible pain when it went down, although I crave more

It feels like someone is trying to scoop your insides out

>Miles
get with the time gramps

The so called

'''''''''''''''''''''''''''g'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''f'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

youtube.com/watch?v=-zW66rb4D6I

I do

youtube.com/watch?v=gyWV-bL9-oc

what did he mean by this?

How do I take a mirror selfie type ting for tinder without looking like a massive bellsniff?

haven't eaten in 24 hours and starting to feel really terroble, gonna have some tendons with sriracha, ah can't wait until that microwave beeps

>key-lows

>>kilomeerretrereresesters
>
>make up your minds, bongs

>be rich
>eat butterball chicken

wew

called this runt a fucking cunt and he said hes phoning his mum on me

bit scared

he's carrying my castrated bollocks there

Would have thought I'd have figured this out by now desu

>Driving on the left side of the road

...

doing a skip an important event haha

that black guy in the swoosh shirt is gonna shoot him calling it now

he's not clapping anything he just looks annoyed and twitchy

looks comfy

going to put on a pair of socks just for the comfy feeling

Yeah, it was pretty much the only decent thing at gulliver's world

state your case for having the most dismal life on /brit/

So we can do this with our dominant hands out of the window, whilst still maintaining control of the automobile

lads

was doing the weekly shop when I needed a big shit so I popped into the gents and just decided to take a shit on the floor

sucks whatever wageslave has to clean my mess up haha

post pics haha

it's my fetish, but at the same time slag detector

I have a sensible, soft, caring side but also love letting my hair down n being daft. I don't take myself too seriously.

>Howdy, you're absolutely right m'lady! I am an American, and I come from the verdant and most exquisite city called Detroit.

lel

God tier: rankines
Meh tier: celcius
Shit tier: fartenheight

the gf has a daddy kink lads
the reasons for binning her are piling up

What is the scariest film you have ever seen?

why lol

>Pakiboo's legs will never be this thin and soft-looking
>Pakiboo will always be just another stunted man
Always a laugh

I think he's just baked tbf

fucking lunacy

Me in the hat

hello u cunt

>using anything other than Kelvin

absolutely pathetic

We need to go back to the EEC only

I'm making a new thread 20 posts early.

>God tier: rankines

21
Kissless virgin
No Friends since 14
No College
No Uni
No Job
Been on the dole since 18
5'8
5 inch dick
Never had a smartphone
Never been drunk in my life
Dont smoke
Never done illegal drugs

Hot Tub Time Machine 2

The fact that people put their names on that piece of shit proudly is terrifying.

Ur mum's sex tape

>Kelvin

Addendum to my list
Alright tier: kelvin

haha

>>using anything other than Kelvin

>absolutely pathetic

...

trying to elucidate formulae for psychedelic geometries

>paying 30k for a piece of paper

good lad

27
kissless virgin
no mates
still live at home
manlet
man tits
ginger beard

you're probably making half this up

>Kelvin

Rec

what exactly is 'a sesh' lads?

I wish lad

gf gone and uploaded this even though i told her not to

i.4cdn.org/fit/1474254301274.webm

a smoking session is in order.

do it hehe

a heroin injecting session

how the hell have you never been drunk before?

not going to click on this

thicc

are you fat?

We need to go back to the Marshall plan only.

trustfund stick for 'session' but often used to refer to smoking weed
please don't tell me this bile has spread across the pond

God tier: rigatoni
Good tier: penne, shells
Dece tier: mem pasta like wheles and shit
Shit tier: macaroni, spaghetthi

Most disgusting thing I've ever seen

new

I'm black and this girl is my dream girl

>No Friends since 14
how was secondary school?

>tfw no asylum demon gf

literally the gf
her body does not excite

...

*repeals obamacare*

how is it possible to have such an immense arse and a normal torso/arms

5mg etiz, up the shit chute

Injections of runt fluid