You have 12 seconds to pretend to be Polish

>Japan is the only country in the world with four seasons

We're in central european >:(

>~80% of ppl in this thread will get no bigos after saying this...

How can we help them?

I don't hate the Russian people, actually I've met Russians who were swell guys, it's just that when they get the marching orders from their government...

Why pretend? I'd be proud to be Polish.

>*shits pants*
??

O KURWA *pukes and passes out*

>O KURWA *pukes and passes out*
You would get alcohol poisoning if you had to drink with a pole.

Jokes on you I've done it. We both collapsed. Absinthe is helluva stuff. You guys are pretty good drinkers tho I give you that.

Also that Russians however nice they are personally have no capacity for critical thinking or questioning authority. like you know, saying to themselves "Hey, it's not a very nice thing to deport or execute all Polish scientists, teachers, and doctors."

>Absinthe

fuck russia kurwa

Pffft, child's play until you tried Bacardi 151.

Fuck off, I already have to pretend to be polish. Do you have any fucking idea how hard it is to wear human meatsuit everyday?

IT IS FUCKING DISGUISTING.

Oh kurwa, I sure love love buying packs of the cheapest beer after a hard day of picking strawberries. I hope Janus doesn't go drunk driving again because he barely got away with flattening those two todlers the other day

Hello, I am Polish. Nice to meet you

przepraszam Niemcy

*moves to UK*
*claims unemployment benefit while working for cash in hand at below minimum wage*
*sends most of the money home to shitland*

ah yes, a wonderful people to have inva- immigrate to your country

That's for 1939-1990

I'm sorry. We wouldn't have become so bydlo if certain sociopathic neighbors of ours didn't liquidate our entire educated class and only leave behind uncultured farmers and coal miners.

>75%

Hmm. Sound weak. This is what hardcore bois drink.

Mы были вeнды и кypвa

better us than Pakis

Spierdalaj, żółty pies.

I miss PZPR

barely, just barely.

hehe

>Mы были вeнды и кypвa
??

I know senpai, only the true bydlos come here to work on the fields. I actually like Poland. Plus the drunk Poles who visited the bar I worked in were pretty much always up for bantz

Mmmuh Katyn Forest mmmmuh Pope.

...

My byly wendy i kurwa in fake Russian

>For what Germans and Soviets did
Poles are such retards.

You stupid fuck.
Our language is a different branch, older and more complex than Russian.

>can't tell if he is going along with the thread theme or being serious

Slavs and Celts are said to have above-average alcohol tolerance. Amerindians have below average tolerance.

Sure, it totally isn't in the same family

lol

Na zdrowie, my name is Pan Kenowski
I'm a 27 year old American hussar (winged knight for you bydlos). I charge tanks on my tablet, and spend my days perfecting plumbing techniques and playing superior Polish games (drinking, drinking and Witcher series)
I train with my lance every day, this superior weapon can pierce clean through tanks because it has plumbed over a thousand toilets, and is vastly superior to any other weapon on earth. I earned my lance license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak Polish fluently, both Kurwa and Silesian dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about Polish history and their mustache code, which I follow 100%
When I get my Polish visa, I am moving to Warsaw to attend a prestigious Liceum to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a programmer for CD Project RED or a plumber!
I own several hussar wings which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to Poland, so I can fit in easier. I yell kurwa at my elders and seniors and speak Polish as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.

Not true, Slavs are lightweights in reality. They can only handle a few beers before they start getting drunk.

Both.

"During his 1959 visit to the US, Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev challenged American actor John Wayne to a drinking contest. The result was a tie."

Guys my refrigerator is too full of kielbasa, there's no room for any beer! Will Jesus be mad at me?

lol'd hard
your beers are water tier
not to mention average anglo passes out after like 3-4 shots of vodka

Buy good wódka and put it into freezer

I am an Italiophile
It's a Me!!!

Though in all fairness, they were both old dudes and probably didn't have as high alcohol tolerance as a 25 year old has.

ryztrzzryryzrzytrztyzrtgyrtrzrzwtrwtcrztrtcrtcrztrzyztezyztezeytzetyzetwiczezcezcz

I work in a factory with a bunch of Slavs, I know for a fact you lot cannot handle your drink. Drunk in a few beers, pathetic.

Jesus would forgive you since Japan is magnificent to be only country in the world with four seasons.

stop talking out of yer arse

I'm talking from the reality of seeing Slavs drink.

well, you westerners literally die after drinking while we can handle it

I live in Vilnius.

>Drunk in a few beers, pathetic.
>I'm talking from the reality of seeing Slavs drink.
no proofs

>Live in England
>Work in a factory
>Implying I have not known hundreds of Slavs by now

next time drink something stronger with them

if germans and russians didn't backstab us we would be the masters of the world!

I drank several Ukranians under the table during the month I was there.
In contrast I only had to be helped back to the apartment once
I was unimpressed by the reality of slavic vodka tolerance. They don't even drink it straight as myth has it. They chase it with pop or beer

>country who thinks he was major part of the P-L Commonwealth when really they were just dumb peasants we used as source of bodies for the army

Ukrainians and Russians don't count as slavs.

they're tatat mutts

>a german emulates other languages with a word THIS long

do you even realise that?

Djin dobre

I see

Yes Poland is great

Fuck Russia.

Literally the Poles were peasants, Januszku.

Nobility was Lithuanian-Ruthenian
City class, clergy & merchants were Jews and Germans
While guess who Polacks were? That's right, moustached dumb peasants.

We have moonshine here. A Polish coworker told me during gommie times the gommies jacked the alcohol tax and everyone was making it in their kitchens.

Nowadays it's still popular to make moonshine. It's much better and tastier to drink than vodka from a shop.

>this is what Lithuanians actually believe
Oh, hope you're enjoying your visit to Warsaw, Antanas.

>Japan is the only country in the world with four seasons

It's not what Lithuanians believe but historical truth. Educate yourself.

>pretend

Yes it's no different than some other countries like Hungary where the nobles were Romanian, the bourgeois and clergy were Jews/Germans, and Hungarians were just redneck farmers.

t. dumb peasant

Hi i moved to Chicago 2 years ago. I shop exclusively in polski skelps and superior polish delis. I work for a trailer repair company and know many short cuts on how to do each job. I drink only polish beers and beat up Mexicans while dating their women

>I'm not Romanian i swear

t. mini me Finland

I love Poland great country we are wends not slavic hurr hussars fucking west full of subhuman degenerate but polan stronk and pure polan christ of nations od morza do morza gib kiev please come to poland refugees gtfo

fuck russia lol shithole subhuman slavs fuck russia heil america glory to poland fucking russians

>Nobility was Lithuanian-Ruthenian
yeah and there was no Polish nobility and that's why we had great laws for nobility that guaranteed equality and that's why Lithuanian nobleman wanted to join commonwealth to get those rights that didn't exist because there was no Polish nobility. Yeah everything makes sense now.

Russia? REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Dindu nuffin, the Mongolians keepin the Pole man down

We wuz almost, once

In what way are West Slavic languages older and more complex?

Buongiorno, signore e signori!

WENDS NOT SLAVS

CENTRAL EUROPE

FUCK RUSSIA

DELET THIS

>Nobility was Lithuanian-Ruthenian
>City class, clergy & merchants were Jews and Germans
ayy lmao

marcel's back

Kurwa

Kurwa

Vodka

gib work

Drink this wodka boy and help me beat up this fucker who got smug with our women!

ale jak teraz wstystky! Ja ten Bulbasza pierdolem, kurwa!

*moves to UK*