/brit/

i feel your pain bro. i haven't gotten my dick wet in nearly 2 weeks

Alri mate, don't get many Estonians in /brit/

sure so long as they weren't super anal
its not like they will change my opinions or anything.

It's not like we'd have any similarities. All lefties I've known have been abrasive and annoying.

Just a sleazy fuck, nod along with her rubbish.

change from one edge to the other? Not hard lad.

Messaged four other so called "cheap shags" to see if they want to go out tonight so my putting clothes on won't have been wasted, but two haven't replied and two don't want to come out to shag

I fancy their lorries, but the rest of that country can just kindly fuck off.

destroying my tongue with toxic waste again

>I reckon I could change their stupid views desu

wew

...

Really like ghost in the shell. Wanna find a way to work on cybernetics and stuff, looks cool.

Not really going to another edge, it's just he stopped with the whole 'a world without borders would solve everything' and all that shit.

>stop off at the paki shop on the way home from work yesterday
>as I contemplate my choices in the beer section I notice the man next to me
>something seems really strange about him but I can't quite put my finger on it
>behind him in the queue
>he enquiries if they have any [some meme ale] in the yankiest accent ever
Literally burst out laughing lads, it doesn't happen often but yanks really do make me howl when I see them irl

why the fuck didn't janny delete this thread

do not understand that twat sometimes

its probably already too late
should have made that decision before starting high school

fixed the keyboard's layout?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Help:IPA_for_Alemannic_German
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Help:IPA_for_German

FUCK OFF RUNTS

You're right it was a fedora post, deleted it desu

Bit of smoke and some beers tonight.

And you?

Torys improved
Labour improved*
Lib Dems got worse
UKIP got worse
Greens improved
SNP improved

*debatable

problematic picture

saw too much jfs outside today
not a fucking fan

ah yes so-called "northern ireland"

calling the police for an unrelated matter

why can't Brits handle beer for shit but the Welsh can

hmmm

No, I'm an actual Jerry.

Also the official international reaction to Australia:
youtube.com/watch?v=-GIJQLc-Ntw&t=166

>at car boot today
>two yanks talking about whether to buy a pot off a bloke

It's so weird seeing and hearing them irl. It's like they're an actor or something, they seem so unnatural.

It's like when you're watching an American TV programme and there's a Brit, it brings you back to reality and suddenly the Brit seems like the only normal person there and everyone else is fake.

Going to be driving about 190 miles tonight to London in order to see some relatives.

I've only been driving just over a week and haven't done a journey of further than 45 minutes.

Can anyone give me some tips? I'm fine in the dark but I've only done minimal motorway stuff. I'm hoping it's going to be pretty quiet. I have a sat-nav too.

ahh the so called british female

going on facebook is like going to the zoo sometimes

got a date with a bird who's 4 years older than me tomorrow lads

wish me luck

>that soundtrack.
youtube.com/watch?v=OwdlqquJDK4
youtube.com/watch?v=Ep1yzAw2Vb8

dont die

the lions are killing a buffalo on safari live right now guys

i've been watching this for months to see this

how do you make the video start at a specific point when embedded into Cred Forums?

You'll get tired and have lapses in concentration, are you driving at night? I wouldn't desu.

sounds like my type of bird desu

get a masters degree in computer science and try to find a professor who's doing research in that area. do your thesis on it. by the time you graduate you'll have enough relevant stuff on your resume that you'll be able to get a job in the field.
it's also important to listen to appropriate choons while doing so
youtube.com/watch?v=hfUSyoJcbxU

Can't imagine why no one would want to go out with her.

horny

There's a paki family in my area for the first time ever. Very unhappy with this.

>It's like when you're watching an American TV programme and there's a Brit, it brings you back to reality and suddenly the Brit seems like the only normal person there and everyone else is fake.

How mind numbingly autistic are you exactly?

>I'm really good at
>watching TV

Petal to the metal lad

>hobbies
>netflix

I keep seeing this but didn't even know netflix was popular in the UK.

These girls have thoroughly uninteresting lives.

It's a bit bland but she sounds lovely mate

thats prolly satirical

Bit late for that desu, I'm already out of university. However I do work in the semiconductor industry, just gotta find something going on on the materials side of things rather than the design side.

did the janitor really leave this early thread up?

I live about 25 minutes from Rotherham and most of the surrounding towns here have got no pakis at all, then you go into Rotherham and its just an infestation.

t. Yank from the paki shop

Mind numbingly

Okay

>are you driving at night?
No mate by 'tonight' I meant tomorrow morning

Shan't be doing this

Fucking shite advice

yeah don't be such a massive pussy.

nobody expects you to be a perfect driver from the get go after passing, and although it's good you're not overconfident, some level of confidence is key. not trying to be rude.

keep to the left hand lane on the m25. watch out for cyclists in london. whereabouts are you going and i'll try to be more specific..

That's creggan lad, grew up there
Horrible place i love it

codeword for sex innit

>those fingernails

doing a little chunder haha x

>Current top 40 music

Older sister literally just got pregnant for the seventh time lads. She's 32 now, popped out the first lad when she was 23 (they have five sons and a daughter at the moment)

Meanwhile I'm 27 and childless. Fuck's sake, I will now have SEVEN nephews and nieces to buy presents for.

Asked her husband if he's ever heard of condoms as banter and he said he's never used one and doesn't plan to start.

no worse than a guy who's """hobby""" is videogames

Piss off, I posted before reading your post properly desu

In that case have a red bull before you go

might go for a run

Bent my bloody debit card.

Just drive, keep your eyes on the road and keep a sensible distance from the car in front. What advice can anyone give you here? Fcuk off you teenage little shit

i think there's nothing objectively wrong with durham and that you're all just messing with me

Going to Southgate

I get loads of cyclists around by me so I'm used to it

*flags you*

Netflix and video games is better than just Netflix.

It may be autistic but at least it's something remotely different.

I have a daughter desu because I also hate condoms and primarily date Catholics

>c'est la vie
Are the irish frenchaboos?

suits its owner

he's waiting for this one to get to 150+ posts and everyone to close to the old one

then he strikes, to piss the most people off

>blah is bad
>YEAH BUT BLAH IS JUST AS BAD

Calm down Pierrette.

If a bloke has his hobby as
>drinking and watching footy wiv the lads lol
is just as shit

your sister is the saviour of the white race

having kids is extremely selfish

Add "&t=" to the end and then the absolute time in seconds or you write "5m30s" for a 5 min, 30 sec start.

Alternatively you can pause a video at any time, right click on it and then click "Copy video URL at current time".

Rasheed

The first thing I did when I got my first car was grab a friend and do a 2000 mile road trip all around Britain. Mind you I did scratch the car a bit but it was fine.

Don't be a pussy.

Going for a swim after the Arsenal game

Will not be drinking that shite

Fuck off you sponge I'm 23. Didn't want your advice anyway.

Wanna go to the gym but my local is full of good looking people who run for 5 minutes then sit around on their phone.

Shitty place.

I don't understand

>searched for native american ethnicity only near me
>there's results
>they're mostly white
>one looks like this

>pornstarXx: Ya like dags
>So here it is most off my life been brought up as a gypsy love my horses and going to see horses I all so like lurchers and going hunting nothing much really if you want to know anything let me know??

We're all white.

But my sister's husband is a hardcore Catholic and they attend Latin Mass.

ahh. why not look at the job postings of positions you want, and look at what they want, and then meet the requirements? you could just go to night school while you work and get another degree if it requires one you don't have

not unless you raise them right

I've done that but it doesn't work for Cred Forums embeds for me

>23 year old '''man''' scared of a little bit of driving

unlucky

>I didn't want the advice of an anonymous stranger who I didn't even know would reply to my post

fucking howling

>Just passed his test at 23 fucking years old

howling even more. what a fucking runt you must be

>set off for gym earlier
>don't really wanna go but kinda bored and not been in a while
>walk as its only 10 minutes away
>almost get there
>realise it closes at 5 on a Saturday
>mfw

>“Fuck's sake, I will now have SEVEN nephews and nieces to buy presents for.”
>t.f.w. no brothers and no sisters, just 2 cousins whom I never see anyway.
I won't ever need to worry about this.

>What's wrong with Durham?
I fookin loove poolp fiction. The only problem of theirs.

Fine have a coffee you mong.

You sound like a complete twat who asks for advice yet doesn't listen so up yours desu

are you saying british women think american men are movie stars?

well what did you expect, there won't be any proper chugs in the UK

>Latin mass

youtube.com/watch?v=VcQlk6wZSEg choon the mandem going in innit

I love swimmies but I have nowhere to swim.

I'm going for 40 minutes at the least desu. not sure if I have it in me right now though.

>chugs

toplel is that what they're called in yankland?

What are inuits called?

>they have five sons and a daughter at the moment

must be blast having four brothers tbqh

you don't even need to make other friends

>that post
>that flag
Wew lad your parents really let the team down, everyone i know has like 2-3 siblings atleast

not having kids is extremely selfish

oh, that's not even london really. you'll be fine.. coming from up north?

the a10 is probably one of the most glorious roads into london off the m25, quite a few roundabouts but you'll be just fine. just be aware that there's quite a few junction/speed cameras.

on motorways, CHECK YOUR BLIND SPOT before changing lanes, other than that it's a peace of piss.

look at it this way, you'll improve as a driver at least in confidence from doing it

I still go to Latin Mass

Yes you do
t. had four brothers

Still running on emergency credit on my leccy meter lads

Cba to go top it up

I didn't choose the runt life

Good man

>trap
Fuck off yank
Why don't french niggers have their own genre like grime?

>LITERALLY a jesuit pope

>Your NatWest VISA Debit card remains the property of The Royal Bank of Scotland Group plc
What are you trying to say about RBS lad?

strawpoll.me/11293095

strawpoll.me/11293095

strawpoll.me/11293095

>Unironic cathocucks ITT

Done what, tried each of these options? I always use the time in seconds without an s at the end as you can see from my URL, apparently it works.

idk what Yanks call them, we call them that because that's literally all they do.

no one cares about Inuits because they basically have their own country up north and alcohol is way to expensive up there to be worth it.
they all grow weed though but so does everyone up north.

never been to that part of the territories though, only the Yukon which is white.

what for?

I guess age difference might cause problems

>Pansexual, Woman, Single, 166cm, Full figured
>I am 26, I have a degree in Wildlife & Environmental Photography
>I work in a call centre.

doxxed

Yes, you'll fucking drown in minge

Waiting for rasheed to turn up with my Indian lads

on the old pepes piri piri lads

>What are you trying to say about RBS
they right-royally fucked the œconomy.

Friends are alri when you see them a few hours a day, you're stuck with your brothers 24/7
it gets tiring

thing's gonna jump off in 2017
big year I can feel it

>he ordered Indian lads
Bender

>Homo Economicus

Gonna get a gf la?

Watched a documentary where a bloke was up in the north of Canada.

All the inuits just drank all day and moped around without jobs.

They went
>we miss the traditional ways and can't fit in!
but they don't fucking go back to the traditional ways did they

icey teardrops flip phone on my hip

>worshipping and living your life according to what a dead kike on a sticks father who lives in the sky supposedly said thousands of years ago

wew lad, is it possible to be more cucked than that? I don't think so.

>get a degree
>do a job that should be meant for people with only gcses

ah yes

>Yvon of the Yukon
wew

already completed /gf2016/

JUL (some white lad from Marseille) made his own ting. it sounds really latin influenced though
youtube.com/watch?v=1hhzklRUE0g
youtube.com/watch?v=JKm4w2bGJko
also PNL, Djadja & Dinaz, MMZ, DTF etc. are kinda doing some slow heavily autotuned "cloud" rap. It's kinda unique as it's a really different than yank cloud rap. idk rap culture here is heavily americanized so there's no really unique stuff

>but they don't fucking go back to the traditional ways did they

how can they? read Evola

why would I hire a gcse dumbo to work my till when I have PhDs lining up?

where in the north exactly, because here there is the "north" and the North.

idk what they are like in Nunavut or the NWT, I only know what Indians are like in Ontario because I lived up north.

>I'm really good at
Debating atheism, knowing about anime, giving advice to dyels on /fit/

>Favourite books, movies, shows, music and food
The God Delusion, heavy metal, kpop and grime, superhero films, scientific documentaries, Boku No Pico (it's an anime)

>The six things I could never do without
Internet (Cred Forums in particular), my fedora, video games, the abundant wealth of academia, liquor, my iPhone

>I spend a lot of time thinking about
How females these days are so unsophisticated and unworthy of gentlemen like me

>On a typical Friday night I am
Catching up on Steven Crowder and Atheism-is-Unstoppable on YouTube and having hearty keks at feminists

Gonna munch on their curry haha

Wow lads

This nigga is living the life

>girl in college class looks like a massive dyke, has a haircut like most men have atm (quiff in the middle thing with shaved sides) but it's pink and doesn't wear any make up
>still kind of attracted to her

Am I desperate or gay?

news.nationalgeographic.com/2016/09/australia-moves-gps-coordinates-adjusted-continental-drift/

Drinking today's fourteenth tea lads.

lads
i got an undercut
we normies now

>kpop and grime

>t.f.w. too young to maximize the 1990s.

Girls or don't arch their back absolutely kill my boner

>but they don't fucking go back to the traditional ways did they
I know Inuit do still practice their "old ways" pretty much uninterrupted in Nunavut and seem pretty happy there.

basically the only Natives in the Americas with a solid traditional life plus government dosh.

The gf likes to kiss while we have sex so we never do it doggy style.

big fan of this really

wish I could pull off a shaved head but i'm too ugly lmao

is that where they snip just the bottom half of the foreskin off to create a hat effect?

Got mine touched up today
But i always was a normie
[spoiler] a handsome one [/spoiler]

Iqaluit

imagine being good looking

is there a difference?

Really fucking bored.

you asked fuckwit

>a handsome one

Literally the haircut the dyke has

fuck off with your shit gimmick you twat

maybe then
like I said I've never been
Nunavut sucks anyways
it looks like an alien world

need a handsome normie bf really
(not even gay just reckon it'd sort me out)

Arch up or arch down?

So does my gf but sometimes she just wants to get fucked, which I'm down for

howling

what do the squiggly lines mean?

This season will include the series' first hour-long episode, "The Great Phatsby", a parody of The Great Gatsby which is slated to air in January.[4] On August 31, 2016, it was announced that an episode titled "The Caper Chase", inspired by the Trump University, will air in 2017.[5] This season will also include a Pokémon Go-themed episode, couch gags spoofing Robot Chicken and Adventure Time, an episode that shows how Homer learned to feel better with food, Mr. Burns hiring the Simpsons, except Homer, to be his family and Glenn Close returning as Mona.[6]

Nah it's like an uppercut but you punch them up the arse

the lad makes really consistent releases, with a lot of free tapes and stuff. he makes ALL of his beats and also the mastering I think. he's always promoting positivity, responding to fans on facebook/twitter and stuff. couldn't call myself a "fan" or anything but JUL really has a particular mystique surrounding him

Just a heads up Rasheed, most of us here never have and never will open a gook webm.

>Indian arrives
>delivery guy tells me to enjoy my meal
>say "and you"
>realise what I just did and shut the door on him

fucks sake lads

reminder there is an aussie poster in brit that has an indian gf
really don't think you could possibly be much more of a runt if you tried

no stopping at any time ever

>sucks
>it looks like an alien world
pick one desu

Not up for that lad but ill go for pints with ye
Down obviously

not a clue

t. 5 years driving experience

Gave some guy an undercut today lads. Can't believe the cunt actually thinks it looks good on him, the guy's face is the shape of a fucking circle lmao

good album 2bh

there's some cute indian girls
they are rare though

This is homecoming lads

Pretty drunk right now

>Arriva Sapphire
Ah yes, the billionaires' bus

i literally have a round face and undercut makes it look looooong and qt

That there's a zebra crossing ahead

Dunno why there isn't one in the pic tho

What do yanks think about what Britain looks like in general, just from street view and stuff

sounds ideal against the taller attacker.

Daisy Lowe on Strictly lads

haha hey a Durham edition hey haha

your loss I guess

only boring people get bored

You lads play handy?

I wouldn't want to live there I mean
visiting is fine but I like my greenspace.

Yukon is the best territory and the government still has a Homesteading act for it so it can be upgraded to a full province.

good album 2bh

Nah we call them natives or indians

it looks ancient and nice

that fat mess down at'front.

>search "undercut" on Images
>literally everyone is a minimum 9/10

IMAGINE looking like these people

people would bow down to you and clean your shoes as you walk by them

good album 2bh

It probably looks exactly as they expected it to

The squiggly lines look weird

cracking taste lad

try "quarter turns over a living line" by raime
blackesteverblack.bandcamp.com/album/quarter-turns-over-a-living-line-2

Its looks old and cozy

everything seems so close together though, don't know if I'd like that

who unironically /durham/ here?

>having kids is extremely selfish

it used to be called a short back and sides, not sure why they changed it

IMAGINE how annoying that would get, people constantly trying to trip you over in some ridiculous attempt to get you to notice them

Maybe this is why beautiful people are all such pricks?

Greater London

>there are runts in this thread who unironically have some meme haircut known as an 'undercut' and genuinely think it looks good
Honestly anytime I see someone with an undercut I give them an uppercut to the jaw pronto

just killed myself

People stare at you a lot. Girls in general are friendly and more eager to help you out even with the slightest things and men with their GF's get very protective all of a sudden.

looks beautiful x

lots of words to do by very few hours lads

the soon-to-be-girlfriend is absolutely SHITE at replying to texts, takes about two hours

aye

>a 12 hour journey is a daily commute for a yank

Probably getting SHAGGED by a BLACK MAN you fucking KEK hahahahahahahaha

a short back and sides is not an undercut

have this on my computer but I'll revisit it

Just stopped on a squiggly line lads

just vomited

think i have throat cancer

got called a neobleeper at lobby therry bday party lads

give it a cheeky post lads please

remember model shots are heavily edited m8

only freaks of nature look that good in reality

What are girls from sunderland like?

It's fine street view but England it's is just ugly as shit desu

fuck off chav

>revisit

reminder that british women are the best in the world

>tfw the screen on my TV or laptop goes dark for a second and I catch my reflection

No one listens to both kpop and grime

just checked pictures of both and i cant see the difference?

Apocalyptic

>the undercut

This is a bad sign, she's either one of those runts who reads articles on how ignoring men will make them more desperate, or she's actually disinterested in you kek

fat and drunk

>when this happens while wanking

>dat ass

world population needs to be reduced by half at least

haven't seen the soon-to-be-gf for two weeks and she's being distant
maybe she's found someone else

just found my cheque book lads, completely forgot I had it, never written a cheque in my life, might start writing some for the banter

do shops still accept cheques as payment?

Any haircut looks like shit if you're not good looking

But the undercut is the go-to runty teenager ''lad'' trim

Pic related is my goal hair

That arse doesn't look normal

bath looks like it's for mega rich people

ok x

also recommend "live in marseille" by oake xx

Is it a good idea to email the detective if I can post my "top 20 reasons I hate pakis" list?

pakis do

>another lonely saturday

a "short back and sides" has a fade from the bottom up to the top of the head
an undercut is a uniform length underneath the top

>reminder that british women are the best in the world

>chav
nerd

Looks shit.

do it, hopefully you'll get done for hate speech

iktf

have god tier thick wavey hair but I look like gareth from the office

No way that arse is real

>ascetic house
seems like a cool label

I like Varg

Need a nice hair bf

we'll start with you

hmm minor difference really imho, seems like a hipster name for an old haircut to make it sound new.

That's why I'm emailing him first, so he won't press charges since I'm basically asking "Is this illegal"?

>tfw curly Irish hair and ALWAYS look like a mong

>muh hairitage

sidecuts generally don't reduce anything on the top
short back and sides generally do

>4 posts
>1ip

oh dear

>walk around the streets of any lower class area
>Full of chavs with 'undercuts' and absolute non-existent jaws
Ah yes, the runt cut

literally all me :)

might buy some new undies tomorrow

currently having my hairs parted in the middle (despite them not being very long)

>poocastle

>sidecuts
whats this now, we were talking undercuts?

>Irish
FOY

youtube baron's war soon lads

What did Valve mean by this ?

such a cancerous poster

wait yes undercut
sidecut is something else and was a typo

I have diarrhea at the moment so it's a bit distracting

WE DID IT LADS

WE BROKE THE CURSE

muh genetics more like
I look like a paddy

Lads, what's the name of a British house track from 90s where a male voice sings 'da da da dum da da da da dum' (no joke here)?

you are a nerd

>mfw nazi germany was literally rome 2.0
>mfw we destroyed it
ONE JOB

all me

t.

Which part of Arsenal do you come from mate?

/cum/ is shit, can I live here?

can you 'stream' an offline video from your downloads folder to a TV with chromecast ?

all I've eaten today is some chips and a lot of chocolate
to be fair they were great chips and chocolate

>I have diarrhea at the moment so it's a bit distracting
fair enough, we can talk about haircuts another day lad. You concentrate on solidfying those stools, dioralyte or a glass of salty water does the trick.

no

Endless supply of single mothers in their 20s

Current status:

Short back and sides
Shirt
Skinny jeans
Converse shoes

can you hack the bants

Ermm no it doesn't.

Actually I'm white and have nice hair.

>being myself
wish i was good at that

Highbury

Might just bite the bullet and go for one

What type of woman is the most desperate yet isn't degrading to date?

>Germany
>Rome
Germany was an imposer
the USA is a better successor to Rome than anyone.

you assault people over a haircut?

its actually Finland

disgusting

...

roman empire was a bit overrated lads
ancient greece is where its at

I'm blue by eiffel something

ah yes the side effects of feminism

yeah just like how dreadlocks are illegal for whites in the states

*lays you to rest*

direct lineage maybe to the original Rome, but not the spirit of Rome

You can't be a real man with a recessed chin and pathetic jawline tbqh

the fuck even is a hedgehog anyway? what genus do they belong to? they don't look like anything

all the cool lads out tonight then

seems quite bitter on here

They are part of each other mate, its a cultural invasion of Italy by Greece followed by a an actual invasion of Greece by Rome, the Romans themselves very Greek by this time.

this
Rome was cool but the Republic > Memepire

What the fuck are you on?

I'M SO BLUE AND I DUNNO WHY,
I'M IN NEED OF A GUY,
DA BA DEE DA DA DAY.

youtube.com/watch?v=iKwqDvljwpo

lads cannot fathom the fact that hebrews killed the christ
they killed the son of god!!! baffling

i always heard it as "in aberdeen i will die" lmao

...

didn't I bully you yesterday about grime being shit

t.

what film should I watch tonight lids?

>walking through Sydney with an English teacher, somewhat naive
>tiny fat hooker dress as a ballerina asks a guy if he wants a headjob in a thick accent as we pass
>teacher whispers confused to me as we move on "whats a hedgehog?"

strawpoll.me/11293432

strawpoll.me/11293432

strawpoll.me/11293432

strawpoll.me/11293432

strawpoll.me/11293432

strawpoll.me/11293432

>family get together
>don't want to go but need to show my face
>its at my aunts house
>get there
>couple hours in
>cousin asks if I wanna smoke some weed in his room
>don't really like the lad but free weed
>smoking
>see big bottle of purple liquid
>what's that?
>oh, that's my lean, mate
>can we drink it?
>oh, erm, nah, I'm saving it for a party next week
>later found out it wasn't lean, but in fact e-liquid

Can't think a more runtish lad.

>German police are wearing chainmail to protect against blade attacks from Islamic migrants

WE MIDDLE AGES NOW

Zulu

None of those songs are grime, they're UK hip hop
Off yourself yank

furthermore, jesus was also a jew; one of gods chosen..
mental

problem child 2

stop this libel

that's ukhh you fat cunt

getting sick of these paralympic runt malteser adverts tbqhwy lads

*continues this libel*

why do you care?

Cléo de 5 à 7

...

I FUCKING HATE AMAZON!!!!

favourite sport: darts
favourite comedy: mrs browns boys
favourite beer: fosters

both are fucking wank. fuck off you cringeworthy twat

kes

DEUS VULT

favourite sport: squash
favourite comedy: monty python
favourite beer: otter

>gif

fuck off

same desu
didnt ship my maltesers on time

ah yes i love when truckers use their jake brakes in the middle of town and annoy everybody and wake everyone up even though there are clear signs posted all over the place saying they can't do it but they do it anyway because they're dickheads

NEW

Great chebs lads

Why are you so mean?

Just so you all know, whenever an image with a non-default Cred Forums filename is posted I search through the archive and add all relevant information to my database or /brit/ users.

darts
larry sanders
don't drink

ALL OV DAT ALL OV DAT

love how triggered autists get about this stuff

>reee muh nigger music wahhhh

he's an orphan, and obviously his birth parents were immigrants

The future looks bright

because its rather annoying hearing some spastic babble on about shagging some desperate runt for a minute or two

HE'S HERE

Your gimmick is shit and boring like your fucking life. You fuck off, you fat spotty paki manlet.

cougars

Is there a way to link youtube videos that get's around channel 4's bullshit copyright block?

>Shall we deport them and resume our civilized 1st world society?

>Nah, lets keep importing them and just live with it

All Germany are good for is destroying Europe time and time again. The west will benefit if the German gene were erased from the Earth

DEUS VULT

you were a stillborn baby
mother didnt want you
but you were still born

>spazzing out over spazzes

very impressive. turn off the tv next time you easily triggered runt.

why do you care mate you're not european

breitbart.com/2016-presidential-race/2016/09/24/unfair-advantage-clinton-campaign-trying-get-moderators-fact-check-trump/

fucking OUTRAGEOUS how they won't let him lie lads
what is the world coming to where politicians are encouraged to tell the truth

what?

Ode to Janny

Devon is wheelchair-bound

>triggered
didn't know it was 2014 you actual mong

aesthetic street view

Where do I find them?

Also do they like angry 23 year old kissless virgins.

Point is they're still alowed to lie

thanks to me

what has trump lied about?

what has hillary lied about?

>The west will benefit if the German gene were erased from the Earth
ah yes let's just erase all germanic peoples

*all the british disappear too*

whoops

>breitbart

shan't be reading this

>qt on pof
>smokes often
>spelt humour as 'humor'

we prefer the term 'wheelchair user' actually sweetie x

You appear to live upon an island floating through the infinite unshaped Wyld-space beyond the borders of Creation and sanity

But yes, it is aesthetic

mate this is /brit please dont, it just angers the teens when yank politics is talked bout.

>Hillary R Clinton
>Complaining about lies
lmao

Hillary is an evil witch

this is a fact

we prefer the term 'people of wheelchairs'

*grabs your handles, scoots you around and fires you straight into a wall*
fuck off you flid

I'm posting from clover and every image I save automatically uses the same file name

I have disrupted all of your data

street view TWAT

just making a bit of a point haha

want to be a travelling carnival person

did you give her an apt FOY?

...

don't know

from my small amount of knowledge on cougars, some like the thrill (not quite the right word but it's all I can think of) of teaching a younger guy how to pleasure them

But, others just want a young man to ravage them and inexperienced (read: virgin) lads don't know how to pleasure them

gonna have a field day on Cred Forums when hilldawg wins lads

and if trump wins i'll just take solace in the fact presidents can't actually do that much

Actually there was recently a vote (low turn out, place didn't have a ramp, bad planning in hindsight), and the new preferred term is Cyclo-Mobiliser(s)

>implying I have a pof account

>AmyyL24: Send nudes or **** off

>why won't men buy me things, fucking bigots
ahh?

it is

you have good taste m8 x

Imagining some fucknig turbo sperg meeting an American IRL and blurting out "FOY FOY FOY" when something like "sidewalk" was said to the utter bemusement of all present

Same here

But Trump actually likes the UK, and wants to do a trade deal ASAP

so as retarded as he is, him winnning would most likely be better for britain

looks like shed suck your foreskin off desu

holy shit brits are ugly

Want to buy a canal boat and live on it

the GOP is fully behind trump now, and the House is majority republican

trump would be more effective at passing legislation than shillary

the word bigots is not in the image though
the internet made you lose your mind

Fucking howling, I also read it as 'she looks like a shed' which makes it even funnier.

>all white

fucking racist

they call him quickdraw janny

I'm fucking crying

janny is on fire tonight

janny'll eat this.

He's on fire tonight

thats fucked up

Glad desu

"Gore edition" isn't something I really wanted to spend an hour posting in

> £30 million for the black ashley westwood

did he died

phones have literally been the same for 3 years

nothing is going anywhere

youtube.com/watch?v=FeFmsVPSyV0

the fastest volunteer in the land

>£0 million for the uncompensated Cred Forums janny

reee don't want to meet my housemates lads
feel nervous for literally no reason

imagine handing in your cv

and under work experience it says
"unpaid online custodian for an anime bulletin board"

IMAGINE

>uses past tense after 'did'

Pole spotted

bloody heck

he's alive?

new

uh oh spaghettios

Fucking hell that was jannied fast.

It's woodchippy you cunts

Phones are as good as they're going to get until you can project angry birds right onto your eyeballs

Hence driverless cars

they've got bigger

idk quite a fan of the new automatic cashier things

i got the same feeling my first day of work, but itll be fine mate. just actively conversate and try to reel the autism in

woodchipmonger

kek

lol

thanks senpai

fucking ritalin makes me awkward as fuck

JAAANNNYYY

DELTELLD?!

erm the cost of sequencing a genome is plummeting

have a night off janny bloody hell

Big J on the prowl.

It's longer than that

All they're doing now is MORE MORE MORE because they don't know what else to do it seems.

More power, more RAM, more pixels, more thin when really you don't need any of that shit. Who needs 4 Gigs of RAM on a mobile? Why do you need such a powerful processor in there? A 4k screen means jack shit on something that small.

Battery life is still shit, that's where they should really focus their efforts desu. Unless you're Apple in which case the focus is removing ports.

new

The build up is the worst bit, it'll be fine mate
>ritalin

What the FUCK are you doing mate?

I thought they stopped prescribing that awful stuff.

I was put on it briefly as a child and it turned me into a complete zombie.

woodchippy?

I'm 23 and have basically no cv at all

How much bullshit can you get away with putting on one?

Got 6gb of RAM in my OnePlus Three

Banter desu

I got a ban for 3 days for being "off–topic" in /cum/ this Monday.

>no nfc in my phone for Android Pay
>no contactless card
bit annoying ngl

My micropenis is approximately 1 inch long when flaccid and 2.7 inches long when fully erect. It is also very thin. When flaccid, you might say it resembles two raisins flat on top of each other. As it extends erect, I would guess that in length and girth, it would be the equivalent in volume of two cocktail sausages. Various studies suggest that the average American penis is 2.8–3.9 inches flaccid and around 4.7–6.3 inches when erect.

I am deeply ashamed of my micropenis, and that is largely because of things I hear women say about it. I can only speak from personal experience, but the number of times I have heard women making fun of men for the size of their manhood is staggering. At one time, I actually overheard three or four of my colleagues at work all agreeing that "men with small dicks should be made to wear a sign warning women."

Numerous scientific studies have suggested time and again that for a huge number of women, tiny penises are simply undesirable. I am 35 and have had just one sexual experience (through personal choice), which was humiliating, to say the least. It was more than 12 years ago with a very attractive university student. When I stripped, she stared at my micropenis, giggled, and put her hand to her mouth, muttering simply "OK" in a tone that suggested she was taken aback. When it came to actually performing, first I found that the condom wouldn't stay on, but more frustratingly, my micropenis kept falling out every time I tried to penetrate her. Even when I was inside her, she kept asking me, "Is it in?" Every time she asked me that, I wanted to die. It was clear that she was getting nothing out of the experience. I genuinely tried my best to make her happy via oral sex, but she didn't orgasm or enjoy that either. When at last I finally thought I was making her content, she suddenly huffed in an annoyed way and got up, saying she needed a glass of water. And that was the end of it.

I asked my mum to do a fake 4 year reference for me, we spent a day working out the intricate lie details

got a decent job from it very quickly

JANNY JANNY JANNY

DISHING OUT THE BANNY

STILL DOESN'T GET PAID.

>tfw you just want to have some fun /brit/posting before you go out to drink with the lads on a Saturday night
>tfw janny doesn't have friends so he spends his Saturday nights cleaning up /brit/ threads passive-aggressively

feeling bad for him tbqh

>went for the HD compact model
>longer battery life than the FullHD full size model

I can only imagine the level of disappointment and frustration she must have felt. It must have been a horrendous experience for her. Furthermore, a couple of days later, I did something, which on reflection, I now regret. I walked 2 miles to her apartment to leave her a box of Nestle Mint After Eights, which I had bought to show both appreciation for her intimacy and also as an apology. What kind of loser does that? What was I thinking? That she had had sex with a pathetic excuse for a man, but that it was all worth it in the end because she got some chocolate instead? I couldn't help feel like she deserved better.

Aside from personal experiences, the media doesn't help my shame either. In the U.K., Channel Four just broadcast a TV series entitled Naked Attraction, the premise being that people choose from six potential dates based solely on their naked bodies. In the season finale, six guys were lined up in front of a stunningly beautiful woman who seemed to have a nice personality. Before selecting a date, the female presenter asked her if penis size was important, to which she replied: "Yes. I've been in a situation before where a guy treated me like an absolute princess and then when it came down to it, he had the tiniest penis." As a guy with a micropenis, watching what looked like such an amazing woman say that sliced through my soul. It made me feel totally worthless, and I can't imagine what that guy she was referring to must have felt like. She was only being honest, but the message was clear: We are not good enough for you.

jan jan he's our man
if nobody can kill /brit/, janny can!

well its technically fraud so if you are found out you'll lose your job and will find it very hard to get another.

That's awful

Pædožıdovka, požaluĭsta.

school fuel desu, got essays to be doin

couldnt imagine actually having a girlfriend

...

The way the media treats the body-shaming of men compared to the body-shaming of women is so wildly different. When Donald Trump makes questionable comments about the looks of women, he rightly causes outrage. Lists and videos decrying his sexist remarks have gone viral. Yet when a naked model of him with a micropenis was displayed in public in New York City, there was some objection (the artist was blocked from Facebook), but in my opinion, it was treated like a punch line rather than an attack. Some publications even called it a wonderful piece of art. Hundreds of Americans now have selfies of them laughing with Trump and a micropenis. We defend Heidi Cruz and Megyn Kelly, but where are the people defending small penises?

From my experience (having read hundreds of articles, forum posts, videos, and having spoken to hundreds of women online), it feels safe to say that the overwhelming majority of women aren't thrilled about the prospect of sex with micropenises. And if we don't accept that these views are likely the majority, then we are never going to challenge this blatant discrimination.

I would like to ask people to think about this: If you are attracted to somebody enough to ask them to bed, and if the guy is kind to you, is it fair to write him off based on size alone?

Micropenises are god's way of telling you not to procreate.

Janny do you have any friends?

>tfw no janny bf

Same lad, got a Z3C myself

It's a bit shit though, supposed to be waterproof but one of the flaps don't stay sealed shut so it's really a pain in the ass. The headphone jack also just stopped working within a month. Need to send it in for repair, but there's never really an opportune time to send off a phone

>cost per chromosome

So what do I plan to do about my love life? The answer is nothing. I try to focus my life on my writing and other subjects that interest me. If I started to look for love, it would just make me feel down, and I already struggle with depression and anxiety secretly. I don't need the humiliation and hurt that looking for love would bring me. Sure, everybody gets rejected, but usually for less hurtful reasons.

Guys with micropenises know they are not well-endowed, they don't need reminding of it. If I'm attracted to a woman, then what she has in her pants doesn't matter to me; I care more about what she has in her heart. My deep shame about my body makes me feel like everyone else's opinion must be right, that there is something wrong with my size. I just wish people could look past it, so I could too.

oh fuck off lad

literally everybody lies on their cv and nothing ever happens

I think ritalin contributed to mental health problems later in life so I'd be careful or just stop.

You don't need pills to concentrate just a foot up your arse.

dad walked in on me trying to twerk earlier

could see the resent in his eyes

Nice pasta, shitdick.

My phone is better than your phone

doubt it

high score on snek lad?

business idea: designer willy socks called willy warmers

people with decent cvs dont need to lie.

and i also said 'if'. read posts properly before sperging out next time.

I have a bit of bullshit on mine but I feel I might need to hike up the bullshit level a bit more because its not getting me very far.

no

get ur chin up blud !!!

was skyping the gf while messaging the bit on the side
what am I like lads hahaha

need a new RIGHT NOW

hate the english so god damn much

They already exist, they're for circumcised people that want to get some feeling back in their bellend

fucken noob

jock

>plane flies into building
>entire building explodes from every side
why do people call 9/11 "conspiracy" theorists crazy again?

...

lying on your CV is like lying on your car insurance

ahh yes it's parked overnight on a driveway and i only ever use it to pop to the shops

check your privilege engcuck

saturday night and the janny is off on one

Fuck off yank

>Decent CV
>2015 - Present: Janitor at Cred Forums.org

>spending 5 minutes to find a proxy only to get banned instantly

is this guy a mong

>tfw we were born a generation too early for cell regenerative immortality

Not only that but as the population exponentially increases over the next millenia we will grow more statistically unlucky

>t.f.w. waiting on a new 1.

Why does every car look the same these days? Why don't people design cars like 50s/60s American cars?

>i only ever use it to pop to the shops
which insurer asks you this
it's always "pleasure", "commuting and pleasure" "work" and that's it

Might have another wank, already had two today

>500 posts
ooer not liking this at all its too odd

...

because safety standards mean that things generally look similar to adhere to such standards

>ahh yes it's parked overnight on a driveway
you say that like you don't actually have a driveway to park your car on

errmm try again honey you can actually see the wall buckle inward and initiate the collapse
youtube.com/watch?v=gJbGm7GE1tA

got a habit of hanging on to dead gimmicks haven't you.

new

They don't look the same

In the 50s and 60s, aerodynamics wasn't a thing so they just designed everything as boxes

going to bed now bye

new gimmicke lades : adde an e to the end of randome words like ye olde english

On the phone

jocke

poope lole

Fuckin ell could you imagine how terrifying it would be to be there

explain this to a pleb

Right, same model as mine. Haven't really drowned it yet, but I noticed it's not meant to be used underwater because in the shower the touchscreen started registering touches where there weren't.

going on a date in a few lads
rate the 'fit