/brit/

wise words Bruce

Posting my two favourite YouTube videos and my favourite Wikipedia article

m.youtube.com/watch?v=jr2gdPY-88w

m.youtube.com/watch?v=CYunIrWDANU
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sandbar_Fight

Awfully slow so far lads let's get some discourse going

ah yes, brute force

Yep

ahh yes the moral high ground

What is it that you like about her?

Imagine how funny a terrorist attack would be in Britain

You'd see a shaky handheld film of it from someone's camera, you'd hear the gunshots and people shouting out things like 'Blimmin heck'! 'Bloody hell!' 'corr blimey!' 'Gordon Bennet!' etc

a girl I know has a back tattoo.

Red flag?

how long have you been dating?

absolute nut case

Was there more of this conversation?

Not funny at all, Rasheed

I still remember the 7/7 attacks

She's nice when she isn't suffering from mental illness and lack of emotional maturity from being a shut-in.

Since November, then we broke up in April and got back together a bit later

strawpoll.me/11332169

strawpoll.me/11332169

strawpoll.me/11332169

strawpoll.me/11332169

You should break up, seems like a toxic relationship

Just got a new spoiler installed lads.

He has Helsinki syndrome mate, he won't leave her.

does david mitchell do stand up? He's my fav british comedian but the only thing i reallly know him from is peep show.

I've dropped girls for far less than this

you are likely both awful

Another good man lost hm
Exquisite triples by the way

Ah yes plenty more

She said she was going to send "a confrontational letter", but not til I got home. I said she should send it before so I can read it sooner on the bus. That triggered her response in the prior screen cap.

Continued

You gotta leave her m8
Being in a relationship with a legitimately mentally ill girl will take a severe toll on you in the long run

I know because I was in one with a 9/10 for 5 years and looking back on it it wasn't worth it

Yes of course having sex with a beautiful girl everyday is awesome but not when it comes at the cost of your mental and emotional health

Don't know why you'd bother going out with a mentalist even if you were desperate.

mate...............you've been dating literally less than a year even without the breaks and you have arguments where she threatens to leave. i don't know why you'd even bother in all honesty, no pussy is worth this shite.

not impressed with ios 10

creasing

You were given 3 strikes? How did you fuck up three times?

He appears on loads of British panel shows like Would I Lie To You? and Mock the Week. He pretty much plays himself in Peep Show.

Oi lads, let's destroy Iraq!

the poster below me is australian

Not impressed with you

It's a shame that the old adage is true

Ye

>3 strikes

An Americanism pervades yet another culture

Also did a sketch show

what did you do this time?

g'day mate

...

I haven't downloaded it yet and probably won't experience it until I upgrade to an iPhone 7 around Christmas time

From what I gather it really doesn't offer anything the current iOS does aside from gimmicks like being able to like or laugh at a text

youtube.com/watch?v=hn1VxaMEjRU

youtube.com/watch?v=wt3n-N8aOKU#t=33

Here are the three occasions

-I told her that sometime I hide my feelings, strike 1
-I didn't block some girl she didn't like who I don't talk to anyway, strike 2
-Strike 3 was not mentioning that my friend plays overwatch with that girl and that by extension we play in the same group

*sigh* what do you want?

una vela

What a drama queen she must have a dull life. Dump her lad.
For sme reason girls are more prone to it than men. Never heard anyone here saying 3 strikes here.

Funny thing is I bet she has no idea it's baseball related, probably just uses it because she heard it on an american tv programme.

>upgrade
>to an iPhone 7

ah yes

alri thailad

I told her I wanted to read her letter on the bus

>Funny thing is I bet she has no idea it's baseball related, probably just uses it because she heard it on an american tv programme.

I would be surprised if it was any other way desu

howling

what the fuck are you doing? what would possess you to stay with such a fucking spastic

alri

Business idea: Cornish independence

is this girl even that hot? can you post her head?

You so realize that you two are not playing "the same game", right? What she considers inappropriate (probably because of feelings of inferiority and past traumas of being left behind) you do not, and as long as you two refuse to see this basic flaw in communication, no positive or real change will come

Tell her to fuck off Bruce.

This madness has to stop.

Breakfast idea, cornflakes

>I'm just eager
nice save.

keep posting

THAILAAAAAD

Currently rocking the 5s lad

iPhones are quite simply the best thing on the market

Android phones are filled with bloatware that to get rid of requires you to root it and thus void the warranty

Lmao

You woke me up you aussie fuck

here you go m8, here's some reading for the bus trip

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality_disorder

exceptional consistency

I don't know anymore

Yeah she's pretty attractive

Well her entire family committed suicide over the years and she was violently raped as a child

>no headphone jack
>willingly subjecting yourself to one apple's testing grounds for how much bullshit they can get away with and still turn a profit

It's rather impressive 2bqh

>Well her entire family committed suicide over the years and she was violently raped as a child
what the fuck

Battery dead be with you in 10-15 lads haha

post her then

...

The fuck is up with these dumb women and this dog filter photo?

Looks like the Mexican finally hopped over the border.

don't get me STARTED

10/10 post

I don't know but it needs to stop, right now

Let's have hot non gay sex session in the moonlight

wearing white selvedge jeans atm lads

So why won't you take the time to sit down and have a conversation? If she isn't more than meat to you I can understand but if you feel compelled to stay that implies that you have feelings of friendship towards her. This isn't about you over-stepping the boundaries of the relationship, it's got to do with the fact that she's mentally unwell. You shouls help her lad, or at least tell her to get help, in a non-accusive way

hello how are you i have decided i would brush my teeth after school today thank you and how are you okay bye

Wish my internet came with a "dog filter" because then I wouldn't even know half of them haha

Check your privilege

DON'T BLINK, THEY WON'T EVEN MISS YOU AT ALL

You're so vain, I bet you think this post is about you. Don't you? Don't Yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooou?

First off it comes with wireless earphones and if you don't like that then you can solve it easily with pic related

The fact is that Apple is simply doing away with archaic tech and moving us into the future

I had doubts about their ability to keep it up now that Steve Jobs has passed on but they assuaged my fears with their latest releases

i'd shag her fanny

*takes BIG LONG strides about town with PRIDE*

2deep4me

What if I want to charge my mobile and use wired headphones at the same time?

Guess you're proper FUCKED then

except iphones have notoriously shit battery life mid to long term and so you won't be able to use any wired headphones while charging the phone.

>wireless earphones

ah yes, wireless earphones that you will lose immediately and shell out more shekels to (((apple))) to replace

also this

What is it with fucken Asians?

So how exactly is this an upgrade again? Because I can do that with my current mobile.
Even worse, they seem to have removed the headphone jack with no apparent benefit. They're just testing to see how much shit they can get away with.

But if they're trying to move into 'wireless future', why didn't they include wireless charging? I know two people who work for Apple retail and they both said it's purely to make money.

A new set of Airpods (their wireless headphones) are $150, their old headphones were $50. Seems pretty obvious to me.

Lad, stop what you are doing, and get the fuck out of this relationship. She's an emotional mess who will not stop

*looks through thick role-playing guides, eventually throws it on to the floor with the floor with a loud THUMP* I don't know how to... How do I IMPROVE? *starts sobbing*

Going to Devon today lads

my aunt used to be a goth in the 80s and she has a picture of her holding my older sister pretty much exactly like this

Why are you arguing with me? If anything I'm on your side mate

Why would you do that lad?

They just want to make money because they don't own the patent for the 3.5mm jack but they do for the lightning port, so every time a factory produces an accessory for it they have to pay a royalty. Same goes for wireless charging, they don't own the rights, therefore having wireless charging makes them nothing.

Apple is a terrible for things like this. Their best computer on the market costs double what it should for 3 year old hardware.

Is your aunt a bit of a ganga? I hear those goth chicks go off in the sack.

fucking Jews lad

fucking Jews

...

Get a splitter

Nah not really
I've had my 5s for coming up on 3 years now and still get excellent battery life

Just tie them together with a cord and you won't lose them

Use a little ingenuity for once in your life

>Apple retail
Also known as people who are completely clueless when it comes to tech

Also current wireless charging tech is no different plugging it in you still have to keep your phone stationary on the charging mat

wtf I am redpilled now

Imagine all the fun we could have if italics was allowed on here

what is her taste in music, just out of curiosity?

i dunno, she did get drunk once and tell me that she loves me but wouldn't fuck me, i was 16 at the time

Fuck that, I can't stand wops

nah, yes really. every single person i know who has an iphone carries a charger with them so they can plug it in. i've never been to a pre-drinks where there isn't communal sharing of chargers. they have shit batteries which can't be replaced and die quickly so lol u just get a nu 1

ha

can we see a face or is that too much to ask?

sup lads

what a luverly day to hate Sheffield

Have to piss really bad but I'm in the shower. What the fuck do I do?

how is reviewbrah not fat from all the shitty food he eats?

Looks like she has a nice bod from what I can see

Giz some more la'

Come on now, the lassie's had a hard enough life as it is

Sorry lad

why are you using your phone in the shower lad?

That's a yes then.

>Avengers

ha what a dolt

Is this your gimmick Piotr

Good genetics

He's also 6'4" which is another sign of superior genetics

Just be yourself

Why do they call Italian guys wops?
When you throw a piece of shit against a wall it goes WOP!

Aim directly at the drain hole you dumb cunt. I need to piss and i'm about to have a shower too; I'm going to do exactly that when i'm in there.

aye

also from now on my gimmick will be posting this cheeky hedgehog being massaged on the belly

youtube.com/watch?v=HW-y6WnDr8U
bored

no he's not

enjoying this hedgehog gimmick already
so adorable

This is a good gimmick

Getting my daily dose of Molyneux and Sargon lads

You piss in the shower. How is this a mystery to you?

Have to see my gran

Why are you doing your reviews in your car?

Are they still stalking you?

listening to some DIO, lads
youtube.com/watch?v=4vDjoLOAA6k

i.4cdn.org/wsg/1475074934703.webm

It's like he WANTS to hotbox with piss

Listening to Persuader and Hammerfall.

what a bitch, why even bring it up then
cock teases are brutal

someone post the daily dose webm with sound please

are you fucking BLIND

It's his only meal of the day

Business idea: purchase a pet hedgehog

RETARD

She was dropping hints to him, he just doesn't realise it. I won't bore you with the details, but basically she wanted to fuck.

youtube.com/watch?v=_x8e8QwPofc

business idea: vegan fast food restaurants

aaaand back to r*ddit you go

wtf why was my post deleted?

Are you fucking daft?

Did they died?

*doesn't do that*

It wasn't. That glitch is old as hell.
Refresh the page you newshit.

found the new lad

I've been coming here for a while and that's the first time I've ever seen it.
Nope.

I deFOO'd and yes

archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/83515137/#83515137

...

i dont want to fuck my aunt, she's like 50

youtube.com/watch?v=YCeQLeQiRP4

sending a confrontational letter

Was she 50 when she told you though?

ahh yes, yanks

obviously not

fucking idiot

fucking dumbass

stupid cunt

haha why's Telstra so shit don't you bogan cunts have any competitors on the market

requesting that i have immediate access to a confrontational letter for convenience sake

pls be real

>Well her entire family committed suicide over the years and she was violently raped as a child
yikes
get out of there while you can for fuck sake

What on earth are you on about mate

Any of you lads like to fish?

Here's a nice bass I caught the other evening

nice

it's illegal to possess sharp hooks in the EU

nice

He obviously caught it with his hand you red-bottomed runt

theres no fucking way reviewbrah is 6'4
he looks small in his videos

nice

i.4cdn.org/wsg/1473860963819.webm

noice

noiiiic

hi

That's because he only weighs like 100 lb

What is this trash, didn't listen

caught a fish this big
o_____________________________o

theres a few irish posters in this general who just link shite stuff all day

to whom it may concern,

I am writing on behalf of my client who wishes to have the confrontational letter released immediately and in full so that it may be read, examined and responded to appropriately. I am writing to you in good faith that such requests will be carried out in a prompt and diligent nature or else necessary legal action may be taken in order to have the letter released which may incur fees for your firm and/or client if my client wishes to have the court recognise your responsibility for my fees.

Sincerely,

Moosey, Attorney at Paw

>just went out a caught a bass
>it wasn't a nice one

fuck sake lads

DELET THIS PADDY

whats his bmi then?

>go out a catch a bass
>realise it's a double bass
nice nice

went out fishing but had a bit of treble catching a bass hahahahahaha

*jumps off bridge*

I forgot to wash off some hydrocortisone cream off my fingers last night and now they're numb

have I fucked up?

*walks into /brit/ and clicks on kettle*
Morning lads, anyone for tea?

What're you using that for famalam?

>go out a catch a bus
>realise it's a double bus
nice nice

Think I'd marry reviewbrah if given the cgance no homo

I forgot to wash off some whipped cream off my nipples last night and now they're smelly

have I fucked up?

>Real Aussie Hours

*revs microwave*
yeah mate just making my hot water now

Lads I can never eat food as soon as I get up or I vomit, anyone else had this problem?

lube

eczema
is that how it's supposed to work? stops the itching by numbing the skin?

Went out and found a nice bass today

youtube.com/watch?v=I6y3RQEPkpQ#t=83s

Earl grey?

>microwave
Turbo runt

Every Anglo and Japanese person has a kettle in their home

I used to but got over it after a while, start with small amounts.

yeah I can never eat food as soon as I vomit either

I'm never hungry from when I wake up until a couple hours later so I don't force myself to eat breakfast

Why are you doing so?

the sunlight hurts my eyes

Nah lad you heat up water in the microwave

Trying to gain weight lad so need more calories

*gets up from chair and shuts blinds, rubs eyes and continues browsing /brit/*

So eat more later

This isn't that difficult lad

I have seborrhoeic dermatitis (a form of eczema) around my nose and used to use that shit. Never really worked for me. Now I use a 2% Ketoconazole shampoo every second day and gently wash my face with it and it clears right up.

...

me

haha he's a bloody 'choo

*looks at you in disgust*

no you fag, Lyons

>HE DID IT WITH THE ACCENT THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN!

I used to get eczema in the winter because snow would get in between my jacket and gloves and melt there, in a cool damp spot and it made my wrists all red and gross

If you can't get your point across in half that amount of words you should keep your mouth shut.

TEN THINGS THAT REQUIRE ZERO TALENT

>Being on time
>Work ethic
>Effort
>Body language
>Energy
>Attitude
>Passion
>Being coachable
>Doing extra
>Being prepared

Now go out and succeed

me and the lads

Pseudointellectuals tend to be very verbose in a subconscious effort to obfuscate the fact that what they have to say is neither original nor interesting

t. fat hairy lad off of that comic

if you're not hairy you can't really call yourself a man can you

>tfw fail on every one of these points

good channel

In a statement such as this, an anonymous Cred Forumsellectual strives to prove his uncanny and quite irrepressible tendency for truth and wit, and in a case such a this one, has succeeded on both accounts.

TEN THINGS THAT REQUIRE ZERO TALENT

>Being on time
>Work ethic
>Effort
>Body language
>Energy
>Attitude
>Passion
>Being coachable
>Doing extra
>Being prepared

Now go out and succeed

alri

PAN

ANGLE

ISM

THINGS THAT REQUIRE ZERO EFFORT
>Be handsome
>Be charming
There you go, now go out and succeed

*nods in your direction*

Would kill to be half as good looking as Gandy tbchwyf

alri irelad

The British empire is dead get over it
youtube.com/watch?v=3MkZsvrxXxI

*takes out your willy and inserts into my bum*

*clenches fists*

It's funny, there's quite a small difference between being incredibly good looking and ugly. Change a couple of this guy's features a bit for instance, and he'd be quite ugly

thanks all me

what is dead may never die

but rises again, harder, stronger

THINGS THAT REQUIRE ZERO EFFORT
>Getting a blowie off your mum
There you go, now go out and suckseed

...

whatever floats your boat lad

Why doesn't the world adopt a single currency?

I'm a Republican but I'm fine with something along these lines.

*high fives you*

radical d00d!

The economies within countries are too diverse.

it's called ethereum

Currencies are printed from a central bank during deficit spending. If say, Africa adopted the Euro, the Germans would probably still control the printing of it, making them not really a sovereign nation, but a German satrapy.

AKA like the rest of these bitch boys in Europe.

...

mm yes a satrapy
*surreptitiously opens google*

Yeah well fucken herp derp shit dicky poop butt poop poop.

t. was in set 3 in school
t. had a magenta tie

express.co.uk/news/uk/715623/Queen-English-wiped-London-high-levels-immigration-2066-university-york-Dominic-Watt

thanks

...

Why does Greece, a country that represents less than 2% of EU GDP, continue to receive bailouts instead of just defaulting?

if you were classically educated such as i the meaning of the word would be apparent

*chuckles iindulgently and swirls my brandy*

haha cheers

suddenly feel sad

ah yes

aussie aussie aussie

cheer up

It keeps Turkei away

all better thanks haha

Classically educated?

Tell me, what were Achilleus' two choices within the Iliad?

Reply within a minute or I shall mark you a pleb.

10 o'clock and im drunk

what a time to be alive

There is an unconvincing tranny sitting about a meter away from me and he keeps laughing to himself.

business idea: trigger article 50 today to collapse deutsche bank

i went to york and had a similar experience except the tranny was constantly farting

don't go to york kids

Ask her if she's been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder

brb going to York

Looking forward to seeing all hell break loose when it becomes apparent that Germany has no choice but to break the rules they are punishing the Greeks and Italians with and bail out DB.

i only ever pretended to read it

same with arscheluys, fuck reading a gay play

feel like punching the sis in the eye socket at times

which is conflicting for me because i would never hit a girl

wish i had a brother instead haha

*pull into the estate in my 2008 BMW 520d SE*
*see the gf pulling out of our gaff in her 2010 1.2 Fiat 500 Lounge*
*pull up next to her and roll window down*
*she's wearing full juicy couture tracksuit, looking absolutely buff*
aiya darlin where you off to? sold free motors today so smiffy said I could take the rest'uh the day off
aiya babe I'm just off to the hairdressers to geh it coloured cos me n the girls ar goin sugarhut tonight then I'm taken bentley to the groomers, took him for a walk around the front garden earlier an e got well dirty
*see our pug bentley on the passenger seat*
alri babe, maccies or wagamamas for dinner tonight?

how old are you that you still argue in such a way with your siblings?

I've read the illiad (good book) but I have no idea. Tell me.

We're twins, both 19, but she has borderline personality disorder which basically means she can't get along with anyone without emotionally abusing them.

You will never know the struggle until you try to maintain a relationship with one of them my dude.

>mfw my older brother managed to catch a swordfish
>mfw i cant fish 4 shit

taking a shit lads

Peterborough just got a Wagamamas, I'm buzzing

did you eat him?

I know someone with it. I don't like her.

But you know she's fucked so why does it make you angry? You should be above it. Grow up.

Since the UK has inherited EU laws, once article 50 is triggered, I wonder if there will be any loopholes to exploit.

For instance if there isn't a preexisting UK law for something, it's only illegal due to EU laws and it's not immediately replaced..

Frogposter you cuck

only fish near me are some weird trout-salmon hybrids

cant really fish for 'em anymore since some cunt decided to let his cattle graze on that side of the river and im scared of cows :(

pay denbts

No I catch and release

Bass aren't really good eating anyway

HE CAN DIE AT TROY AND BE REMEMBERED FOREVER, OR GO BACK HOME AND BE A GAYLORD BUT HISTORY WILL FORGET HIM

That's his entire fate.

dad is slowly getting more racist

show him Cred Forums

VERY nice bass vibrating at incredible hihg speed

>Killing Scottish people in York with Longbows becomes legal again

New golden age?

Somehow the knowledge that she's fucked in the head doesn't make her endless screaming matches with my mum, threats of attempting suicide, blasting loud music, and having tantrums when you don't feel like talking to her any better.

I thought Greece was all about the fishing life

which one of you was this

the greek fascination with "glory" and their concept there-of is truly fascinating

> intentionally injuring animals for fun

fuck off future serial killer

New golden age.

>parents are apolitical
>everyday tell them what has happened in the news
>after a while they expect me to and enjoy hearing it from me because it's usually interesting
>tell them the gritty reality of modern nihilistic society and watch it slowly change them
>other day tell them about that 60 year old man who takes his 32 year old gay lover outside in public dressed in leather gimp gear on a leash and makes him fetch sticks for him like a dog in a small rural English village, and that he thinks soon his behaviour will be normalised
>mfw watching them go from "Well live and let live" to "These bloody freaks should be thrown in jail." after being bombarded with the reality of modern life

Joke's on you i fish with a bow

>scared of cows
Cmon man
They are mans best friend after dogs
1.Dogs
2.Cows
~Power-Gap~
100.shit
101.Manchester City F.C
~Power-Gap~
1000 More shit
~Power-Gap~
10000.Cats
It is but i fucking hate it.
I love hunting tho.
This year will hunt boars in Pindus.
HYYYPE1!

I hunt boars in Texas every year

I use a suppressed AR-10 with a night optic
They're a pest animal so I can take down as many as I like

Use a sawzall to butcher them

>sunny outside
>crisp, fresh air
>slightly warm yet slightly cold at the same time

love september 2bh

The fucking state of this.

Looks like a tranny

>Saudi princess ‘made decorator kiss her feet’ inside palatial Paris flat before allegedly telling bodyguard: ‘You have to kill this dog’

parasite nation

will greatly please me when their relevance fades

this desu

>tfw ι have an old shotgun that got passed down from father to son.
>tfw i dont even know the model or the manufacturer
>tfw i never even bothered to look it up
Kek

need her baby punching

business idea:

go back in time and find women who are actually worth marrying

business idea: be worth marrying yourself first

where's the new thread you useless cunts

literally emotional warfare

women are terrible

is basic bad? 7 out of 8 are p. hot

Literally physically and mentally sick

new

It's just sour grapes.